Finding a lover is what people want all their lives. However, it is easier to fall in love than to be together. In a long life, there are not many people who can maintain love for a lifetime.
Some people say that love, just a hormone, has a time limit. Love is an impulse and mutual attraction. The beginning of love is the role played by this attraction.
When you are in love, you are happy and beautiful. At this time, in the eyes of lovers, each other is beautiful, and the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. And because of love, we can tolerate each other even if there are shortcomings. This is also one of the reasons why love makes people feel good.
Therefore, poems about love have never stopped since ancient times. For example, when can I meet you by Li Bai? At this point, this night is awkward "; Li Shangyin "Although my body doesn't have bright phoenix wings, I feel the harmonious heartbeat of the sacred unicorn"; Bai Juyi's "How we hope that two birds will be one, fly in the sky, grow together on the earth, and have two branches in one tree." And so on.
The beauty of love lies in acacia. This is because two lovers don't live together, there is no contact day and night, and they can only rely on acacia to solve their worries. In the love stage, I can't wait to be together all the time, I can't wait to divide the time, and I don't want to be separated.
In marriage, love becomes together. From "I can't see you for a day, it's like being separated from Sanqiu" to "sharing a room every day and sharing a bed at night". At the beginning, it may still be beautiful, because at this stage, love is still there and we can tolerate each other. But with the passage of time and the change of mentality, human nature is gradually exposed.
The feeling of love gradually fades or even loses in the process of being together. I interviewed some couples who have been married for more than ten or twenty years and asked them how they feel about love. Most people say that where there is love, it is just a habit; In other words, we will live for the children.
You see, after being married for a long time, love is gone, some become family ties, and some become habits. And in this process, what kind of psychological changes have taken place in them? Or what happens in daily life, no one knows. The so-called "marriage is like wearing shoes", in which the feelings can only be understood by the parties themselves.
Falling in love is easier than being together. The hard part is that after living together, there is no privacy for each other, and everything, including advantages and disadvantages, is exposed to the lover. In marriage, the heart of mutual tolerance is gone. In the eyes of the other party, the advantages are narrowed, but the disadvantages are infinitely magnified.
That's it, so there are more and more things that couples quarrel and toss each other. Too much noise and too much trouble make people tired easily. At this time, divorce may be on the agenda. Love is short, so the feeling of love is also short; We have been together for a long time, so there are many shortcomings exposed. By the time we are ready to divorce, the feeling of love has long since disappeared, or only hatred remains.
Once, a friend and a husband and wife had a terrible quarrel. I advised them separately to think about the original beauty. But the man said, that feeling has long been forgotten;