It's definitely not a good idea to find an excuse not to go home for the New Year. As children, we should open our hearts to our parents, not refuse or escape. Find a suitable time to talk to your parents and tell them what you really think. Let them know the real reason why you are single so far, and let them know that you are working hard. In addition, young people should let their parents know your plans for work and study, which can also build more trust in your parents' hearts.
It is worth noting that you must not casually promise your parents about next year. Because if you can't do it by then, you may be pushed even worse.
In the face of parents' "urging marriage", a large number of people rush to choose an dissatisfied object to get married because they can't stand the pressure. They think everything is worth it as long as their parents are happy. In fact, when you are alone, your parents will anxiously urge you to fall in love quickly. They say that when you are in love, you are not alone. When you have a partner, your parents will start urging you to get married. They said get married, and only when you get married can you live a down-to-earth life. When you get married, your parents will start urging you to have children again. They said to have a baby soon. It is difficult to have a child when you are old. But when you have a baby, you will find many things waiting for you, such as diapers, milk powder, kindergartens, primary schools, junior high schools, going abroad and so on.
Therefore, no matter how your parents urge you, you should stick to your marriage and love stance and mate selection criteria. You can't get married rashly because of your parents' "urging marriage".
How to treat the blind date arranged by parents?
There are always things that can't be done, and there are always people urging you. Life is really endless. If your blind date, marriage and having children are all to meet other people's expectations, you will eventually get lost in fatigue. Everyone should have their own pace of life. No matter how anxious your parents are, you should listen to your inner voice. Wronging ourselves, I believe that our parents who love us the most will not be happy.
Many young people often show great disgust at blind dates arranged by their parents. If you really don't want to get a love and marriage through blind date, you should make it clear to your parents. Let them know that you have a better way to get your happiness than blind date. So your parents won't force you to have a blind date.
If you can't change your parents' mind anyway, it's better to accept it with a smile than with painful obedience. It is also a good experience to turn the pressure of parents' "urging marriage" into motivation and go on a blind date during the long vacation. Perhaps the most important person in life is waiting for you not far away.
I understand my parents' kindness, but I don't want a "make do" marriage.
On March 10, I interviewed Mr. Liu, the poster, to listen to his heart.
Mr. Liu told me that the reason why he posted his "encounter" on the forum was mainly to listen to some opinions of other netizens and to listen to some opinions or suggestions from everyone. Because of the sudden "marriage", Mr. Liu doesn't know how to deal with it.
Mr. Liu said he was a foreigner. I came to Longyan to study in university in 2009 and stayed in Longyan after graduation. After working for more than a year, he didn't meet a satisfied girl, so he remained single until he went home for the Spring Festival this year. "My family thought I didn't look for it on purpose, so I was brainwashed at home every day for a few days during the Chinese New Year, and I felt a little inferior. Is it useful to read so many books? Look at others. I don't read much. Everyone is married. I am really envious. " Mr. Liu spoke his mind.
Mr. Liu said that he understands the good intentions of his parents. Why didn't he want to find a girlfriend, but he never met a more satisfied one? Is it useful to worry so much? You can't just find a girl to fall in love and get married! He doesn't want a makeshift marriage.
Empathy pays attention to communication and understands the "love" of parents.
In response to Mr. Liu's "experience", I interviewed Mr. Ruoshui, the head of Longyan Service Center of China Association of Marriage and Family Counsellors and a national second-class marriage and family counselor.
If the teacher told me that Mr. Liu's parents' "urging marriage" is a conflict of values between parents and children, parents will definitely be anxious when they see other children getting married, which is actually their "love" for their children; As a younger generation, they don't want to inherit the traditional ideas of their parents, but hope that they can meet people they like and have feelings, so as to keep the "love" they want and fulfill their "filial piety" to their parents.
If the teacher advises Mr. Liu to face such conflicts with a normal heart, put yourself in the other's shoes, pay attention to communication with parents, understand and affirm their "love" for themselves. At the same time, we must first recognize and accept parents' anxiety, accurately express our inner feelings and strive for parents' understanding. In this way, the existing problems can be solved smoothly.