The door was gently pushed open and Shen crept in. Every time my daughter comes home, she walks into her room like a thief. Shen thought helplessly, he just wanted to see if his daughter slept well. However, Shen Zhou obviously didn't sleep well, frowned and his eyelashes were trembling. Shen sighed silently, quietly raised his hand, landed on her brow, touched it like a dragonfly, and suddenly put it down. Three years of cracks, can this wipe be smoothed out? Uneven, and every time I go home, I feel strange in Shen Zhou's heart. So when Shen Yi left the room, she opened her eyes. She knows the bed, and she is used to the hard wooden bed in the dormitory, just as she is used to the hard father-daughter relationship. However, why did Simmons let her fall, and just a warm gesture would make her weak? Shen Zhou recalled the temperature of his father's fingertips. That kind of coolness, like the yellow leaves in early autumn blowing across the bleak ground, makes people sad. She closed her eyes hard, sat up, rolled down from the bed and walked to the desk. Books and gadgets are piled on the table, and all the decorations are as clean as before she left home last time. She knows whose responsibility it is, and she also knows the words engraved on the desk. Shen saw it three years ago. Then what kind of mood does he have to wipe it over and over again? Does he want them to be clear as if engraved in his heart? Shen Zhou took down a stack of comic books in the upper left corner, and five crooked words immediately appeared in the fundus, mottled red paint and too deep wood, showing how hard she worked when she was only twelve years old and how resentful she was. At that time, she was a beginner in Lu Xun's articles and admired this stubborn and brave revolutionary pioneer. She imitated Lu Xun's carving of the word "early" and engraved the last sentence in Lu Xun's will: "I am unforgivable!" It rained all day, which made people upset. Shen never smokes in front of his old uncle, so he can't help pulling out one and putting it in his mouth. "When are you going to tell Zhou Zhou?" Xu Zhongguo was the county party secretary of Yunhua, a small county. Although I am retired now, I still have a sense of responsibility. After this great change, he still helped the government to keep order in Yunhua. Shen shook his head: "No way." That's his daughter, his blood! Fifteen-year-old youth, a life that has not yet fully bloomed, is so beautiful, but ... Xu Zhongguo's face has changed, and the sadness from the corner of his eye makes him look ten years older: "I know it's cruel, but now everyone is quitting one after another, and you can't hide it from her for long." "I just want to help her fulfill her wish and let her leave without consciousness and pain." Shen pressed his forehead and said hoarsely, "If I can't do this, I'm not worthy to be her father." Xu Zhongguo said in a low voice, "Send another group of people away, and I will leave. You and Zhou Zhou don't come with me. What shall I tell your parents when I get there? " Shen asked with a wry smile, "We will come after all. But I feel sorry for her. Let me do my father's duty for one more day, and let Zhou Zhou and I be father and daughter for one more day, ok? " You!' The old man turned away from looking at him, but his voice came faintly. "Did Zhou Zhou forgive you?" "How is that possible?" Shen's eyes dimmed. "I betrayed her mother, ruined her home, and ridiculously asked her for justice. Zhou Zhou will never forgive me. " At three o'clock in the morning, Shen Zhou passed by the outhouse and glanced at the pickles, fried dough sticks and egg porridge on the table of Little Eight Immortals. Shen has prepared breakfast, and she has long since stopped eating it. But the smell has the longest memory. The smell of this bowl of egg porridge floated until the first morning of her preschool nine years ago. That day, after eating egg porridge, she wiped her mouth and ran out to sit on the front bumper of the oversized bicycle. She toured the whole campus like a princess and stayed in the kindergarten for a long time. I can't believe this big place is her own from now on. Shen is her escort. While riding, he pointed to it, which was even more exciting than her: "This is the playground, the place for running; This is the teaching building. You should sit quietly in class, or the teacher will be angry. This is the library, and there are many picture books in it ... "Turning behind him, he stopped the car, held Shen Zhou to his chest and asked with a smile," Will you study here in the future? " Shen Zhou remembers nodding his head like a little fool. She curled her lips. At that time, she was always amused by Shen's little moves. What a fool! She can't be so stupid anymore. So she put breakfast on the square table and let them cool. Like every time in the past three years, she moved a small stool and sat under the paulownia tree in the yard, facing the courtyard door, which was the door where her mother left her. Yesterday's rain is still in late autumn. Shen Zhou sat motionless in the depths of this sadness, thinking about that day over and over again. In fact, before the primary school exam, she felt the unusual commotion at home. Shen, who has always loved her, suddenly became grumpy, and her mother, who loves to talk and laugh, is often silent. It was only then that she was too young to find the word "falling apart" in her dictionary full of flowers and birds. Until one morning, when she was still in a daze, she suddenly felt someone sitting by her bed, mumbling something. She struggled to open her eyes, and the original subtle words suddenly turned into crying. Mother Zhou Qingran hugged her and said with tears, "Your father doesn't want us, he doesn't want us." This is the first and last time she saw her mother's tears. Later, Shen gradually recalled that from the discovery of her husband's affair, to the showdown, to the negotiation, and then to the divorce, Zhou Qingran had been very calm, and finally left with an elegant gesture. But the only time she left and lost control with her daughter, her tears fell on Shen Zhou's shoulder, just like Shen's sin was deeply imprinted there, so that she could never forgive her father. In this way, those afternoons that were staggered and gradually fell asleep in Shen's arms are gone; Those days when I took him to school rain or shine will be gone forever. There won't be any fun when Shen and I plan pranks together. Those nights when the family sat together watching Stephen Chow movies and laughed their heads off are gone forever. Shen Zhou forced herself to accept it as calmly as her mother. She went to junior high school, boarded at school, and didn't go home until the New Year. When Shen came to see her, she found various reasons to hide. They only met twice in three years, and this is the third time. This is the last class. When the notice of suspension came, the students were silent, but not surprised. They looked at Shen with deer-like Ming Che's eyes, as if to ask him to say something, say something and make a final farewell. For an instant, Shen even felt that they knew the truth. Yes, who can be more sensitive than children? However, what can he say? More than twenty years ago, like these children, he was full of curiosity and longing for the future. At the prime of his life, he went north to study and was in high spirits. However, young people are always so fragile. The cruelty of reality and a high-low relationship have destroyed his self-esteem and self-confidence. In his hometown where he always recovered, he returned to Yunhua in despair. Gradually, he buried those busy times in the past, abandoned the unique living habits of big cities and began to teach Chinese in a middle school in the town. Later, he met Zhou Qingran; Later, he had Shen Zhou. Time flies, he thinks this is the happiness he wants, but fate always gives him a fatal blow. When former lovers, temptations and ambitions reappear, it is undeniable that he is ready to abandon everything, leave this town and start a new world. But Zhou Qingran walked first. He never imagined that this gentle woman with a smile in her eyes had such a decisive side. She left before him, and her home was destroyed. Shen Zhou had a cold war with him for three years, but he could only stay and make amends. Now, even the sin is irreparable. It's too late. Shen packed his courseware, put on his briefcase and slowly strolled out of the school gate. It was already dark, and he was the last one to leave school. The last person who left the school, together with the elderly doorman, slammed the iron gate. The world is vast, and it seems that another heavy rain is coming. It's not a long way back, but Shen walks slowly. Shen Zhou 15' s birthday is coming. She used to spend her birthdays at school. He knew that every year on that day, Zhou Qingran would visit her, which should be the most anticipated thing for Shen Zhou. But what about this year? What should we do this year? How can he let Zhou Qingran enter this realm and let the family, you, me and him, be together, even if it is only one hour a day? In this way, maybe Shen Zhou can leave without regret, and he can walk away safely. The night fog was so deep that the whole cloud was firmly covered. In the maze, a shrill scream suddenly broke out, which startled Shen. That's the crazy Taoist who's haunting me! He shouted to Shen on the bridge, "This is a cursed dead city. Do you know that?/You know what? Do you know that?/You know what? I'm going crazy. If this continues, I will go crazy. " Shen rushed forward, trying to catch him, and so did the whole county government, the madman who spread rumors and misled people. But when his hand touched the cold arm of the madman, his fearful but persistent eyes in the dark suddenly softened his heart. He let go, let go. After all, no one can measure the distance between truth and lies. After staying at home for a few days, Shen Zhou was a little fidgety. Because Shen doesn't go to work, she stays at home with her every day. No matter how cold and sarcastic she is, she is not angry, but more satisfied with her. She is loved to death by this boring father. If this continues, if one day, she really forgave Shen, what can I do! No, no, Zhou Qing will come to see her soon. How can she compromise at this time? How can she live up to her mother! Shen Zhou began to look forward to resuming classes early every day, but nothing happened. Finally, one day, she couldn't help asking Shen, who was wrapping her book cover, "When will classes resume in your school?" Shen shook his hand and looked up in surprise. "Zhou Zhou, you haven't spoken to your father for a long time." "I asked you when to resume classes." Shen Zhou impatiently don't overdo it. Shen tried to smile naturally: "It should be soon. However, this flu is too powerful, and it is always good to wait. " "What flu!" Shen Zhou's long-suppressed emotions are about to erupt. Everyone told her it was the flu, the flu, but why did she think the whole thing was so weird? She didn't want to go home at all, but this strange anxiety gripped her firmly. She didn't want to admit it, but she had to admit that only around Shen, only around her relatives, would that sense of foreboding be diluted. "Is it really the flu? I think this is a plague. Haven't you noticed? Since the last earthquake, people in the town have died almost every day, and they all died of high fever. There are people absent from class every day in our class. Why didn't the school inform us and drive us home? Is it because we are afraid that we will die in school? " "Zhou Zhou, don't talk nonsense!" Shen put down the book and hugged her. "Even the plague, you have a father! Dad won't let you get sick. " Shen Zhou wanted to hide, but that warm and powerful embrace was what she longed for. She only hesitated for a second, and then she knew she couldn't hide. Her nose is sour and tears are rolling in her eyes. Shen Zhou, Shen Zhou, why are you so timid and useless? A little comfort can keep you warm? A little shelter bought you off? Have you forgotten how cruel this man was when he left you and mom? Have you forgotten how you used to regard him as an almighty god, but he broke your young dream? Have you forgotten what he wrote in the letter to that woman? Shen Zhou suddenly broke Shen's arm and quickly turned and ran out. She running all the way, tears scrambling, like arterial bleeding, how also can't stop. Just like at that time, the night my mother left, she desperately pedaled her bike down the slope, tears and nose mixed together. There is that song in my heart, and I can't stop: "What makes you so infatuated and so presumptuous ..." What makes her dearest father so infatuated with another person and another life, thus hurting her unscrupulously? Little Shen Zhou, how also can't understand the problems of adults. Later, she went home and asked Shen coldly. He said, he even said, "I am a man first, then your father." I have my world, my feelings, my thoughts and my life. I don't just live for you. "Shen Zhou was stunned by the answer. She thought that her father was her father when he was born, and he would always be there like a big stone, never changing or deforming. But she never thought that her father was as naive and grew up as she was, and she never thought about what his love and ideals would be like. This is their biggest quarrel since their mother left. Shen Hong said with eyes open, "Can you be fair to me? "Now is your mother don't you! Not me! " Thirteen-year-old Shen Zhou stood there thinking in despair that she should understand him and forgive him, because the only person who lives with her now is Shen. But she finally gave up, and the charity in Shen Hua made her feel a burden. Shen Jia Jiang Mumu can have a new wife, a new life and even a new child. She is a drag on his father's happiness. So the next day, New Year's Eve, she left home alone and went to school. At this time, Shen Zhou left home again. She sat by the crescent river and looked at the calm river, and her mood gradually calmed down. Somehow, she remembered that extraordinary period. Once she made a little mistake, Shen suddenly flew into a rage and kicked her with her leg. She instinctively covered her ass with her hand. As a result, the kick hit the back of her hand, and immediately, her hand swelled like fermentation, just like steamed bread. Shen changed his face at that time. He picked her up and ran desperately to the county health center. As he ran, he kept blaming himself: "Sorry, Zhou Zhou, does it hurt?" Does it hurt? "She's really in pain. Not long ago, during the earthquake, she escaped in the shaking and was hit by the fallen dormitory door frame, which was also very painful. But the former, because of his father around, the pain soon disappeared; The latter, however, because there are no relatives around, the pain is infinitely magnified and magnified into endless loneliness and emptiness. It turns out that no matter how brave a person is, he will love her and care about the relatives who are with her. Only Shen is left. How can she lose it again? Tears were blown dry by the wind, and Shen Zhou stood up with difficulty. Yes, no matter how far she goes, she always wants to go home. But just then, a crazy Taoist jumped out of nowhere, jumped in front of her and shouted, "Are you Zhou Zhou? "Zhou Zhou are you? Your mother wrote, please keep this letter! " A pale envelope fell at Shen Zhou's feet. It was dark for six days, and the rain really began to pour down. Shen looked everywhere in Yunhua Town, but he didn't find Shen Zhou. He went to the countryside of Xu Zhong with the last glimmer of hope. In just a few days, Xu Zhongguo was old and had started to have a fever, lying in bed waiting for the last moment. "I'm sorry, Jia, can't help you. I tried many ways to contact him and wanted Sang Ni to come in, but I couldn't ... ""Uncle ... "Shen Ben wanted to tell him that Shen Zhou had disappeared, but when he saw him like this, he stopped. Why torture the elderly again? Worrying about him will only make him unable to leave smoothly. "Uncle, I'll give you a ride ..." Shen sat by his bed and held his scrawny hand. The old man devoted his life to the development of Yunhua Town. As a result, a disaster overthrew all his life's efforts, and there would be no one more sad than him. At this moment, Shen can only hold the old man's hand tightly and give him the last warmth. Xu Zhongguo's face was covered with tears, and he slipped through two drops of bright liquid. He choked and said, "Thank you, Jia Mu. But remember, time is running out, get along well with Zhou Zhou, she is just a child, no matter how stubborn, she is just a child. " Yes, she was just a child, but he lost her only child. There was a sharp pain in my heart and I could hardly breathe. At that moment, he suddenly had a premonition that all this was coming to an end. It turns black layer by layer for seven days. It's too thick to melt black. The light is too weak. In the dim light, Shen couldn't see the door clearly, and Shen Zhou's face was deformed by surprise and fear. "Zhou Zhou? You are back! " He greeted him with pleasure. Shen Zhou stepped back with a distorted voice: "Dad, Dad … Dad, I don't understand …" "What don't you understand?" Shen stepped forward, only to find that Shen Zhou was soaked to the skin, holding a pale envelope tightly in his hand, and the blue on it had melted, but he recognized whose handwriting it was at a glance. There was a thunder overhead, and Shen's words were split apart: "Mom, mom, do you still have sincerity and faith?" Where did you get it? " Shen Zhou's face was pale and his lips kept trembling: "I don't understand, Dad, what does Mom mean by another world? What does she mean by the difference between yin and yang? " Thunder rolled over his head one by one, holding his daughter's trembling body and finally coming to this moment. He took a deep breath. He can't hide it. He should always come, but wouldn't it be better if he accompanied his daughter to face it? "Zhou Zhou, Zhou Zhou, let me tell you a story. Don't be afraid, okay? " Shen's comfort has a deep sense of tranquility in the noise of lightning and thunder. Shen Zhou gradually calmed down and nodded his head gently. "Do you remember that earthquake?" "Of course I remember. That night two months ago, I was sleeping soundly and suddenly woke up. They said it was an earthquake and ran out one after another. I followed, but I was hit by a door frame. It hurts. Dad. " Shen lovingly touched her daughter's head: "Don't be afraid, Zhou Zhou." He took a deep breath and gritted his teeth before he had the courage to continue. "Dad is just like you. After the earthquake, all the people in the town were the same. Everyone has gone to another world. Do you understand? " Shen Zhou was silent for a long time, as if trying to digest this sentence. Suddenly, she shivered, looked up suddenly, and her voice changed: "No, it's impossible. The teacher said it was just a small earthquake. " Shen clings to Shen Zhou, feeling her chill seeping into his skin and bones. He could only keep his voice as steady as possible and said word for word: "It was not a slight earthquake at all, but a devastating earthquake of magnitude 7.8." "No, if you say so, why am I still here and everyone is here?" Shen Zhou covered her head and cried. "People in this small town died suddenly in the earthquake. Every one of them must have something they want to do before they have time to do it. These obsessions condense three souls and seven souls, so they can't be ghosts and reincarnated. Can only exist here in the form of life. Until, until, the wish is fulfilled, the obsession is dispersed, and you can leave to be reborn and start over. " "So, when you said that you died of the flu, someone actually fulfilled their wish and left here, and really went to another world?" "yes." Shen stared at Shen Zhou deeply, his eyes penetrated her skin and reached the deepest part of her heart, as if trying to convey her only strength. "Yes, Zhou Zhou." "What about me? Dad ... "Shen Zhou's body suddenly softened and seemed to give up the struggle. She asked tearfully, "Why can't I go?" "Sorry, Zhou Zhou." Shen's tears also fell. "I know you've always wanted to go to that home. I tried many ways to get your mother back on your 15 birthday, and the three of us were reunited, but it was useless. Zhou Zhou, dad can't do it, and the teacher of Yin and Yang can't help you fulfill your wish ... "He put his hand close to Shen Zhou's face and tried to wipe away the tears and rain on her face, but at this moment, Shen Zhou raised his hand to stop him. "I see. No wonder after the earthquake, I felt something was wrong. " She actually smiled, and the laughter was short and sad, but there was a relief in her voice, as if the big stone that had been pressing on her heart suddenly broke. "But, dad, you are a big idiot. You don't know what my wish is.
At midnight, Shen Zhou had a high fever. Shen knew that his daughter had left first. Shen Zhou was lying in bed with bright eyes. She said, "Dad, do you remember when I was five years old? You see, I have trained so hard that I feel extremely distressed. Later, when I said I didn't want to go, you agreed to take me swimming. I thought it would be nice to have such a father! " "Dad, do you remember when I was ten years old, I saw you playing guitar in the yard, and I was so envious? Because you don't play with me, I deliberately said that you didn't play well. In fact, everything you do is better than the fairy. I am proud to have a father like you. " "Dad, do you remember the time when you came to see me at school and I avoided it? Actually, I hid on the balcony. I watched you walk back with a big bag. The sky is blue and the clouds are white every day. The weather was particularly good, but I cried. " "Dad, I used to hate you. But then I figured it out. It's not all your fault. Everyone has the right to pursue the life they want ... ""No, Zhou Zhou, stop it ... "Shen put her face on Shen Zhou's hot forehead and protected her tightly. "Dad, you guessed wrong. Much as I want to go to that home, the past is over. Now I only have one wish, that is, to make peace with you. " "I don't want to be angry anymore. I forgive you. In fact, I was thinking at the moment when I was hit by a door frame during the earthquake. If my father were around to protect me, I wouldn't be afraid. However, you weren't there at that time ... ""So, what you haven't done enough in this life, come back as my father in the next life to make up for it! " "Zhou Zhou ..." Shen Zhou closed his eyes slowly, and a bright tear hung in the corner of his eye, unwilling to fall for a long time. However, after a long time, her body gradually melted like quicksand. This night is too long. Shen pushed open the closed door, and after a storm comes a calm, the first ray of golden sunshine during the day was sprinkled on his sweaty nose. It was so quiet around, he looked at the dust floating quietly in the sun in the distance, and suddenly found that this once prosperous town was almost empty unconsciously. Once obsessed with the vast world, the townspeople left after putting down their obsession or realizing their wishes. The place where they are going should be a brighter and better world! Shen looked up at the bright sunshine and narrowed his burning eyes slightly. At that moment, he felt his head warm up slowly.