Yan Rujing said: "If love is art, then divorce is arithmetic, not an Olympic number."
I'm impressed.
If there is only love between two people who love each other, then it should be very harmonious in the world of men and women. As long as you get through the first month and the second month every day, you will be strong.
However, when men and women meet and fall in love, they always habitually hope that this relationship can have a justified result, and marriage seems to be the best ending for everyone.
As we all know, the warm-up of love for a lifetime is the real beginning of the emotional life of two married people.
In marriage, both husband and wife need to learn many abilities that conflict with their own nature, such as understanding, tolerance, trust and consideration.
More importantly, love is only the bottom of marriage, and life is the truth.
In marriage, you can see a lot of ugliness and meanness when you are in love.
Qinghe was born in a well-off family, and his parents are well-known local corporate executives. Even if it is only an 18th-line town, the living standard is over 80%.
She is the only child in the family, and her parents are afraid of her in their mouths and flying in their hands. From childhood to adulthood, as long as she is willing, as long as she does not violate morality and law, and family conditions permit, her parents will try their best to satisfy her.
Girls who grow up in such an environment have the advantage that they are spiritually enriched and will not grow up in longing and expectation. She is like a carefree canary, only knowing that there are countless beautiful things in the world. The disadvantage is that she has not experienced human suffering, can not perceive the suffering of life, can not get the evil of human nature.
In such a girl's mind, material conditions are the most irrelevant things, and emotional support and singing are the treasures she pursued in the first half of her life.
As we all know, the so-called true feelings must pass the test of life in order to get gold in the sand.
02
After graduating from college, Qinghe decided to travel to big cities.
Fortunately, her target big city is not satisfied with leaving home, which is only a few hours' drive. Her parents reluctantly agreed, but they still often drove to see her. Later, they simply bought her a house and a car there, and they got a fixed destination when they came home from work.
But after working for several years, Qinghe's love life has been blank, and her parents' contacts are in a small town. She doesn't want to go back and can only worry.
Later, I met Hao Bo at work. He is 1.8 meters tall, with bright eyes, and his speech and ability are above Qinghe. Qinghe fell in love with him at first sight.
Men chase women across the mountain; Women chasing men, laminated yarn.
What's more, Haobo is from the countryside, his parents are farmers, and there is a younger brother and a younger sister at home. Being able to send him to college for graduation has exhausted the strength of the whole family, and almost all the money earned in these years has been sent home.
In marriage, it is probably difficult for him to find a local girl in this city, and Qinghe, a foreign girl, has just the right conditions.
Qinghe's parents don't want to know that their daughter has found a boy with such poor conditions, but it happened that her daughter insisted on being with Haobo.
It is useless for parents to worry, so they have to agree to Qinghe with trepidation.
Qinghe and Haobo got married, a veritable "three-zero marriage", with zero room, zero car and zero bride price, and even the money for banquets and wedding photos was paid by Qinghe himself.
Naturally, after marriage, the couple live in Qinghe's house.
Even so, Qinghe is very happy. She thought she was married to love.
Throughout history, girls who marry for love seem to be hurt by love. The man who once said that he would make her happy all her life will eventually hurt her the most.
This is the love between "Phoenix Man" and "Peacock Girl".
03
After marriage, Qinghe knew the difference between love and marriage.
Every day when I open my eyes, there are daily necessities. It used to be "one person has enough to eat, and the whole family has no worries". After marrying Hao Bo, he used almost all his income to subsidize that family.
And Qinghe's salary, with her usual consumption level, is still a little difficult to support two people. Although life is not very tight, she often feels wronged and unfair. Sometimes even when she buys a dress, she has to think about it.
But her parents, who insisted on marrying Haobo because of Qinghe's previous insistence, have been worried. After she got married, she rarely subsidized her. And in order to save face, she didn't want her parents to worry, so she insisted.
In this way, because of the problem of money, there are more and more contradictions between Qinghe and Haobo, and the so-called feelings are becoming more and more fragile.
However, even so, Hao Bo not only failed to think and reflect on the problem, but repeatedly accused Qinghe of spending money lavishly, or asked Qinghe to go back to his parents' house for money.
At first, Qinghe also went back to her parents' home, but parents knew that Haobo's intention was obviously to regard her daughter as a "cash cow", so they rarely gave Qinghe money, hoping that she could see the true face of this man.
However, if you don't get the money, the couple will quarrel.
Later, Haobo went further. He even invited his parents and siblings, and the family lived in Qinghe's house.
I stayed, but there was a lot of friction with Haobo's parents. Qinghe hopes that Haobo will send his family back. Of course, he refused. The quarrel between them became more and more fierce. Finally, Haobo asked Qinghe's parents to buy another suite for their parents to live in, and the problem was solved.
In this way, Qinghe and Haobo returned to their parents' home. Facing their parents-in-law, Haobo said confidently, "Because my parents moved to my house during this time, Qinghe had a lot of trouble with me, and she was too ignorant. We are all family. What are we going to share? I have an idea. You use some money to buy a suite and let my parents live in it, and the problem will be solved. "
For a long time, Qinghe's parents didn't like this son-in-law, so they said so and rejected him.
Haobo was anxious and said, "Don't give me money. Don't come to me after retirement. "
At this time, Qinghe also saw the true face of Haobo. His so-called love was so funny.
With the help of parents, a complaint was filed with the court.
After the Haobo family moved out of that house, they left a cruel word to Qinghe: "There are a few stinky money, which is amazing. That depends on who wants you after the divorce. "
04
In a relationship, it is not terrible to have a problem.
A relationship, failure, is not only the fault of which side.
This failed marriage dealt a great blow to Qinghe. She will fall into self-doubt for a long time and no longer dare to love and be loved.
But her courage to leave this unhealthy marriage is the starting point of her greatest progress and a brand-new beginning.
I believe in the near future, she will definitely redefine love.
However, the future of Haobo is unknown.
Maybe he will meet the woman he secretly loves, but the possibility of repeating the same mistake will be very great.
Because he doesn't know the proper boundaries and sense of boundaries in marriage.
I don't know. Respect in marriage.