Let go of your desire for control, and you will find your child's self-motivation.
Chapter 7 Let children learn to teach themselves.
Self-study ability should be cultivated from an early age
1. Develop reading habits
Children who have no reading habits and can't read are poor students. Reading ability directly affects understanding, so cultivating reading habits is the basis of cultivating self-study ability. It is the key to children's autonomous learning ability.
In primary school, students get good grades, but in senior grades, math problems are even more difficult. Usually these children are children who don't like reading. In the senior stage of primary school, the lack of children's self-study ability will lead to obvious differentiation in learning, and the advantages of children who like reading will become more and more obvious.
Children with strong reading ability can read fast and get more information. Strong ability to capture useful information. Good readers, good writers, and children with strong reading ability have strong understanding. It is convenient to extract and summarize information. Children who don't like reading can't get information through the teacher's teaching at this stage, so it is torture to collect information through reading.
Second, cultivate the habit of independent thinking. The ability to think independently is a necessary condition for independent ability. If you can't think, you can't learn. Independent thinking ability means that when faced with a problem, children will come up with an acceptable answer instead of blindly accepting the ready-made answer.
Third, improve self-control. Self-control is the ability to control emotions, behaviors, attention and mental state according to needs. It is a kind of self-study ability.
Children have no self-control in learning because learning doesn't bring him fun and a sense of accomplishment. Without the ability of active consultation, children can only find pleasure and sense of accomplishment in the ocean of knowledge if they have the ability of self-study. Stimulate internal drive and show strong self-control without the supervision of others.
4. Have the ability of self-inspection. Self-examination ability is an indispensable ability in self-study ability, and self-examination ability is the ability to check mistakes by yourself.
The harm of a daughter's frank communication and improper use of the internet. When children allocate too much time to the online world, it is easy to confuse the difference between the real world and the virtual online world. Children should deal with people more, read more books and communicate more. Only in this way can we have a correct understanding and judgment of the real world.
The author's idea is that besides family education, it is the best way to cultivate children's reading habits and make them fall in love with reading. Most importantly, parents also need to manage themselves and cannot be kidnapped by electronic products.
Chapter 9 time management, making children outstanding.
Here's how to prioritize and handle the priorities.
1. Do something important and urgent at once. It is conducive to reviewing short-term goals and preparing for the next day's exam.
2. Do something important but not urgent. Often related to long-term goals, if you want to learn a foreign language, writing, fitness, reading and so on.
Urgent and unimportant things are decided whether to do it immediately or later according to the situation.
Don't do anything that is neither important nor urgent. For some people, watching Tik Tok and playing games are easy. This is a waste of time. There's no hurry.
Why do children always have a tacit understanding when doing homework?
First of all, parents need to reflect, not because parents arrange their children's time too much. According to the child's actual situation, such as the child's foundation and learning ability, psychologically have a rough timetable, patiently help find and solve problems, and know that children can handle learning problems independently.
Secondly, the reasons for the prolonged psychological time during homework. Each of us has subjective psychological time and objective natural time. Usually, psychology and natural time are out of sync, but when people do what they like, they will experience emotional pleasure. The psychological time will be shortened and the feeling will pass quickly.
When parents urge their children to finish their homework quickly, usually their psychological time will be lengthened, and it is easy to form a wrong judgment on their homework speed. Moreover, using the standards of adults to ask children will also feel that children are slow.
If the child does something he doesn't like, the psychological time will be prolonged in the process of doing it. And will try to divert attention, that is to say, children will unconsciously linger.
Every child's concentration time is different. If the child's concentration time is exceeded, the child's psychological time will be lengthened and his mind will start to wander.
Time is my five basic principles in Amway. The first principle is to give up. The second principle is to do what you can. The third principle is to arrange the study time according to the characteristics of the subject. The fourth principle is to arrange rest time reasonably. The fifth principle is implementation.
If a person wants to change in essence, it must be the internal motivation at work. Parents should focus on how to make their children have the age of time management, rather than urging their children to complete the tasks on the timetable designed by their parents. In the final analysis, every bird's sharing depends on its own wings, and everyone's achievement ultimately depends on its own internal driving force.
What is internal drive? The internal driving force is a tendency to have a motivation to do things, which makes children spontaneously want to be better, even without external requirements and Li Jiang.
That's right. Kind of like I like reading now. I will read consciously without reminding me.
It takes 10000 hours to become an expert in a certain field. If you work eight hours a day and five days a week, it will take at least five years to become an expert in this field. What determines success is persistence and self-motivation. Life is a marathon of self-growth and self-realization.
Cultivate children's honesty, kindness and persistence from an early age. Improving children's survival competitiveness in the future is a preparation for an uncertain future.
This problem-solving oriented family education can not only cultivate children's sense of responsibility, but also cultivate their optimistic and open-minded character, and actively find ways to solve problems when they encounter them, rather than being helpless, not to mention losing their temper and venting their emotions.
Teacher Jiang Xiaoling said that parents should satisfy their children's curiosity and pay attention to stimulating their interest and enthusiasm in learning before school. In primary school, parents should help their children develop good study habits and living habits. With the growth of age, parents should cultivate their children's ability and constantly improve their quality in an all-round way.
The author wants parents to know that in the process of educating their children, comparison can't solve any problems except anxiety. It is the primary task of parents to understand their children correctly, accept them, help them improve their self-control and be their best. If parents are wise, their children will be excellent, so as parents, they should never give up self-learning, let alone self-management. After all, different horizons will lead to different perspectives. Only parents with strong self-management ability can cultivate children with strong self-control.
I have finished reading this book, and I strongly recommend parents and children to read and study this book together. Voice input method, there are some typos, I forgot to change them. In short, if it's basically the author, I just recommend it.