The most popular report for male civil servants and female teachers shows that more than 40% of the women interviewed hope that their ideal partner's career is civil servants, followed by business managers, police/soldiers, business owners, medical workers and so on. This shows that women tend to seek stability in mate selection; 38.3% of the men interviewed hope that their ideal partner is a teacher, followed by civil servants, medical workers, financial accountants and so on. 52. 1% of the men interviewed have no requirements for women's careers. Tian, director-general of the matchmaking industry committee of China Social Work Association, believes that the survey results show that men do not have high requirements for women's careers, and they want their partners to have stable jobs and have relatively ample time to take care of their families. The report shows that there is a big difference between urban men and rural men in agricultural registered permanent residence: only 0.7% of rural women interviewed in agricultural registered permanent residence choose farmers as ideal partners, so it is very difficult for rural men to choose a spouse; Only 3.3% of urban men in agricultural registered permanent residence choose farmers as their ideal partners. Tian said that this shows that rural people (such as migrant workers) who have lived in cities for a long time have been influenced by urban culture, and their views on marriage and love have changed and they are unwilling to marry farmers.
"It is impossible for a man to get married without a house." Among all the criteria for choosing a spouse, apart from morality and temperament, what men and women value most is "emotional input". The biggest difference between "leftover men" and "leftover women" is that when choosing a spouse, men mainly pursue women's appearance and don't pay much attention to their work ability; Women mainly pursue men's economic strength and working ability. Specifically, 70% of the women interviewed believe that men can only get married if they have a house, a stable income and some savings. Among them, about 65% of women want men's income to be more than 1 times of their own, while more than 63% of men have low demands on women's income. In addition, nearly 30% of unmarried women find it difficult to accept the notarization of premarital property; More than 30% of the women interviewed advocate that "men pay for marriage" or "men have big heads and women have small heads"; On the issue of marital property disposal, men prefer the AA system of family finance, while 53.2% of the respondents agree that the wife has the power of family finance. Sociologist Li Yinhe believes that some women are psychologically fragile and take it for granted that men buy houses. This is a typical feudal concept, which is inconsistent with the independent spirit of women advocated by modern society. As the executor of this survey, Wang Zhiguo, an expert on marriage and love, pointed out that there are obvious misunderstandings in the expectations of single people in choosing a spouse, and the "misplacement of expectations" has affected people's behavior in choosing a spouse. The report reflects that in the current marriage, many women regard marriage as a kind of social security. The new marriage law "Draft for Comment" published not long ago is impacting the distorted views on marriage and love such as "having money" and "the house is more reliable than men".
Age is cruel to women. The report shows that the pressure of women's mate selection mainly comes from men's requirements for women's age. Over 90% of men think that women should get married before the age of 27, and about 32% of men think that best age for marriage is 20-24 years old. It can be seen that age is quite cruel to women's mate selection. In addition, more than 50% of women believe that the best age for marriage of men is 28-30 years old. The report pointed out that men in this age group have worked for a certain period of time, their careers are relatively stable and they have certain economic strength, indicating that women are more willing to marry mature men.
The report "Fate of Parents" shows that 23.8% of single people's parents are helping them find a partner everywhere, but they just can't find a suitable one. The report also shows that the "post-80s" are more obedient to their parents' opinions in choosing a spouse, and broke up with their lovers because of their parents' opposition. Jiang Yongping, a professor at the Women's Institute of the All-China Women's Federation, said that this shows that on the one hand, most of the only children born in the 1980s are not yet financially independent, and they are more dependent on their parents, which directly leads them to have to accept their parents' opinions when choosing a spouse. Most "leftover men and women" said in interviews that they need to receive various forms of marriage guidance and help. They think that the main reason for being single is that the social circle is too narrow and not active enough, and their feelings are hurt and they don't know how to get along with the opposite sex. "Respondents generally hope to get marriage counseling and guidance from marriage and family counselors, and help them expand their social circle and learn how to choose a spouse actively by holding various forms of love training classes, blind date activities, marriage counseling, etc. This shows that the matchmaking market in China has great potential. " Tian said to him.
Career choice: women choose men: civil servants, business managers, police/soldiers, business owners, medical workers ... Men choose women: teachers, civil servants, medical workers, financial accounting ...
Single reasons ■ The social circle is too narrow ■ Not active enough ■ The feelings are hurt ■ I don't know how to get along with the opposite sex.
See what level you have left. The 25-27-year-old fighter junior girl still has the courage to continue fighting for her partner. Therefore, they are called "leftover fighters" (saints). At the age of 28-30, they must have left intermediate leftover women. There are not many opportunities for them at this time, and there is no time to look for them because of professional reasons. The nickname is Pizza Hut 3 1 ~. Survived the brutal workplace struggle, and is still single, and is honored as the "Buddha against Buddha" (anti-Buddha). At the age of 35, she is a super leftover woman. She is honored as "Monkey King" (Monkey King). She has a mansion, a private car and a company. Why did she become a leftover woman?
It is important to know yourself correctly. Yan Huang (pseudonym) is 35 years old and keeps a good figure. She looks less than 30 years old. She has two companies of her own in Nanning, living in a mansion and owning a private car. Although she has good conditions, she is still single. Last month, anxious Yan Huang went to consult a psychologist. Yan Huang complained, "What's wrong with me? I am so good, why is no one interested in me? " The counselor said that Yan Huang made many mistakes that leftover men and women often make. One is that I don't know myself well enough, and the other is that I'm not ready for the role change. The so-called cognitive deficiency, such as career-oriented and expert-oriented women, is often regarded as excellent women, but whether a person is excellent or not will lead to completely different results from different angles. A woman who is excellent in her studies and career is not necessarily excellent if she is measured by the standards of being a good wife and mother and taking care of her husband and children. A family-oriented man may not be successful in his career, but from the perspective of a good husband, he is not necessarily not excellent. So the leftover men and women should pay attention. First of all, they should know what their shortcomings are, constantly improve themselves and change their roles again as soon as possible. Successful men and women should strive to meet the standards of a good husband and wife.
Leftovers become a kind of entertainment? I don't know when dating programs on TV became quite popular. Just to name a few, Jiangsu Satellite TV's If You Are the One, Hunan Satellite TV's Let's Date, and Shandong Satellite TV's Knocking on the Door all earned enough ratings. On the one hand, they may have made some contributions to solving the problem of "leftover men and women" of single men and women, but the author found from similar programs that for some reason, "leftover men and women" seem to have no lack of entertainment mentality, such as Mano's famous saying that "I would rather cry in a BMW than laugh on a bicycle", for example, Zhu Zhenfang explicitly stated that he wanted to own a luxury house to "improve the living conditions of himself and his family", such as being like a "saver". There are also "10,000-person blind date", "multi-millionaire special blind date" and other popular activities all over the country. It seems that these leftover men and women are not looking for lifelong partners, but a kind of fun. For the above phenomenon, some media reporters surveyed people of all ages and came to the general view of "forgive and disagree"-it seems that if you really want to find someone to marry, you must first put the concept of choosing a spouse right.