7. Have Einstein's brain instead of Newton's.
What's the difference between them? Newton can't see time, Einstein has the concept of time in his mind, which is a four-dimensional view, equal to three-dimensional plus time, equal to emphasizing time, and time is space.
The people who came to class last time are different from the people now, and the changes are timely. Your eyes obviously want to see the time.
For example, when the consultant comes, you ask, how about this time? He said it was the same. You say, what is the same? Last time you came, you wore a purple down jacket, and this time you wore a white down jacket. Like what? He said nothing.
I said you've changed because I remember your past. Only by recalling your past can I see you today. This time is a feeling and a kind of love.
If your consultant comes in and tells you that the winter jasmine in your yard is in bloom, you can tell him not to consult again, and it is a waste of money to consult again. Because he saw the blooming winter jasmine.
When a job seeker comes to you, don't be vague. He has changed. Your task is to help him find out where he has changed.
? I have changed a lot since a week ago. This is the change of time.
? As long as this person sits in front of you, you must first believe that he has changed. Your task is to help him find out what has changed, especially what has become better.
This is especially important, so be sure to take time with you.
? 8. Let go of your causal thinking and pick it up.
In the humanistic world, there is a cause and there is a result. In the psychological world, there is a cause and effect, or cause and effect coexist.
If a person is late, you will find an excuse for being late. What is the reason? You found it. First there is the result, then there is the reason.
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A successful person will certainly find out the reason for his success. Do everything possible to make cause and effect simultaneous. Never trust a helper to find out why he failed. When he finds out the reason, he should know that a fruit is composed of multiple reasons. He found one, and n more. We should help him find out the reason of "n minus 1", provided that he can't recognize that reason.
If I ask you why you caught a cold, you said you caught a cold when you went to Pingdu yesterday. Any disease has three factors, biological, psychological and social. Why do you catch a cold? First of all, biological factors are different, that is, people say different constitutions. In addition, psychological differences, such as stress, busy work and low immunity, are also easy to turn into symptoms. Then there are social factors. Usually you can only find one factor, and we have to help you find the other two factors. Single attribution is a very easy mistake.
The most basic thing is the necessary and sufficient condition. Where there is a, there must be b, and a is a sufficient condition for b; Without a, there is no B. A is a necessary condition for B. Many people in life often take sufficient conditions as a necessary condition. For example, I suffer because I have no money. The logic behind him is that if you have money, you will be happy. People who commit suicide by jumping off a building are not poor. Are all the people who committed suicide by jumping off a building poor? Give him subversion and reverse the logical relationship behind him.
James said that a person does not cry because of sadness, but because of tears. A Japanese psychologist said that a child can't learn well not because he is tired of learning, but because he is tired of learning badly. Similarly, a person does not have psychological problems because of internet addiction, but first because of psychological problems.
The problem is difficult not because it is too difficult to solve, but because it cannot be solved. When this problem can't be solved, it's not because you are stupid, but because your way of thinking has solidified. We should turn the result into the cause.
For example, if a person suffers from depression, the doctor will think, what causes him to suffer from depression? Why do you get depression? Psychologists will think, he has depression, what do you want to achieve? Why are you depressed? For and against, different.
People commit suicide in order to achieve control and help them find a purpose.
9. The counselor is selling time.
? Doctors sell medicine, and our counselors sell time. What is successful psychological counseling? As long as he pays, it will be a successful psychological consultation.
10. Psychological counseling is one of the ways to help people solve their psychological problems, not the only way.
There are n ways to solve a person's psychological problems. Never be narcissistic. There are many ways to solve psychological problems. Ta should be encouraged to find other ways.
For example, the lovelorn young man was cured by the aunt of the neighborhood Committee who introduced him to his girlfriend. It matters not what someone is born but what they grow to be. You can't stick to traditional things.
Remember these ten ideas first and use them to guide your future life and consultation.
? (2020.5. 15)