Sister Zhang is a divorced woman. When she was young, she married a young man from Hunan despite her parents' objections. The young man doesn't have much money, but he is considerate of her and makes her feel in love.
Her parents didn't agree with her to marry in Hunan, so she found an object in the county, hoping that she could marry in the county and go back to her parents' home even if she was wronged. If she was wronged when she married Hunan, her family didn't know.
But Jason was only in his twenties at that time, and thought that marriage with love was the best, so Jason totally ignored his parents' dissuasion and wanted to combine with young men in Hunan. She even stole her parents' household registration book one night and secretly married a young man.
After marriage, young men have been very kind to Jason, but their families are really poor, and their parents are disabled, and they have lost their basic working ability. They can only do simple farm work in rural families and can't give any financial subsidies to new families.
After marriage, Jason went to Guangdong to work with young men. They live in a narrow rural house in a village in Guangdong, and their life is very sweet. At that time, Sister Zhang thought that we could strive for a better future with hard-working hands, just like a little girl in love, thinking that love is beautiful.
After two years of marriage, Jason gave birth to a son, and the family economy suddenly became tense. In particular, my parents-in-law are old, they come up when they are ill, and they are often ill and hospitalized. Sister Zhang was helpless and finally tasted the distress of having no money after marriage. In desperation, Jason had the cheek to ask her mother-in-law for help with the children (her parents are disabled and can't take care of them). Her family naturally sympathizes with her daughter. Although she complains about her daughter in various ways, she is more worried about her daughter.
So she promised to help her daughter take care of the children. After that, Jason and the young men lived a hard life in Shenzhen, and the married days began to be less sweet. Because of economic reasons, they quarreled many times. Jason felt left out and cried in the middle of the night.
Another sad thing is that Jason, who is married far away, has realized that she is married far away without her parents and has nothing to say. Sister Zhang began to understand that the marriage without bread made her feel the pain of poor couples mourning for a hundred days. Rice, salt, oil, sauce, vinegar and tea all cost money. Later, Jason quarreled with young men more and more frequently, and the contradiction gradually intensified.
In the end, Jason and her husband ended in divorce. Jason is now a divorced woman. Jason's marriage started with sweet love, but ended in misery. She used her tragic experience to warn all unmarried men and women that they must see these four aspects clearly before getting married:
1, depending on the quality of men
Before marriage, the most important thing is to look at the quality of the man. Because the remaining 99% of your time after marriage is spent with men around you, the quality of men directly determines your happiness after marriage. A filial, self-motivated, responsible and family-loving man is what every woman wants to meet. If the man's quality is selfish, violent and regardless of family, then most of such marriages will end in tragedy.
And if you marry such a man, no matter how rich his family is, it can't give you a bright future, and all the happiness before marriage is just a flash in the pan. What about the quality of the man? Generally speaking, filial and caring men are more responsible and take care of their families; A man who is self-motivated and enterprising may be a potential stock and may bring a rich life to his family in the future.
2. Look at the man's family economic situation.
The second is the economic situation of the man's family. Some people say I worship money, but that's true. The economic situation of the man's family is a very important measure to measure whether you are happy after marriage. As the old saying goes, poor couples mourn for a hundred days.
90% of quarrels between married couples are due to family financial pressure. Experienced people tell you that the economic situation of the man's family directly determines the quality of marriage. I hope the man you are looking for is a well-off family. For example, like me, the family I was looking for was poor, and then I quarreled countless times because of family economic reasons, and finally the relationship between husband and wife ended in divorce. As an experienced person, Sister Zhang told you to be pragmatic. This is not money worship but protection.
Step 3 meet the parents of the man's family
Marrying a man's family depends on the faces of his mother-in-law and father-in-law. After all, after marriage, you are an outsider and enter a brand-new family. If your parents-in-law don't accept you and even take it out on you everywhere, then your marriage must be unhappy. Because your other half will be caught between you and your parents, he will feel very uncomfortable and family conflicts will gradually emerge.
There is an old saying that a daughter-in-law and a mother-in-law are always enemies. This is the experience of an experienced person. For example, my mother-in-law and father-in-law are disabled, and she can't give any financial assistance to our family at all. Moreover, because they are disabled and somewhat withdrawn, there have been many quarrels between my father-in-law and me, which is also one of the reasons for the intensification of our husband and wife contradictions.
4. See clearly the customs and cultural differences between the two places.
I especially don't recommend you to marry far away. That's what I suffered. It's really hard to marry a woman who lives far away. If the husband's family doesn't have enough financial security, most women who marry far away end up in tragedy. When I first went to Hunan, I couldn't accept the food culture and customs there at all, so I had a lot of quarrels with my husband. My parents-in-law also thought I was a very picky person, and we blamed each other, which eventually led to the breakdown of our marriage. So before you get married, you must see clearly whether you can accept the differences between the customs and cultures of the two places. Sister Zhang has been there before. You must remember this.
The above four points are Jason's advice to all unmarried men and women as a divorced woman, which will be an important benchmark to determine the quality of marriage. I hope that every man and woman can find the object they like, and that every marriage can be happy and harmonious, and don't follow Jason's footsteps.
What do you think of this? Please leave a comment.