Perhaps the experience of getting out of depression is different, and mine is not representative. But I'd better share my experience, which may be useful to some friends.
That year, because I couldn't stand the leader's grumpy personality, I resigned and didn't know where the future was. I recalled that my job was extremely painful and my life was meaningless. I stayed at home for a month, drinking tea alone, and gradually became more and more serious, insomnia, unexplained chest pain, rhinitis and weight loss. I live in all kinds of painful torture every day, and I feel the whole world is like a hell every day.
After that, I went to the psychological department of the hospital and was seriously depressed. The doctor prescribed antidepressants, and after taking them for a day, he felt dizzy and nauseous, so he stopped taking them himself. Decided to come out through their own efforts.
What follows is really an arduous battle, which is really no exaggeration. I have tried everything, traveling, exercising, being a vegetarian, taking a hot bath, forcing myself to socialize, seeking psychological counseling, studying psychology, Buddhism, meditation and so on. I have used all the methods I can think of. Some methods may not be suitable for me, so I gave up slowly. Some methods have been tried many times before finding some effect, such as psychological counseling. At first, the counselor felt bad, so change! Not yet, change another one! Travel is the same, sometimes useful, sometimes it feels meaningless ... all kinds of repetition.
Later, perhaps it was a comprehensive effect, and I slowly found a way that suited me and came out.
Looking back now, I feel that getting out of depression is actually a systematic project. You have to try slowly, experience many failures and despair after many failures, and you have to get up and keep trying ... until you know yourself better. ...
I think meditation and psychology are the most important things, just like the frame of a house, while traveling, taking a hot bath, reading and socializing, just like the outer walls, windows and roofs ... together, these things become a home that can shelter from the wind and rain and protect themselves from depression.
This is my own experience. Now I would rather say that I am out of depression than over-depression, because when we suffer from depression, depression is integrated with us. It is the cry that our life is stuck at a certain point. We need to know ourselves, listen to ourselves and shake hands with ourselves, and then the depression will naturally disappear.
I hope this experience is useful to you. If you are suffering from depression, I wish you a speedy recovery. If you have a desire for psychological counseling, you can trust me privately-Mr. Shu Dong, a psychological counselor who has come out of depression.
He Hui (a pseudonym) is a smart woman with a good face. She is 36 years old and has been married for 10 years. She is the mother of two children. She was sent to psychological counseling by her husband Zhang Ming (a pseudonym) because of depression for 8 years.
When she first came to the counseling room, she was very sad, weak, pale and stiff. Her body shrank into a small ball and looked stiff and cold. Before the consultation, when filling in the visiting registration form and consulting confidentiality agreement, she could not complete it independently and needed her husband's assistance and guidance. She seems to have exhausted all her energy and it is difficult for her to interact with the outside world normally.
(PS: The case has been authorized by the parties in writing, and their personal information has been technically processed)
In consultation, she used to take a self-protective posture, with her arms on her chest and the whole person curled up in a corner of the sofa. She cried most of the time and told me something about her life intermittently. She has repeatedly said that she has no hope of improving her situation, and she can't trust anyone. She often suffers from insomnia all night. In order to fall asleep, she will take some sleeping pills, but now it seems that the pills are becoming less and less effective. This deepened her sense of despair.
At present, she is still working as a logistics staff in a hospital. Objectively speaking, she is very suitable for this job. But from her subjective point of view, she feels overwhelmed, underestimates her working ability and often wants to resign. But her colleagues and husbands often advise her to continue working, so that her work can continue. At the same time, because it is difficult to ensure that she can devote enough energy to her family and work, she often feels inferior and guilty.
Although her looks and abilities have been recognized by many people, her self-esteem is always in a state of fluctuation. Occasionally, she has a moderate sense of self-worth, but more often, she feels self-loathing and guilty, and she even hurts herself, such as beating, pulling and cutting. Behind her self-loathing is a sense of abandonment and anxiety. Sometimes thinking of death (suicide) will make the mind feel a little calm and relieved.
In the first consultation, I learned something about her early years and her family background: she is an only child with good family conditions. Her father is the manager of a company. She is a very rational person and pays great attention to her grades. Her mother's personality structure is depressed, and her husband's derailment during pregnancy leads to postpartum depression, and she has the idea of not wanting this child (He Hui) during pregnancy.
Her husband's affair brought a traumatic experience to He Hui's mother, which affected her self-confidence as a woman and confidence in life, so she could not convey warm love and positive feelings to her daughter, as well as positive attitudes and values towards herself and the world. On the contrary, what my daughter has been experiencing is indifference, abandonment and existential anxiety.
He Hui has a good relationship with her father, who attaches great importance to her future and has high expectations for this daughter. He often rewards her, but at the same time he demands a lot from her. Therefore, this kind of interaction is not enough to enhance He Hui's sense of self-worth. He Hui's father can't understand the depression of his wife and daughter. He believes that willpower can overcome everything, and there is nothing impossible to think about.
He Hui's husband and her father have similar attitudes. It is difficult for him to understand his wife's depression. He thinks this is because she is spoiled, and her depression is a sign of weakness and incompetence. Her husband's attitude and accusations aggravated her inferiority and guilt. She felt that she was too fragile, dragged down her family, brought trouble to others and fell into deeper depression.
So in the last 15 minutes of consultation, I had a simple communication with her husband Zhang Ming about He Hui's situation, so that he could have a deeper understanding of depression and help his wife recover in a more effective way. Zhang Ming realized that his past education and criticism of his wife not only did not help her improve her condition, but increased her psychological burden. He is willing to try the counselor's proposal, give her more understanding and emotional support, and make her feel that no matter whether I am good or bad, excellent or bad, I am loved.
Like most of my patients with depression, when discussing the counseling program, He Hui did not express her expectation for counseling, nor did she say whether she could consult again. She doesn't even believe that she can improve, that is, she has lost confidence in life. I expressed my understanding and encouragement: "Your life is experiencing a great emotional depression, just like falling into a dark abyss. I can't see the sunshine in front of me, I can't feel my own value, I have no hope for life, work and symptoms, but I feel powerlessness, helplessness, inferiority, self-blame, and even thought about giving up on myself. However, falling to the deepest trough means the arrival of the recovery stage! You can come to consult, which is a positive improvement behavior and a ray of sunshine in life. You have done a good job! I invite you to continue walking. Let's go to more sunny places together and go to places where you want to have a living state most. " (Remarks: The second consultation with her came as scheduled. She persisted in consulting for half a year until her early wounds healed and she rebuilt herself, so that she could better face herself and the external environment. )
Long-term severe depression is mostly caused by trauma in the attachment relationship with parents in the early years, such as the relationship between mother and baby. Babies can't see love and intimacy in the eyes of their mothers, and there are few pleasant feelings in the interaction between mother and baby, which is one of the soils of depression. The day after tomorrow, you may fall into depression due to emotional failure, work frustration and other incentives, or you may feel pain for a long time without external reasons. However, a person with a healthy and happy mother-child relationship may suffer the same setbacks and lose pain, but will not continue to fall into depression. He Hui's case is a typical example. She has already felt the value of not living in the fetus. Under the care of depressed mothers, the attachment relationship between mother and baby is not good, and she will absorb her mother's depressed state and form a depressed personality.
For depressed patients trapped in the dark, I will slowly guide them to see the sunshine, first use one or two dim lights, and then expand and improve the brightness, so that their life energy channel will change from negative to positive unconsciously. When I asked He Hui to find something interesting to do, she couldn't find it. Later, she went to buy a pot of little green radish and went home to finish my homework. I asked her to take good care of this plant, talk to the green radish every day and tell its owner that she hopes it will grow healthily. A week later, the green radish began to grow some small green leaves, which made He Hui very moved and made him feel that there was still a glimmer of life. After that, we discussed some topics, such as the advantages of He Hui, the reasons why relatives, husbands and friends love her, her abilities, specialties, hobbies, and the moments that make her feel love in life ... After each discussion, I observed that He Hui's expression would relax and her eyes would appear brighter.
Regarding the trauma of attachment, I use hypnosis to deal with it. Back to the earliest days when she lived with He Hui, when she crossed the previous visit and went back to her mother's stomach, she felt inexplicable fear and cold. Under my guidance, she heard a strong quarrel between her parents. Dad slammed the door and left. Mother cried and said, "Your father is so cruel to me, how can I live?" What is the significance of your coming to this world at this time? If you come, you will suffer. You'd better not come! "
Under my guidance, the "fetus" expressed its sincerity: "Mom, it hurts me to see you in such pain. I came here with curiosity and exploration of this new world. I hope I am popular and my family is warm and harmonious. I'm afraid to see you like this. I'm afraid you don't want me and hate me. I'm afraid what greeted me was an unhappy childhood and life. I'm afraid I'm a worthless person ... "He Hui burst into tears and finally had an outlet to express her pent-up feelings for more than 30 years. Then, walking forward to infancy, He Hui saw that she was hungry for a long time, crying blue, having no food and no one to take care of herself. She felt the indifference of the world and her humbleness. I guided her to express her feelings and needs, and then asked her to find her mother. She found that her mother had insomnia during that time. She takes sleeping pills in the middle of the night, falls asleep in the morning, and can't hear the baby crying. When mom woke up, He Hui saw that she was making milk powder with remorse, and He Hui felt a little warm in her heart. When she woke up from hypnosis, the feedback said that she had more understanding and love for her mother and less resentment, and felt that her mother was also quite pitiful.
In the process of getting along with my mother, He Hui absorbed her depressed energy, and I did a series of treatments with exhausted psychological technology. Under my guidance, He Hui expressed her mother's depression and the influence of bad relationship with her parents. She expressed many feelings buried in her heart, including sadness, anxiety, weakness and anger. When she played the role of mother, she felt her mother's deep guilt and powerlessness. The "mother" apologized to her daughter and told her that her parents loved her only because of her emotional problems, including when she was pregnant, not because she wanted to abandon her, but because she was worried about the broken family. She sincerely hopes that the children can live happily and not be influenced by her. The daughter accepted her mother's apology and gave it back to her mother. She was relieved to know that her mother loved her. Then, I guided He Hui to an energy separation ceremony: He Hui saw in the image that the repressed energy in her body floated like black smoke and returned to the field of "mother". He Hui said to "Mom": "Depression is a part of you, and I have decided to be myself. I have decided to live without your depression in the future. It is your decision whether to leave depression or not, mom, and I will bless you. " After such treatment, He Hui happily held my hand and said that she felt that she could be reborn!
In order to repair and rebuild the attachment relationship and enhance her inner strength, I arranged a series of follow-up treatments. I guided her to play the role of a perfect mother, and used "what's good for the fetus" and "what's good for the baby" to interact in love and repair her unsatisfied love needs in her early years. When He Hui saw that the fetus and baby's bodies were getting warmer, they all showed happy smiles, and He Hui left moving tears. ...
After half a year's consultation, He Hui is a brand-new person at this time: well-dressed, with bright eyes and a smile on her mouth. She told me that she had a life that she didn't dare to think about before, step by step, and it was strange why she had never found it in the past. I know that she is not the other party at this time, and I thank her for giving me an opportunity to accompany her along the way, and I wish her a happy life in the future!
Your question is how to overcome depression.
This is a very good question.
Personally, I think, whether it is depression, bipolar disorder or anxiety. These are all ideas! Which is delusion.
Our brain has a memory bank! It's in the memory bank. It keeps showing some images. Project some images. What are these images? This is what you think now. If you stick to the next idea, you will follow it! You must take action. You have to understand, all the ideas, as long as you chase them. It is necessary to have feelings of anger, sadness and sadness, and then it is necessary to put them into action …
When you know these thoughts, they are just your wishful thinking, and you don't follow them. Can't be fooled! Stay away from everything, it is your heart, it is your own childlike heart!
When you know, all your knowledge and awareness are illusions! In other words, these fantasies will be seen through by you, and now they can't fool you!
Everyone has heard of it, right? It's still a case-solving if the ship moves! What is the purpose of this case? Is to wake you up! Let you realize! Sober you up. Not the wind, not the flapping, not the boat! It is your heart that is separating. He is telling you that when you see everything, you can't separate it with selfless heart.
Forgetting is true, knowing illusion is false. Facing the current thinking, it is completely different! Completely unfocused. What depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder! Away from you.
Of course! Regulate this body and mind. Sometimes there will be four major imbalances in this body! Such as anger and anger. Liver depression. Oh, wait! Not feeling well. Will affect the mood. Let's say this heart fire, if the fire enters the heart! It is difficult for this person to control his emotions! So go ahead! If you feel unwell, it is also important to see a regular doctor (Chinese medicine, western medicine) in time!
The above is my answer to your question! I hope it helps you. I wish you a happy body and mind and good health.
Depression will appear more and more easily in this economic society, because with the development of economy, people's inner world is becoming more and more fragile, and there is not enough time and experience to exercise themselves more strongly. And many people develop in big cities to realize their ideals. On this ideal road, sometimes it is easy to feel lonely if you are not understood by others.
In big cities, many of us are surrounded by ourselves and have no relatives. Relatives are scattered in different corners, and everyone has their own way of life development. Unlike the previous farming society, everyone farmed at home for generations. Many people will leave their homes, work outside and fight for their ideals.
On the road of struggle, various factors, such as house, car, marriage, interpersonal relationship, worldly wisdom, overtime and so on, made me deeply involved. The limitation of people is that they always stay in a circle and don't know how beautiful the outside world is. But if you can't change yourself, it's hard to change.