Silence refers to the phenomenon that when the helper needs to explore and answer questions, the helper stops answering and exploring, which hinders the smooth consultation. It is the most active resistance of individuals to psychological counseling. ?
Type:
(1), skeptical. Because visitors don't fully trust the consultant, don't tell some information or are still hesitating, they often show an uneasy look and look at the consultant with suspicion and inquiry.
(2) Vacancy type. Some visitors don't know what to say, what the counselor wants to know, and what the important narrative content is; Sometimes the helper can't figure out what the problem is, so he can't express it or can't express it clearly; Or want to express a lot of things, but I don't know where to start, and I am in a state of silence for a while. At this time, the eyes of the helper are often vacillating and contain the color of inquiry.
(3) emotional type. They may be caused by emotions, such as anger, fear, shame and so on. For example, visitors are afraid of something, such as talking about a topic they don't want to talk about. The silence at this time expressed such a message: "I don't want to talk about this topic" and "I don't want to stay here".
Help-seekers may also be very ashamed to talk about or recall what they did wrong in the past. He uses silence to avoid it. At this time, he may avoid eye contact with the counselor, keep his head down, and sometimes his hands and feet will keep moving. When visitors are angry with consultants, they may also use silence to convey this message. In addition, they may stare at the counselor and look around angrily.
(4), thinking. At this point, the helper is repeatedly understanding what the counselor said and seems to be aware of something; Or he is recalling something of great significance to the consultation; Maybe he is experiencing some kind of emotion or feeling. That is, the visitor's silence at this time is due to his active self-exploration. In action, he may open his eyes and think hard, or he may narrow his eyes and talk to himself. Gazing at a certain point in space is often regarded as a symbolic act of this silence.
(5) Introversion. This kind of silence stems from the personality reasons of visitors, such as introversion and poor speech. Silence is his regular way of communicating with people, especially in strange environments and crowds. Such a person is often silent when consulting, even if he has something to say. Maybe he had thought over what to say before his visit, but when he arrived at the inquiry site, he probably couldn't say it, and he would be embarrassed and quite upset.
(6) Rebellion, that is, visitors are unwilling to talk about it. Here mainly refers to those who passively ask for help. They are unwilling or unwilling to receive counseling, and others want them to come, so they use silence to show their attitude. Silence is accompanied by doubt, indifference, arbitrariness, impatience and even anger and hostility.
The appearance of silence will make the consultation temporarily impossible, which will lead to nervousness, depression and embarrassment. Only the fourth situation is constructive. In this regard, consultants should take active and effective measures according to different situations. The most important thing is to establish a good consulting relationship and improve interview skills.