Many people will think: as long as I do a lot of things and make some achievements, it is not a waste.
Maybe that's not enough. Maybe we should do better. For example, we should realize that thing called "dream", then marry the person we like, have one or two children, and bring them up happily.
This can be said to be the dream of countless young people. Many people think so, and think it is worthwhile to do so all their lives.
Strickland, the hero of The Moon and Sixpence, may be such a young man. He also worked hard to grow into a securities broker, married a noble woman in the upper class of England and gave birth to two lovely children. However, at the age of forty, he left a stable life and left no money for his wife and children. He is determined to go to Paris to paint, to find the "moon" in his heart, and never come back until he dies.
He left even though everyone envied his life. Why? Because he is not satisfied with it.
If even worldly success will make people regret it, how can we live a good life without regret?
Perhaps, we also need a "moon" in our hearts, even if we have no choice to leave in the end.
The Moon and Sixpence was written in 19 19, and the story took place in England. But in the 20th century, countless realistic versions of strickland appeared in China, but they didn't really run away.
There is a question in Zhihu: Are most men at the age of 40 living a boring life?
The highest vote answer, chaotic coconut king said this:
Yes
Not only is it boring, but it doesn't look forward.
When men are young, all the goals are actually only planned to be 40 years old.
What should have been achieved before the age of 40 has been achieved.
If you can't achieve it, you know it's impossible in this life.
All that remains is inexhaustible money, rice, oil and salt.
Everyone around you crawls all over you like leeches, desperately sucking men's blood.
Only output, no input.
16K people liked it.
But why is this? A friend named Chen Dazhuang thinks:
This game of dead chess has been laid out since a person was born, and at the age of 40, he finally found himself unable to break free.
Listen to your parents when you study, go to this school and that school, don't fall in love, and have no hobbies; After graduation, some people with good conditions still follow their parents' arrangement and enter a certain unit, while those with poor conditions are limited by their life/education/contacts to do a certain job; After work, I listened to my parents or others, found a blind date according to my own conditions, and gave birth to a baby.
Finally, by the age of forty, you have done almost everything your parents and other elders arranged for you. It's time to live for yourself, but the concept of living for yourself seems strange and I don't know what to do.
So yes, most people will still be alive at the age of 40, which is very boring, because he never knows what it means to be alive.
These real-life Mr. strickland, they don't want to live like this. They didn't "run away", but they didn't want to live like this. They have a lot of helplessness:
Ambition has not yet been realized, but I dare not jump ship. If no one appreciates it, who wants to jump ship? Almost all job advertisements are only under the age of 35; Start a business? What if I can't get my child's school choice fee? What if the old man is ill? Forget it, just mix peacefully, as long as you don't get eliminated. Always be a silent listener when attending a friend's party, or never want to attend a class reunion again. I want to work hard, but I can't.
Life is just a repetition day after day: going to work, handing in reports, reporting work, pleasing leaders and customers; After work, he buys food and cooks, and helps children with tutoring; My wife and I have nothing to say and dare not speak. I'm afraid talking will only make her worry; All the elders around me died one by one, and they were lonely. Although they have a home, they seem to have no friends ... life seems to have entered a dark tunnel, and I don't know when it will end.
What scares them even more is that even if they survive, there seems to be no light and hope waiting for them at the end of the road. The expected aging is coming, and they are just waiting for death for the rest of their lives. Hopeless life, day after day, exhausted all their vitality, extremely painful, but at a loss.
If life doesn't break through here, it will stay here.
How can we break through the tight encirclement and find a bright road?
How do those who break through the encirclement do it?
Zhihu's question has some high-vote answers, but all of them are full of positive energy. They said, "My forty years old is very interesting!" Some people even said, "My life has just begun!"
Why are they different from others? This is because most of them look forward to doing what they want to do every day.
Some of them are engaged in technical work such as surgeons, architects, psychological counselors, researchers and software engineers, while others are engaged in business and politics. At the age of 40, their careers are mature and they are full of expectations for the next life. Others are leaders in all walks of life. They have successfully found what they want to do. Some of them are just starting businesses and are in the process of forming teams, such as planning to do a big job in the AI field. Finally, some of them have at least one personal hobby that they like very much, and they are very satisfied, because they finally have a lot of time to play their personal hobbies when they are forty years old.
No matter how big or small, whether they plan to be ordinary or start the next glory, there is always one thing they really want to do, and they have found themselves in this matter.
The mind is set here, and the road ahead is no longer flustered.
How to find this thing? If you don't know how to find it, you can at least know what you really want first, and at least know your heart first.
When you know your heart, you will find your "moon" and let it light your way.
When the road comes to an end, look for the "heart" road.