In 20 12, I traveled to Pingyao during the National Day holiday. After returning to school, I always felt extremely tired and my vision became a little blurred. When I went to the school hospital for consultation, the doctor only told me to go back and rest more and apply a hot towel to my eyes.
After a few days, it didn't work, except that the eyelids were swollen and the ankles became thicker.
I was a little worried, so I went to the First Affiliated Hospital of Zhengzhou University and signed up. Urine routine protein "++". B-ultrasound showed that the kidney was 9 cm long and 4 cm wide, and serum creatinine was 468. The physician told me for sure: "The kidneys have begun to shrink. I estimate that chronic nephritis is very likely, but it is not clear what caused it. "
"Doctor, am I very ill? Can it be cured? " I didn't know the meaning of these indicators at that time.
"It depends on how to say it. As for whether it can be cured, there is no good way at present. "
The doctor didn't answer my question directly, but I understood that the expression was so euphemistic, indicating that the disease might be difficult-the last time I heard such an expression was when my late uncle was just diagnosed with bladder cancer.
I wiped the sweat from my palms and my pants were wrinkled. I tried to control myself and wanted to say "thank you" to the doctor, but I couldn't say anything. I stood up with my desk in front, and the doctor comforted me: "Take your time, pay attention to your diet at ordinary times, don't get tired, and have regular dialysis, which is not much different from normal people."
Holding the checklist, I leaned against the corridor of the hospital, closed my eyes and tears fell down.
This year, I was just 2 1 year old. I haven't graduated from college, haven't got married, haven't worked, and haven't experienced much. Why did I suddenly become like this? I don't know.
On my way back to school, I called my dad. I didn't want to worry him, but I choked up, as if I couldn't control it. My father said, "don't cry, I'll treat you if you are ill." I'll go to your school right away. "
When I got to school, I didn't want to talk to anyone except texting my girlfriend and telling her "I'm going home for a while". I went to the academic affairs office to ask if I could continue studying at school after I got this disease, and the teacher on duty was not sure. After the consultation, he quickly replied to me: "In principle, yes, but my classmates are dying. Why not take a year off? " Of course, quitting school later is also forced to quit school.
Dad rushed to school, read my case, and refused to believe it anyway. How can you get this disease at a young age? He insisted on taking me for a diagnosis. The results of renal biopsy showed: "crescentic nephritis, IGA5 grade, global fibrosis".
Neither my father nor I understand, but we generally know that this is not a good result. In the end, the doctor's words ruthlessly shattered the only remaining fantasy of our father and son: "It's basically uremia, let's make a basket first."
I refused dialysis at that time. I didn't want to be chained to a machine like a monster all my life. The word "dialysis" is to me what "jumping off a building" is to young Shi Tiesheng. I don't want to hear anyone mention it.
When I got home, I stubbornly believed in the traditional Chinese medicine prescriptions I found online, and my grandmother also found many remedies for me: soaking frogs in vinegar, eating swim bladder raw, and forcing myself to eat anything disgusting and unpalatable. I hurried to the hospital and didn't get better at all. There is more and more water in my body, which oppresses my heart and makes it difficult to breathe.
After three months, my health deteriorated and I would die without dialysis. In the last few days at home, I even had hallucinations. Later, I learned that my kidney was failing and my body didn't detoxify at all.
My father and brother-in-law forced me to "twist" into Zunyi Hospital, and Dr. Tan was the patient. Dad asked him, "can you persuade my child?" We don't want him to do dialysis, but his life is very important. "
Dr. Tan looked at me, said nothing, dragged me to the dialysis room, pointed to the dialysis patient in the hospital bed and said to me, "Well, I'm 3 1 year-old, and I just found out that creatinine 1 is more than 200." After dialysis for half a year, his wife divorced him with her children; This is smaller than you, less than 12. I didn't pay attention to purpura when I was 7 years old, and finally developed into uremia. I have been dialysis here for two years. That one over there, originally acute nephritis, can be recovered. He was delayed into uremia by traditional Chinese medicine. What do you want him to do ... Nobody wants to get the disease, but he just got it. what do you think? Not alive? You are still young, honestly dialysis, maybe you can change your kidney in the future. "
This is the first time I have seen other uremic patients in reality.
From that day on, I stayed in this dialysis room for almost five years, from the first two days 1 time to three times a week after half a year, I finally slowly accepted the reality that I had uremia. For a long time, I took care of myself almost abnormally-strictly avoiding food and controlling water. Dialysis for several years, only caught a cold once and went to the hospital once.
17 February 17, I was studying decoration with my master in a small apartment when I suddenly got a call from Dr. Tan asking how I was doing. I proudly replied to Dr. Tan: "I have a good figure and nothing unusual."
"There is a kidney source. Do you want to consider transplantation? What is the economy? Can you keep up, at least 200,000? " The other end of the phone said.
This phone call really surprised and delighted me. The good news is that this good thing that has nothing to do with me can really hit me. Some time ago, I had a kidney, but I just held the idea of focusing on participation and didn't expect anything. Surprisingly, it cost so much money.
On the phone, Dr. Tan also specifically told me that a patient had just had a transplant and was in good condition, but later he was infected and spent more than 400 thousand intensive care. The family's economy can't keep up, and his family can only be forced to give up treatment. In the end, people and money are empty.
Dr. Tan should have felt my hesitation and comforted me by saying, "If the money is not in place, wait for the next time." It's not without a chance. Call me back before noon 12. "
Hanging up the phone, I stayed alone on the balcony for a long time. Who doesn't want to be a normal person? I decided to take a gamble.
I made three phone calls. My father, my brother and Xiaofeng-Xiaofeng is my childhood. Junior high school and high school have been together. After I got sick, he stayed with me and helped me a lot-they unanimously supported my kidney transplant.
When my family's savings were less than 200 thousand, everyone began to cobble together. By noon, this 20 thousand and that 30 thousand barely made up 400 thousand. I'll call Dr. Tan back and get ready to pack up and go. I even brought pajamas.-What if I can operate?
At half past three in the afternoon, when the group walked to Huichuan Avenue, they received a phone call from Dr. Tan. I thought he had urged me to go, and quickly said, "I'll be right there." I am already in town. "
Dr. Tan said with great regret, "Sorry, the donor's family decided not to donate for the time being, so the operation could not be done." I don't know what to say at the moment. Dr. Tan said, "You are in town. Do you want to come over and we can communicate? "
We are all here, so it's nice to talk. In the hospital office, Dr. Tan told me all kinds of questions about the transplant operation and the cost. I also specifically asked how to exercise at home so that I can wait for the transplant at any time.
Then I went home. At 6: 30 pm, the car shop arrived in Tu Ping, and I arrived home 40 minutes later. Just as the car was about to climb the hill, Dr. Tan's phone came again: "Where are you?" After communicating with my family, I decided to donate and come to the hospital immediately. "
We were all surprised. I told Dr. Tan that we were on our way home. He's a little sorry. Finally, he said, "Try to come here, if possible."
So we turned around and rushed to the hospital. It was almost 9 pm.
The hospital is still the same, the corridor is full of beds, and the head nurse is calling her staff to allocate staff for the transplant operation tonight.
When I entered the preoperative conversation room, I saw two patients with me as alternatives: a little brother with acne scars, accompanied by more than a dozen family members, who heard that he was driving a Lexus, and an old man who was about 60 years old and hobbled with only one daughter.
From the conversation behind them, I learned that the families of these two patients are both hospital medical staff. To tell the truth, it makes me a little depressed, maybe I won't have a chance-but seeing the state of two patients, I comfort myself again.
After a brief introduction, Dr. Tan means that all tests should be done, and whoever is the most suitable will be allowed to go.
Chest, lungs, liver and gallbladder, electrocardiogram, stomach, blood vessels, color Doppler ultrasound, until 3 am, the penultimate gastroscope, because the gastroscope room temporarily worked overtime, there was no anesthesiologist, so it could not be painless. When Lexus and I went to the gastroscope room, the old man was vomiting. Gastroscope really makes people feel queasy. Old people's blood pressure is low, so they just don't worry about the danger of high blood pressure.
My blood pressure is 140, which may be the cause of fatigue that day. It's too high. Lexus is worse than me. Gastroscope began to talk about many risks brought by hypertension to gastroscopy, and everyone was silent. After a long time, Lexus asked in dismay, "Can this inspection not be done?" The doctor firmly denied his request, and the gastroscope was impatient: "Give you five minutes to think about it, or I will go back to rest."
At this moment, Dr. Tan came. After understanding the situation, he said: "This is definitely risky, and transplant surgery is even more risky. In addition, what kind of disease is your blood pressure normal? "
Five years of dialysis life has cut me off from real life for too long, and I am eager to become a normal person.
"I will do it!" I stood up first.
Fortunately, the inspection went well. At 5 o'clock in the morning, basically all the results came out.
In view of the results of the preoperative conversation, Dr. Tan made an evaluation: "Lexus" had a cold and fever and refused directly. His family was disappointed and heard that he smoked heavily. The test results of the elderly are ok, but there is some hypoglycemia; Dr. Tan finally confirmed that I was the object of surgery.
This is the first operation in my life, and it is also the operation I have been wanting to do for so many years. I am nervous and looking forward to it.
The next step is to prepare skin. A slightly fat middle-aged male doctor came over and asked, "Who will do the operation?" To prepare the skin. "He and I went to the next room. There is a bed in it. He pointed to the bed and said, "Lie flat and take off your pants." Seeing that I took off my pants and didn't move, I ordered, "I took off my underwear, too." "After picking it off, I saw him holding a razor in his hand, and I knew what the skin preparation was for.
In order to prevent anal sphincter relaxation, I also had an enema. With the hunger of sticking my chest to my back, I waited anxiously for the notice.
About ten minutes later, the nurse took us down to the operating room floor by elevator. The elevator was so fast that no one spoke all the way. After waiting at the door of the operating room for a while, a nurse in a surgical gown opened the door and led me in.
In the long and narrow corridor, there is an indirect operating room on both sides, which seems endless. When I entered the operating room, the nurse asked me to lie on the operating table, asked me some basic information, and then went out, leaving me lying upright on it.
There was silence all around, and I could hear my heartbeat. Just like putting a slide in front of me, people and things from the past come to my eyes. Remembering the helplessness of illness and the injustice of dialysis in recent years, the lacrimal gland swelled like vinegar, and I don't know how long it took, so I fell asleep unconsciously.
I was awakened by someone. When I woke up, I was surrounded by a large circle of doctors and nurses wearing green surgical gowns and masks. I know the operation is about to begin.
They first asked me to adjust my sleeping position, then tied my right hand tightly, and then put an oxygen mask on my face. I just felt suffocated for the first time. The nurse should have seen my nervousness and comforted me calmly and said, "Relax, relax and inhale naturally."
Next, I injected a cannula into my tied right arm. When everything was ready, the nurse unbuttoned my clothes, took off my pants and began to disinfect. Iodophor makes me feel very cold, and the effect of anesthesia will come soon. Soon, I fell asleep again
The operation took a long time. I heard that I didn't leave the operating room until noon 12 the next day. At that time, I vaguely felt that someone was calling me and slapping me. I barely woke up, but I still didn't wake up. I only realized that I was pushed unsteadily and my memory was vague and intermittent.
I vaguely remember that when I came out of the operating room, my family was waiting for me at the door. My parents, brothers and girlfriends saw me coming out and surrounded me. The operation went well and everyone was happy.
On the third day, I was completely awake, my hands and feet were tied, and when I saw that I was awake, the nurse explained the precautions to me and untied my tie. The nurse told me to get up and walk, but I still feel a little pain.
Blood is discharged from the catheter in the abdomen and accumulated in the drainage bag, which is a good sign. The whole family was very happy at that time-this was the first time I saw my urine after 5 years of dialysis. We bought measuring cups and measuring cylinders to record the daily urine volume and urine volume. Slowly, the urine volume is increasing.
Maybe I'll be happy earlier. On day 10, urine volume suddenly began to decrease. I have a bad feeling in my heart and the doctor is very nervous. I began to change my medication regimen and increased the dosage of prednisone and tacrolimus for 4 days. Everyone is on tenterhooks, afraid that the new "kidney baby" (the nickname of kidney for urine poisoning patients) will go wrong again. Because of the imbalance in and out, my body began to swell again and I had to start dialysis again, once a day.
Fortunately, on 16, urine volume began to increase, and the balance of entry and exit was slowly maintained.
2 1 That afternoon, I was finally discharged from the hospital.
But in the end there was an accident.
I clearly remember that night when I was preparing for the transplant operation, I saw a family member in the hospital bed in the corridor, shielding the bright light of the hospital with an umbrella for the patient. The patient developed antibodies after kidney transplantation. After the transplanted kidney was necrotic and taken out, his left eye was always painful and could not be opened. Until now, he was afraid of light.
On the seventh day after discharge, my left ear began to ache, and my tonsils were red and swollen, which was very painful. Because of lack of experience, I still held the idea of forbearance at that time. I didn't call Dr. Tan until this afternoon. He comforted me and said, "Don't be too nervous. Eating hormones is easy to catch a cold. "
But on the eighth day, the symptoms not only did not improve, but became more and more serious. Dr. Tan felt that the situation was not good and asked me to be hospitalized quickly.
After hospitalization, the test results were very bad, and the deterioration could not be controlled. Dr. Tan is very helpless. He suggested that I go to the affiliated hospital of Xiangya Medical College: "My teacher's technical experience and equipment are very advanced, and there must be a way." After communicating with the other party, he told me not to go, and his tutor came to see me by high-speed train.
Dr. Tan's tutor came and immediately found a machine to do puncture examination for me. The result is very regrettable-the transplanted kidney is necrotic and there is no room for recovery-according to my physical condition and reaction, it is suggested that I be hospitalized immediately and have my newly transplanted kidney removed.
"Kidney Baby" is gone.
It was after discharge that I turned over the hospitalization records one day, only to know that after I was hospitalized again, I was admitted to ICU three times and issued a critically ill notice three times. Before that, I was always in a daze. The only impression is that dialysis patients suddenly began to feel uncomfortable in the morning, and cold sweat kept pouring out like spring water. I feel sweaty eyes, my hair, clothes and pants are soaked, and the blood in my body is as dry as boiling. I want to take out all the bones in my body. I was in a trance and moved unconsciously, and my family and nurses hugged me tightly.
The doctor advised my family to give up and said, "Don't end up with both money and people." My father immediately cried, hugged my mother with red eyes and said, "I can't sign this word." I can't let my son bury me. "
Thinking of the transplanted ward, an old lady asked her father, "Are you over sixty?" My father smiled and didn't answer, but I know that my father just turned 50 this year. Over the years, he has accompanied me with his life.
After more than ten days of rescue, I recovered my life. I woke up and transferred from ICU to recovery ward. It's unpleasant to go around and return to the original point. I also heard that Dr. Tan later had two transplants, and the patient recovered well and was envious.
My lungs have been infected, and I can only infuse amino acids, fatty acids and anti-inflammatory drugs every day. Because of the high concentration of fatty acids, I often start to lose them in the blink of an eye. After a long time, my blood vessels are as hard as bones. Lying in the hospital bed for too long, muscles atrophy, only the head can move, and the hands and feet are like wood.
Dr. Tan always said to me with a worried face, "As long as you get better at once, move faster." If you don't go on like this, your muscles will be completely stereotyped and really paralyzed. " But his words, I have been a little numb. Ever since I heard the word "uremia" in the Affiliated Hospital of Zhengzhou University, I knew I could only crawl in the future.
I have been lying in the hospital for more than 100 days, relying on my parents to help me lift my legs and raise my hand to massage hot compress all day. By mid-July, I was finally discharged from the hospital again-although I was discharged from the hospital, I still shook my wheelchair most of the time every day and went to the hospital along Hangzhou Road for acupuncture dialysis.
Yes, I rejoined the dialysis army.
I vaguely remember that in September of 20 13, the day when I dropped out of school 1 year drew near. I don't want to drop out of school, and my father doesn't want me to drop out, but the teacher in charge of administration at school said to me, "classmate, you can't get well for the time being." The school certainly doesn't want every student to drop out of school, but if something happens to the school, we will take responsibility. " Father wanted to sign an exemption agreement with the school, and the teacher said, "The agreement doesn't matter, it's really an accident. If you are noisy, the school can't run. "
Finally, the school promised me that I could go back to school in five years and change my kidney so that I could continue my studies.
But now, this time limit has no meaning.
It's been 1 year since kidney transplantation, and sometimes there will be surgery scenes in my dreams. I don't know whose kidney was transplanted in the body that time, and what kind of pain did he experience? But I am still alive, which is a very happy thing, although it is so insignificant that I never realized it when I was healthy.
I don't know if I can get married or have children of my own in the future. Even I often mention "if I walk in front of them" to my parents. I don't want to die, although it is inevitable, but will I really be afraid? Do you get scared?
When writing this article, I have been thinking about a problem: happiness lies not in happiness itself, but in your delicate feelings and never being satisfied.
If I am not sick, can I really be happy?
Author | Tuan Boer
Edit | Shen
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