I once asked Christina if she wanted a little brother or a little sister. She kept shaking her head and said that babies were annoying. They can't eat and shit by themselves, and they have to be held all day. They cry and cry at night and can't sleep. Very annoying.
It seems that at the age of five, she only saw the troubles of parenting, but she didn't realize the troubles of separating her parents' love from Bao Xiao.
Do older women want to have a second child? This is basically not the child's decision, and it is normal for children to disagree. Who wants to share the cake in their bowl? Who wants to separate the love and attention of their parents? Those parents who say they will treat Dabao and Bauer equally may not be able to deeply understand Dabao's inner loss.
As an only child, I have no such experience, but all my female classmates and colleagues have examples. When I was 8 or 9 years old, my mother gave birth to a younger brother. My status plummeted, and I lost my heart. I lost trust in my parents and moved away when I grew up. As adults, they are still very sensitive to this kind of pain. They just think that their parents don't have a bowl of water, and they prefer their youngest son.
If an elderly mother really wants to have a second child, she must do some ideological construction work for Dabao.
1. When you are pregnant, tell Dabao that you love him more. When you are pregnant, although it is very uncomfortable, don't reduce your company with Dabao. Tell him we're expecting a new family member. This member needs a lot of our attention because he is weak, but it is precisely because he is weak and can't do anything that makes people tired and worried. We love you more.
2. Ask relatives and friends to bring gifts to Dabao in the hospital. When giving birth in the hospital, many relatives and friends will visit the newborn. They often bring gifts to newborns, and ask them to give Dabao a bigger gift than Bao Xiao, which makes them exaggerate and make him feel that he has been promoted to a brother and sister, more sensible and lovely, and more worthy of a gift than Bao Xiao.
3. After going home, sleep with Dabao. If Dabao is not separated from his parents, don't force Dabao to sleep separately from his mother on the grounds that her mother will take Bauer after giving birth. You can sleep on his mother's left and right, so that Dabao feels that his mother has not abandoned him. Being able to sleep with my mother can make Dabao feel more at ease.
If Dabao starts pestering people unreasonably, it means that he needs to pay attention to his mother. Anyway, after giving birth to Bauer, her mother will pay more attention to the newborn. It is clear that the baby needs to be taken care of all the time, but some mothers find that her big treasure has begun to degenerate, and those who used to be able to eat by themselves have to pull their pants. This is a protest, which means that he feels that his mother loves Bauer more and ignores himself.
A mother with a second child taught a good way to deal with the relationship between children-never always say that because his younger brother and sister want him to go, before Bauer is one year old, he should be more inclined to Yu Dabao in his thoughts and actions. Tell Dabao that we love you more, and let's take care of this new animal together. As Bauer grows up and their feelings deepen, the relationship will gradually become harmonious.
Dabao doesn't agree that the second child runs away from home, so please ask a friend to help set up the game. There are 12 and 13 junior high school students in the news. Seeing the example that the mother ran away after giving birth to the second child, adolescent children are inevitably overexcited. If the children of elderly women are so old, it is really necessary to consider whether to have a second child.
I saw a friend handle it well and share it with you here:
There is a 12-year-old girl whose mother is pregnant with a second child. She refused to live or die. She climbed to the roof and threatened her mother to have an abortion, which alarmed public security, fire fighting, community and many other aspects. At that time, her mother was more than seven months old, not to say that she could take a taxi after having an abortion.
Then a friend called his daughter: Do you know who I am? A: Yes, you are Aunt X. Aunt X: Is your mother really pregnant? Yes, it's been several months. Aunt X: You don't want your mother to have a second child, do you? A: Yes. Aunt X: Can we discuss something? I've always wanted a baby. Your mother gave birth to this baby. Can I hold it? A: OK. Aunt X: Well, let your mother live in peace now, and I'll take her away when she gives birth.
In this way, after the baby was born safely, Aunt X pretended to hold the baby, and 12-year-old daughter was so scared that even the door of the delivery room was closed for fear that she would take the baby away. A crisis was thus lifted.
You say, what should this daughter do if she wants Aunt X to take the child away? I remember an episode in "Smart Rest" in which a child didn't love his mother and said that he would bury his mother after a short rest. The child suddenly woke up when he saw that his mother was going to be buried. It seems that this method might as well give it a try. Aunt X can mutter that she doesn't really want children now, so bury it. Words, do that, the child is not soft-hearted, this is a what kind of Xiong Haizi!