If parents have the ability to help their children and are more than enough, then naturally I won't say anything, it's okay. But the reality is that more families have limited ability. For the sake of their children, the elderly facing retirement have to bear huge loans, have to go to other places to continue their work, and even face No Country for Old Men.
What's more, young people live with their parents and use them, but they still feel that their parents are not capable enough. They also gnawed away the heart of comparison. They are not trying to make progress, but asking their parents to make progress for their own happiness. Parents can't satisfy their own desires, but they complain that their parents are useless, instead of reflecting on themselves. This is what I don't want to see.
Lao Li's son came back today. Every time I come back, Lao Li's wife will suffer, either from others or from her son. Lao Li and his wife also helped their son hide things, but when his son came back, it was always so noisy. How can they hide?
The sound insulation effect of the old community is not good. Mr. and Mrs. Lao Li cover up their son's ugliness. Good things don't go out, and bad things spread thousands of miles. Who doesn't know that Lao Li's family has a son who is not worried?
No wonder everyone knows that it's not just the poor sound insulation. Every time this son of Lao Li comes back, he makes a lot of noise, asking for money or something. Whether he can arrive or not can be seen from his attitude when he goes out.
It was almost here, and I left happily soon. Nothing happened. If you don't get it, it's hard to say, at least for a while, and sometimes you can beat the old couple.
Some time ago, Lao Li's son came back once and said that he had a new girlfriend. Lao Li and his wife were quite happy at first.
After all, my son is really old. Now he is 34 years old after New Year's Day. He has never been married. Although he has been dating and knowing girls, he rarely falls in love. The old couple were worried about their son, who didn't even ask, so they thought:
"You return not bashful to ask me, don't blame you, what skill all have no, nothing can give me, now the girl is more realistic, who is willing to talk to me about unconditional things?
Just say Xiao Hui's family, how powerful his father is. He opened a factory and bought him that mansion and villa. You didn't see it, but I saw it. The living room is the same as the shabby house you bought me, or the pool area.
My house, I am embarrassed to take it out at all, and I am embarrassed to say it. You also asked me why I couldn't find someone. Tell me, why can't I find someone? I have the cheek to ask questions after me. I am really speechless. "By the way, Lao li and his wife, in fact, the conditions are not bad. Locals in big cities have hukou. Although their work is not particularly good, they are old employees anyway, and their welfare benefits are quite good. Even the house where they live now is the dormitory of that year.
The old couple are just children, and they have worked hard to raise their son. Although not very naughty, I don't like studying very much at school, and my academic performance has always been a crane tail.
At that time, the old couple also tried their best. Lao Li's wife deliberately resigned and came back to take care of the children. But her son refused to change, so she enrolled him in many cram schools and spent a lot of money. However, her son has repeatedly skipped classes and went to Internet cafes, surfing the Internet with tuition fees. The living expenses of that family went out overnight, so it can be said that the child has no heart at all.
Lao Li beat and scolded, but after all, he was one of our own, and he still didn't make up his mind to hurt his son. Sometimes I really want to fight, but when I get to the front, I can't bear to see my son miserable. Over time, Lao Li's soft-hearted son saw through it, and the stick policy that was not implemented in place was completely ineffective.
Later, when his son went to high school, Lao Li was completely open-minded. Even if his son doesn't succeed, he can get a diploma. Later, he came out and found a medium-sized job to support himself. He can't control it, and he doesn't want to.
Later, Lao Li's son played a stable role in the college entrance examination. He was admitted to a third-rate university and chose a poor major. After several years in college, he accomplished nothing and almost didn't graduate. At the urging of Lao Li, he simply passed the make-up exam and got the diploma.
When Lao Li's son came out to look for a job, it was also all kinds of complaints, whether he was high or not, whether he was low or not, whether he was tired or not, and he felt that his job was not high enough. After half a year's work failure, he took it out on Lao Li.
"My dormitory a few buddy, somebody else just came to college, parents have arranged a job, a good job immediately after graduation, don't worry about not finding a job.
I was the only one who graduated and couldn't find a job. You can't help me, and you don't know how to help me find someone. After all these years, can't you find someone who can help? How can you do this, parents? I don't care if I was born. What's my use? I was left behind when I was born. "
Later, my son simply stopped looking for a job, chewed on his old money at home and played games every day and did nothing. Lao Li couldn't stand it. After a few words, he broke the bowl and smashed the pot.
Lao Li had no choice but to lick his face and go to the old leader to give gifts, but the old leader has retired for many years and can't ask anything. After many twists and turns, he found many people and spent a lot of money. Finally, Lao Li found his son a decent job with a good salary, so he didn't want it.
After work, Lao Li's son has always been self-centered and earned a lot of money, but he spends it every month, lives at home, eats at home and spends his parents' money to repay the loan. After working for seven or eight years, I didn't save a dime and didn't buy anything for Lao Li's wife. He still feels at ease.
How comfortable is it? Two years ago, Lao Li's son began to ask his parents for a house. In fact, Lao Li also saved a sum of money for his son's marriage, and the down payment for buying a house was also ready. But when my son opens his mouth, he wants the best house in the lot, 20,000 square meters, takes a fancy to a real estate, buys everything he says, grinds day and night like a child, and never gives up until he reaches his goal, grinding Lao Li to the point where he can, gritting his teeth and saving his pension money.
The follow-up loan was originally made by my son, but my son said that his dead salary was not enough for his own use. If you don't pay it back for two months, you can't make ends meet, and it finally falls on the old couple.
After the house was renovated, my son immediately moved out of the house and lived in a new house. He doesn't come back often. When he came back, he had a clear purpose and always scraped something from the old couple before giving up.
Last time I came back, one was to show that I had a girlfriend and the other was to ask for money.
"My new girlfriend hates me for not having a car. Buy me a car. I am already optimistic. I can get the landing price of 400 thousand, and the down payment100 thousand is also ok It's not very expensive. This car is decent and cost-effective. You bought me a car. I think this girl and I can do it. "
My son speaks very fast, but he has no money to buy a car. Although the old couple took a pension of several thousand yuan, they still had to pay back the loan. Over the years, they have posted a lot of pension money to their sons, but they really can't get it out. As a result, his son left in a rage. When he left, he shouted, "I must buy a car. I want to buy it. You must give me an answer next time I come back. If my car is yellow, I will have to do so. "
After her son left, Lao Li's daughter-in-law wiped her tears and repeatedly said that she was guilty. Lao Li didn't sleep well for several nights. If it is a normal request, they all agreed, but this request has far exceeded their load. Even if she wanted to agree, she couldn't. If her son is unhappy, there is nothing they can do.
My son came back this time to get the answer, and Lao Li told me the truth. He refused his son's request, because he really couldn't afford it, so it was acceptable for him to lower some standards and buy a car of several hundred thousand.
He and his son had a good discussion, but the son didn't listen and overturned the table: "Why did you give birth to me in the first place?" I have no ability to support me at all. I don't want anything. I have everything. I really regret being born in your home. "
The son's words deeply hurt the hearts of the old couple. His son left without cutting, but Lao Li was ill and didn't get out of bed for several days. However, the other party is his own son, and he can only think of him. The old couple even want to sell their house, rent their own house, satisfy their son's desire and show off to his son. It's really hard.
Perhaps gnawing at the old is innocent in a sense, but it is natural to be guilty of gnawing at the old. Without gratitude, you treat your parents as free ATMs, and you spend generously and happily. As everyone knows, you are eating your parents' meat and drinking their blood, wasting your good years and your life.
Why is it a waste of life? Idle away time? It's actually quite simple. People are lazy. It's hard to work on your own, but it's easy to get it by your parents. It can be done easily once or twice, and the other party doesn't need your return. Who doesn't like this convenient thing?
The more times you can contact, you will gradually find that short-term efforts are very troublesome and can't see the effect. It's a long way to go, but reaching out is different. You don't have to pay for efficiency. Over time, will you still want to work hard? Can you still have the perseverance to work hard?
I'm afraid it will be difficult. When you taste the sweetness, you will be addicted to it. Dissatisfaction will make you resentful. Why can other people's parents pay more? Why can't they? Why are they so useless? Why was I born in such a family?
Really, gnawing at the old will slowly exhaust a person's future and many unknown possibilities. He no longer fantasizes about what he can do, but forces his parents to do it and realize it himself. Can you say that you are innocent without conscience? Can you forgive such a child?
If you don't recognize the facts, you will spoil him and harm his life.
Even if you have the ability to give, Lian Fang still suggests that you give less. If you are used to reaching out, they will not know how to cherish it. Only by letting them know that everything from their parents does not belong to them for granted, will they be grateful, filial and become people.
Not a moth, not a leech, not a heartless baiwenhang, but a person who really knows how to be grateful, how to give back, and how to be filial.