(A) Analysis of the reasons for refusal anxiety
Many times, falling behind our peers is not only our own reasons, but also caused by many external factors. These external factors include our own living environment, educational resources and even interpersonal resources. When we are not as good as our peers, we must first analyze the reasons for backwardness.
Take me for example. I am a candidate from Hebei. I go to college in Shanghai. When I first arrived at the university, I realized the huge gap, not to mention my peers. Even for people younger than me, there is a big gap. When I took CET-4, other students had already taken TOEFL and IELTS. When I studied English for more than ten years, but most of them just stayed on the test paper, many children younger than me could talk fluently in English.
At first, I was really anxious and felt useless. But in fact, if you think about it carefully, you will know that these gaps are not only our own reasons, but also have a great relationship with our own environment. Therefore, if we lag behind our peers, we must analyze the reasons and refuse anxiety. Anxiety can't solve anything.
(b) Learn from each other's strengths and make continuous progress.
It is a truth that we have understood since childhood, but we rarely do it. What is learning from each other? As the name implies, it is to give full play to one's strengths and make up for one's shortcomings. So how to learn from each other objectively and correctly?
Find your way forward. Everyone's energy is limited, so it's very important to find the right direction. Remember not to "cover everything" because it is very difficult. Sometimes one thing is not successful, but it will affect the progress of other things. So you can try to do it little by little, and try to set a goal first.
Seeking truth from facts and rejecting "comparison": There is no doubt that comparison is an important means to measure the gap between ourselves and others, but it should be noted that what we need to do is objective comparison, not "comparison". Everyone has his own way of life. We can take advantage of other people's strengths, but not "copy", because some things are not suitable for ourselves, and it is not easy for us to "copy" success. The best things are not others' or their own, but should really suit them.
Many times, you have your own choices and independent thoughts. What suits others may not suit you, and you don't have to do it yourself. So you need to choose according to your actual situation and think independently, instead of doing what others do and trying aimlessly.
Down-to-earth, continuous progress, we can not eat fat, progress can not be seen in a day. Shortcuts are deceptive, only down-to-earth, step by step their own gains are truly their own. This process may not be smooth sailing, but only in this way can we gain more.
(3) Conclusion
Everyone has his own bright spots and shortcomings. When we feel that we are behind our peers, it is normal to feel anxious, but please don't be depressed, give up or even deny ourselves, which will not help us at all. Our first task is to analyze the reasons, learn from each other's strong points and make continuous progress.