I suppressed my anger and said to her as calmly as possible. "Mom has always believed in you. You decide when to do your calligraphy homework.
"
"Third, tomorrow will definitely end.
"My daughter said to me carefully.
Today, when I got home, my daughter really finished all her homework. I believe that children really have surprises.
Tao Xingzhi, a famous educator, said: "The whole secret of educating children lies in trusting them.
"
If parents have full trust in their children, children will develop in a positive direction after feeling their parents' feedback.
It is best to prove that love is trust.
In the recent variety show My Daughter, the most famous Jiang became the envy of everyone and became popular many times.
In the program, when asked if Jiang's father looked up his boyfriend Andrew's information on the Internet, he calmly replied. "Don't look up, believe in her daughter's eyes.
She told us everything.
"
Therefore, Zhang Wei's "Dad never said such a thing to me" aroused the envy of the audience, and Li also said that "the family atmosphere is really good. Children want to tell their parents everything.
"
Regarding his daughter's marriage, Jiang's father thinks that it is up to her to decide what his daughter wants to choose, whether her daughter wants to get married or not, and what kind of boyfriend to find. It's good that your daughter is happy.
Judging from the daily communication between Meng Jie and her parents, both parents believe in her and the family atmosphere is very democratic, which gives her enough trust and freedom. Meng Jie is also true, simple and happy.
American psychologist Joyce Blacet said. "The best proof of love is trust, and mutual trust is the best love for children.
"
Parents don't trust their children, take on everything and raise them into huge babies. Children naturally can't dominate their own lives, and finally they can't do well, so that they don't trust children.
Parents who really love their children must believe that their children are naturally upward, that they can do what they can and give them timely encouragement.
The more parents trust their children, the better their children will be.
Parenting expert Huang Jingjie shared an interesting story about his son's childhood.
My son went to boarding school to study composition, and he was very concerned about his classmates when he came back. He repeatedly told his mother that he never wanted to meet again next year.
Because this classmate always likes to comment on his songs.
She saw that her son had a complicated psychology towards this classmate. On the one hand, he knows that others are professional, but he feels embarrassed when others make suggestions. This "jealousy" mentality is very strange.
She could have told her son not to complain so much about his classmate, but she just suggested that his son know more about this classmate, which might change his opinion of him.
Two weeks later, her son suddenly said to her. "He realized that ability is very strong. You can learn a lot from him.
"
Huang Jingjie said that she trusted her son's judgment. After interacting with that classmate, she made her own judgment without her own intervention.
I take my children to the amusement park in the community. A little girl is playing with sand with a shovel. My brother robbed me as soon as he arrived. Girls don't give it. Brother cried.
My mother, who is playing with her mobile phone, heard crying and ran over. A vicious girl shouldn't hit her brother. The girl tried to explain, but her mother said impatiently, "You must have hit your brother. No one was crying around him. I cried beside you.
"
Elder sister may give priority to younger brother. After the mother didn't trust her sister, my brother didn't give him a shovel no matter how he cried.
Parents are the strongest pillars of children, but when unconditional trust is needed, parents don't trust themselves. A kind of distrust will inevitably destroy the parent-child relationship and weaken children's natural trust in their parents.
Huang Jingjie wrote in the book: "Parents' trust in their children determines their abilities. If they believe in their inner strength, they will correct themselves and eventually become stronger and better.
"
To trust children, parents must do these three things.
The China Youth Research Center once conducted a survey on "the present situation and expectation of study and life".
In the survey, among the 10 ways that children like their parents best, the first one is "trust me".
Parents' trust in children is the high frequency of parents' trust in children, the best affirmation and expectation for children, and the great source of strength for children's healthy growth and forge ahead.
How do parents trust their children?
Step 1: Let go moderately.
Seeing relatives and friends making small envelopes with patterns, my daughter also wants to make them herself. She asked me if I could, but I deliberately said I couldn't attend the meeting.
She said she might be able to do it and needed to do it with me. I'm happy to interrupt.
Then she cut paper step by step, painted on it, and finally made a really good envelope.
Sometimes she needs to be cut or painted again, but I will play dumb and give her a chance to correct it.
Finally, it took a long time to make the envelope. I am impressed with her and believe that she can do what she can.
Anna Kundera said this. "The most successful love of parents is not to leave their children around, but to raise them, make them independent and let them go.
"
When children try new things in their study and life, parents can play the fool in a daze appropriately, or they can give their children instructions in a hurry and let them do it themselves.
Second, don't make noise
Yin Jianli, a child-rearing expert, said: "Although the extra attention and comfort satisfy parents, it also gives children distrust and humiliation.
"
Parents always nag their children, which is actually a sign that adults don't trust their children. Parents are very upset and can't really trust their children when they are upset.
Three. No anxiety
Ou in the movie Miracle Boy can't face up to his looks.
On the first day of school, he was bruised and bruised by his classmates' complicated eyes and said sadly to his mother, "Why is it so ugly?
"
Mother said to him calmly, "You are not a scandal, Augie."
There are different marks on people's faces, and this map of the heart guides us the way forward; Appearance this map records the road we have traveled, and it is definitely not ugly.
"
Auggie gained confidence from his mother's uneasy eyes and bravely went to school alone the next day.
Psychologist Wu Zhihong once said that parents' anxiety sends a message to their children, that is, "you can't do it".
If children feel distrustful because of their parents' anxiety and unconsciously feel "I can't do it", and parents who are afraid of work are not anxious, children can move forward more confidently.
Finally, write down:
The famous "Rosenthal experiment" in psychology shows that when parents fully trust their children, the children will give positive feedback, and the children will continue to develop in a positive direction after feeling the feedback from their parents.
Don't be noisy, don't be impatient, believe that children have positive self-improvement instinct, let children develop their own instinct, improve their internal drive, and finally stimulate their own small universe.
"Even if the world doesn't believe you, I believe it.
"The mother of the movie" Spice Girls at the Bottom "often told Shayega. She finally changed from a rebellious scholar to a scholar admitted to a famous university.
May we all be Shayegama's mother and parents!
The book recommended to you today is The House of Origin.
Parents are children's mirrors and their first teachers.
As parents, we should love our children and create a warm and loving family atmosphere.
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