In the consulting story in the book, the visitor Jia Hui also encountered such a problem. She has unspeakable excitement and expectation for writing, and her dream is to become a reporter or columnist. But her father gave her two choices, one is to study medicine and the other is to study law. These two jobs are also in line with parents' good jobs: stable and decent, and high income.
When making a career choice, should Jiahui listen to her parents' requirements or her own heart? Maybe you want to say, of course, listen to your heart, do what you like, or study law or medicine at Harvard, which will be the golden road to a rich society, but as a consultant, you should always keep a neutral attitude, or help visitors judge and deal with current problems by themselves.
The first step of consultation is to help Jiahui better understand herself and determine the career development direction suitable for her abilities and interests. The counselor asked her to list her strengths and weaknesses in writing and becoming a lawyer, and analyze which areas she has a greater and faster chance of success.
The second step of consultation is to help Jiahui and her father understand each other's thoughts through effective communication. When we have conflicts with our parents' ideas, we often fall into a quarrel directly. Arguing not only can't solve the problem, but also makes us think in order to refute our parents. So how can we communicate effectively? Counselors inspire Jiahui to first respect his parents and learn from his father's wisdom in life, so that he will in turn respect you and understand you. In the communication with her father, she listened carefully to why her father wanted Jiahui to go to law school so badly and tried not to argue with him. The consultant also did role-playing with Jiahui. She is a father and a consultant, so that she can learn how to be a good listener.
Through the communication with her father, she understood that her father's greatest concern was only to make her succeed in her career, but he did not say that this profession must be a lawyer, which made Jiahui feel happy. After that, she compared the advantages and disadvantages of the two occupations with her father, and showed him her published works in recent years. By discussing the facts and understanding each other's feelings and needs, they realized effective communication.
In the end, my father recognized Jiahui's career choice, and Jiahui successfully became a reporter of a famous magazine after graduation.
In this consulting case, we can see that the consultant should not be partial to any party, but should adopt a neutral attitude to urge the visitors to recognize themselves through thinking and choose their own life path. At the same time, help visitors understand their father's feelings and needs through more effective communication skills, and finally win his support.
Everyone is responsible for his own life. Other people's suggestions are for reference only. When your choice is opposed by your parents, learn to respect your parents first. Understanding each other's feelings and needs through communication will not only help to sort out ideas, but also gain mutual understanding.