First, there is a growing daughter at home.
On a rainy night, I met Xinya's mother, a girl of 14 years old.
Because of the rain, the early winter, which should not be so cold, suddenly turned cold.
Wang Shanshan, a woman under forty, has a face full of anxiety and fatigue.
She said that she had no time to take care of her daughter because she had to go to work. So Xinya was sent to her grandmother's house in the country when she was three months old.
It was not until she was in the first grade at the age of seven that she and her husband Cao took their daughter to her side.
She had a son for a few months. Although she quit her job, she still can't take care of her two children alone.
Cao Wei works as a salesman in a textile factory. She travels frequently and seldom stays at home with her and her children.
When my daughter came back, she found that she had learned many bad habits from her mother-in-law in the country.
For example, if you don't pay attention to hygiene, you will lose your temper and cry if you are not satisfied.
In the process of correcting her daughter, she constantly clashed with her daughter, and her cheerful daughter became a little silent in front of her.
Because her husband is often away from home and there is no one around to help, she often makes a hullabaloo about her daughter who can't do her homework according to her requirements.
But Wang Shanshan felt that whenever she yelled at her daughter, saw her moping and felt sorry for herself, she would apologize to her daughter and they made up.
So she always felt that she could get along with her daughter, so her daughter Xinya went from elementary school to junior high school.
Second, the derailed husband
Wang Shanshan found out that her husband Cao Wei had cheated her when her daughter was twelve.
From traveling more and more, to getting impatient with her and her children, and then staying at home for a few days in January. She found that Cao Wei was getting more and more abnormal until the ambiguous message appeared.
She felt very wronged, quit her job, took care of her children at home, and took care of her family and children wholeheartedly, which led to this result.
She called Cao Wei back and asked him why he cheated. The other party refused to admit that she was suspicious and insane.
Call my mother-in-law and cry, hoping that her mother-in-law will stand on her side and criticize Cao Wei so that he can concentrate on taking care of his family and children.
But the mother-in-law not only does not say her son's fault, but also scolds her daughter Xinya. I think she doesn't work, she doesn't earn money, and she can't find endless business all day.
What makes her unbearable is that her mother-in-law also told her daughter Xinya: It is not uncommon for many men to do this now. It's not like your dad doesn't support his family. It's none of your business.
To this end, she had a big fight with her mother-in-law and rarely let her daughter go back to her hometown.
Third, take your daughter to catch rape.
Lao Liang talked about a 33-year-old cold beauty in the program, not looking for an object.
When a girl was a child, she was very close to a female classmate and often went to play with lesbian scientists. The mother of a female classmate often asks her, is her mother at home? Is dad at home? In that case.
At that time, I was young and didn't think about anything in the middle. It was not until one day that menstruation went home and whispered to her mother for a while that her mother's expression changed greatly, and she didn't know the ins and outs of the matter.
It turns out that his father and his female classmate's mother have an abnormal relationship. After that, her mother opened the door and took her to catch the rape for three days.
From the previous peace to constant fighting, I have to stuff my ears with toilet paper every day when I write my homework.
Dad's anger and mom's hysteria left her nowhere to hide, and she didn't know how to resolve it.
From then on, she regarded the relationship between men and women as a symbol of evil and felt that men were not good things.
Although her parents didn't divorce, the harm they brought her was far less quiet than divorce.
When she grew up, she refused to have a boyfriend. 33 years old, she hasn't been in love yet. She doesn't want to get close to any man, and she doesn't care about her own man.
That's why she was hit so hard when she was a child that she couldn't get out for decades.
Later, she went to a professional psychologist and poured out her heart.
Today's Xinya mother has also embarked on the old path of this woman and mother in Lao Liang's story. She kept an eye on her husband, Cao Wei, and took her daughter to catch the rape at the slightest sign.
With her persistent persistence, she finally caught her husband, lover and daughter in bed.
But she ignored it. At this time, her daughter in the second day of junior high school had suffered from severe depression, and even going to school normally became a problem.
She often shuts herself in her room, stays out all day, and often scratches her hair, so she has no appetite. It is common for a person to sit in a daze.
Wang Shanshan was in a hurry. She has repeatedly assured her daughter that she will not give her any pressure, and she will handle things with her father and let her go to school.
However, how can time go back, and my daughter's once bright eyes become a little dim.
/kloc-flower of life, a 0/4-year-old girl, died with her mother's repeated rape before she bloomed, which made people around her feel sad and pitied.
At the suggestion of the psychological counselor, Wang Shanshan is now taking her children to see depression, and she is also going through divorce procedures with her husband.
It's just that she doesn't know when her daughter Xinya will get out of the depressed smog and take up her schoolbag to chase her dreams!
Fourth, a new starting point
If a woman has been suffering from internal friction in her marriage, she should get out of it as soon as possible.
In fact, single mothers have nothing to be afraid of, and it is far less harmful to their children than beating, cursing and slandering all day when they are together.
Mothers who have been hurt know better that people who have hurt themselves will make themselves stronger.
Meyer, the author of My Life, is a mother of three children, all of whom are excellent.
Meyer herself is a nutritionist and model, and she seems to have the most perfect life. But in her book, she admits that she has been a single mother since she was 3 1 year old.
In the process from South Africa to Canada and then to the United States, I experienced various economic difficulties. When I was in Canada, I tried to use the saved10,000 dollars to pay the down payment on my house, but my bank refused to apply for a mortgage loan because of my low income.
I have been single for more than 40 years since I was 3 1 year old. Before I was 40 years old, I was a love rat harvester. I even tried online dating in my early fifties, but I never met true love.
However, no matter what happens, Meyer always keeps working hard, makes a new plan, and then moves on. She said: I used to think that I would never be happy again, never! But even so, I will make a plan to escape from despair, because being unhappy all the time is not the right way to open my life.
She said: Not every plan can be realized, so you must learn to make another plan. The ups and downs of life are like riding a roller coaster.
In the preface of "Life is Me", it is said that the most useful education for children is to let them see that you are trying to be a better self. Other than that, it is not important.
Therefore, any "roaring" education can't compare with parents' words and deeds.
To let children learn, we must first insist on reading;
To make children progress, we must first make continuous progress.
Only by reading more books and improving themselves can parents convince their children and make education really effective.
Every excellent child is the result of long-term parenting by parents.
It is not advisable to take the child as a bargaining chip, or to take the child to stand with yourself, and it is absolutely unacceptable to take the child to catch rape.
Many mothers fall into the mire of marriage for their children. Later, for the sake of children, I jumped out of the shackles of marriage.
Learn to turn the past upside down and live a better life.
Trapped in the quagmire of the past, torturing yourself over and over again has no meaning except deepening the pain.
Only by making positive changes can life be sunny.
No matter when, you can live in the present with peace of mind and open your own flowers freely. Children will know how to be themselves in your independence and strength.
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