Xiao Li is a beautiful Jiangnan woman. She grew up in a big family, including parents, grandparents, brothers and sisters, cousins, and seven aunts and eight aunts.
Because she is the only girl in her family, she has to come and go in the rain since she was a child.
From kindergarten to college to work, she went smoothly.
Under the protection of her parents and brothers, and under the supervision of her teacher, she didn't begin to be pursued by boys who thought it was feasible at home until she worked for two years.
So, in my words: she is still a little girl in love! (that is, "silly white sweetness" in intimate relationships)
She agreed to the title I gave her, so when she met her caring husband, she ignored the unanimous opposition of her family and resolutely married her husband!
According to Xiao Li, since she was born, the misfortune in her "life" began two years ago, when she found that her husband's words and deeds suddenly changed:
First of all, her husband's mobile phone password has changed, and she can no longer open it at will;
Secondly, she found her husband always hiding in the study to answer the phone, not only for a long time, but also often with laughter;
Once again, my husband no longer wears the clothes that Xiao Li bought before. Recently, I often buy some "young" clothes, especially when I participate in cooperative projects.
Finally, my husband's attitude towards Xiao Li dropped sharply and he began to dislike Xiao Li! (The above points can be used as a reference for men's derailment precursors)
It is understandable to say that her husband doesn't like Xiao Li.
Because Xiao Li is a girl from Jiao Jiao, she has clothes to wear and food to eat. It is said that my husband will definitely take Xiao Li with him if he works overtime, for fear that Xiao Li will be bored at home alone.
All these years, it was my husband or Xiao Li's parents.
Even my husband is sometimes very busy, and the clothes and sheets at home are washed by Xiao Li's mother. Sometimes the underwear that my husband didn't wash was washed by Xiao Li's mother. Xiao Li doesn't have to do this.
In addition to going to work every day, she goes home to play with her children, that is, to brush the drama. Because in her mind, she thinks that family and husband should do this.
I'm sure you'll find it inevitable that Xiao Li's husband will cheat. How can a man put up with such a woman?
But it is such a silly and sweet Xiao Li who finally "pulls" her derailed husband!
Xiao Li's husband's cheating mistress is a partner he met when he was developing a new project in the company two years ago.
In the past two years, Xiao Li's husband has been busy with new projects, and his time with Xiao Li has been much less.
Xiao Li always thought that her husband did it for work and didn't take it to heart. Until one day, I passed by the study and heard my husband shouting inside, I miss you, too!
With a woman's only intuition, Xiao Li found that her husband was wrong, and immediately rushed into the study, scaring her husband who was buried in the phone. After that, Xiao Li and her husband had a big fight.
After that, Xiao Li made a scene, only to find that her husband and Xiao San were getting deeper and deeper. On one occasion, under the impulse, Xiao Li also took the initiative to call Xiao San.
But Xiao San has been using Xiao Li's husband at work, saying that her husband is only a working relationship, so Xiao Li should not think too much.
After the quarrel failed, Xiao Li's husband became more and more disgusted with her and even mentioned divorce.
At this time, Xiao Li panicked and then came to me for consultation.
After understanding the status of Xiao Li and her husband, as well as her husband and younger generation, I found that Xiao Li ignored a question:
Even Xiao Li hasn't noticed that her husband has changed for so many years, and she is no longer the husband who married Xiao Li.
But Xiao Li has not changed, she is still Xiao Li ten years ago (this is caused by the inconsistent growth frequency of each couple in marriage, and the growth in marriage is very important to both men and women).
Xiao Li believes that dressing up beautifully every day besides going to work is her greatest love for her husband.
Because she thinks that as long as her face value is online and her figure is attractive enough, it is impossible for her husband to cheat. Many original mistresses who think that men cheat are beautiful, but the perfect original will always meet men who are not as good as their mistresses.
What's more, Xiao Li feels that her husband can be what he is today. As a leader, he also relies on his mother's help.
But Xiao Li forgot one thing. Mom has retired to the second line now, and her husband's wings are slowly hardening!
So take Xiao Li as an example. I spent nearly three weeks at first to help Xiao Li realize what his current state is, and then guide Xiao Li.
Slowly change your self-awareness. Finally, through the promotion of self-growth, Xiao Li slowly changed from the previous silly sweetness to a grinding goblin!
First of all, I helped Xiao Li realize that his present environment is not as bad as he imagined.
In fact, because she is currently emotional, she has been staring at her husband and mistress, not only tossing her husband, but also tossing herself.
Because she was unwilling, she thought about how a beautiful contemporary woman could be cheated by her husband.
But the fact is, it's not that you don't want to cheat, and you can't meet Excellence.
Every adult who is physically and mentally healthy, especially in the dull period of marriage, will have a heart ready to move (according to scientists' research, everyone has an infidelity gene, and human beings are polygamous, which is human nature). As long as you meet the right opportunity and the right person, cheating is inevitable.
Secondly, when Xiao Li gradually realized the objective problem of cheating, she found that in the last four or five years, especially after the children went to kindergarten, her attention to her husband decreased.
They haven't sat together for a long time to have a good chat, and they don't know what state their husband is in the busy project in the last two years.
When my husband comes home, he not only occasionally talks with San Xiao about his work on the phone, but also talks about things in each other's lives after the phone call.
Generally speaking, it is because of the lack of communication between the two recently that mistress can take advantage.
As we all know, if your other half meets the opposite sex who can chat with him, it is inevitable that the feelings will change slowly (because many couples lack communication after marriage, leading to the lack of feelings of the other half, and then cheating).
Therefore, we should guide Xiao Li and her husband to gradually increase their daily communication. There is no need to talk every day, but you must find a suitable time to talk to your husband for about half an hour every week, so you can talk about work, children, family and so on.
Because Xiao Li and her husband had a good emotional foundation before, her husband was very happy when Xiao Li took the initiative to chat with him and his mood was stable.
Slowly, Xiao Li found that her husband had recently reported some work progress to her on his own initiative.
Finally, in Xiao Li's consultation, the most crucial point is emotional management.
Because of Xiao Li's previous emotional behavior, Xiao San knows what kind of person Xiao Li is, and it is easier for Xiao San to constantly use green tea to behave like Xiao Li's husband.
During the consultation, Xiao Li met something about the most green tea in San Xiao.
San Xiao is an older married woman who lives apart from her husband, so San Xiao has been asking Xiao Li's husband to help find a famous doctor in the local hospital to adjust her body.
Moreover, when Xiao Li was at work, she "bumped into" her husband because she forgot to bring her certificate halfway home, and took Xiao San at home.
At that time, Xiao Li saw the explosion immediately, and called her husband's brother, sister-in-law, parents and other relatives to ask her husband why.
But at that time, my husband just took San Xiao home to make millet porridge for her, because San Xiao's stomach was upset.
At that time, Xiao San also assured Xiao Li and her relatives that she and Xiao Li's husband were just friends and colleagues, nothing, and they looked pitiful.
Even relatives think that Xiao San really has nothing to do with Xiao Li's husband.
But it's not too small. She feels that her husband is getting more and more outrageous, and her mistress is getting more and more shameless and must get a divorce.
After communicating with me at that time, I asked Xiao Li to calm down first, because the situation at that time could not prove that her husband was cheating, only that Xiao San did come to the meeting and gradually disintegrated the relationship between Xiao Li and her husband.
Xiao Li really had a big fight in front of Xiao San that day, and "strongly" asked her husband to sign the divorce agreement she wrote (at that time, in order not to let Xiao Li's impulse end, Xiao Li was guided to do so, mainly to give Xiao Ali a way out, but also to increase the divorce cost when her husband was sensible afterwards).
The latter things took a turn for the worse, because after Xiao Li's trouble, her husband finally admitted that he was in love with Xiao San and wanted to divorce Xiao Li. At this point, Xiao Li was holding the agreement of "going out clean" in his hand, and his heart was also settled a lot, because she knew that the man had left and she still had money. In her present state, it is not difficult to remarry! Such self-confidence is the result of the cognitive change I gave Xiao Li in the consultation. Women should never take men too seriously in marriage, just learn to make good use of them.
After the last uproar, Xiao Li's husband and Xiao Li finally slept in separate rooms and lived in a small attic downstairs.
I lived for two months at a time. In daily life, Xiao Li is air. I only cook breakfast for children, but Xiao Li usually doesn't. This is the place where Xiao Li was most injured.
For so many years, she has been used to eating breakfast cooked by her husband every day. At this time, my plan to guide Xiao Li's self-growth began.
Xiao Li is slowly learning to do housework, making the family more and more like a small family, and letting parents try not to do housework at home;
I also increased my internal learning, read a lot of psychological books recommended by me, understood my inner psychological needs, and learned how to protect the boundaries of married women in front of parents, husbands and children.
Every day when my husband comes home, he can hear the laughter of Xiao Li and his children. Slowly, her husband will also take the initiative to participate in her chat with the children, and will also take the initiative to ask the family to go out to the movies on weekends. On weekends, he will invite other friends to take their children to the countryside.
Only Xiao Li and I know this bitter process from separation to relaxation of family relations.
Later, less than a month after the end of the consultation relationship, Xiao Li came to give me good news!
My husband sent her flowers on Valentine's Day this year, and they went out on a date that night, and proposed to return to the family and didn't want to be separated from Xiao Li, hoping that Xiao Li would give her a chance.
As for green tea mistress, according to Xiao Li, she has been transferred from the project team by the company, and only Xiao Li knows the reason.
I'm still that sentence:
There is no need for divorce if you cheat in marriage. Divorce can't solve your problems, but you need to find out the problems in your marriage through the infidelity of your other half, so that professionals can help you solve them as soon as possible.
The sooner the better, the longer the delay, the more you will push the other half out, or both of them will spend too much until the divorce!
If you don't want to get a final divorce, you can trust me privately. With free professional consultation, I will tell you how to operate the marriage correctly ~