1, when you encounter disappointment and difficulties, you will be confused, lose your direction and complain;
2, can calm down quickly and not be disturbed;
3. Not only don't be disturbed, but also continue to move towards the goal;
4. Appreciate hardships and gain ability from them. Many times, what you need is not to prove yourself, let alone criticize and blame yourself, but to accept and care for yourself.
? Life is a journey you can choose. When you make a choice beyond ordinary people and can't see the foothold of interests, the opposition around you will come like a hurricane. It's not easy to gain a foothold. Listen to your inner voice. No matter whether others object or agree, you always have to go by yourself. ?
? The first position, so all the ups and downs are the source of increasing my wisdom and strength. The second goal: stick to your goal. For me, the real success in life is to be able to quickly return to inner peace and harmony in all situations. Therefore, I will spend time and energy to take care of myself and create a way out. Will not be immersed in helplessness for a long time. ?
? Life is not seeking longevity, but taking shortcuts. Life must be savored, precipitated, paid and created by itself. Life is too short, don't let yourself down, let fate down! Waiting, relying and wanting is a begging life. Live the life you choose, maybe bitter, maybe tired, maybe no one understands. As long as you know that you are right, you will go forward bravely, because the saddest thing in life is: never choose, always be arranged. ?
? When you pin your hopes on others-you will choose to wait; When you pin your hopes on yourself, you will choose to run. (forwarding)?
? I like people who are grateful and travel alone. I know how to thank my parents, but I don't blindly follow them. I know how to thank heaven and earth, but I'm not afraid. Know how to thank yourself, but not narcissism. Know how to thank your friends, but don't rely on them. I know how to thank every seed, every breeze, and I know how to sow early and walk against the wind. -Bi Shumin
? Any visible behavior is just the tip of the iceberg. The directly visible part floating on the water only accounts for 20% of the iceberg volume. ?
? Generally speaking, there are two reasons why it is difficult to choose: one is that I don't know what I really want, and the other is that I am afraid of ignoring one thing, so I spend a lot of time struggling and hesitating. It's like a person at the foot of the mountain, always struggling which mountain to go to, and as a result, he didn't go up any mountain. If you know your needs and goals, then choose the direction that is conducive to achieving your goals; If it is difficult to distinguish the pros and cons for the time being, choose one of them decisively and focus on the goal after choosing, which becomes the correct choice in action.
? True freedom is to be yourself, say whatever you want and do whatever you want.
There is no need to conceal, affirm, agree or please.
When you find your place, others will naturally locate your relations. ?
? Dear, if you feel that the road ahead is difficult, whether it is the road of career, love, children's education or income, you should tell yourself that hardship means that you are still striving for progress, and the easy road is generally downhill. As long as the direction is right, it depends on how many roads have been taken, not how far it takes to get there. Hold on, don't give up, you will reach the top of the mountain one day. Give yourself a rest when you are tired, and don't compare with others.
? Four rules of making friends
1, know a person, don't listen to what he says, but look at what he does.
2. Look at his attitude towards emotion, money and difficulties.
3. See how he treats the little people around him.
4, especially how to face these aspects when getting along with you.
The true quality of people will only be truly reflected if these three aspects are touched. If you don't know these three people, you can't really know them. If you are disappointed in people, it is because you regard appearances as everything.
? The ultimate beauty of life is your ability to face the storm. The ability to face wind and rain is: in every disappointment,
1 Did you spend your energy and time comforting and caring for yourself soon instead of complaining about others and the environment?
After emotional stability, actively try to solve obstacles and problems.
Find opportunities to ask yourself what you have gained and what you need to learn and grow.
4. Have new knowledge, discovery, knowledge and ability, and make unremitting efforts.
Everything in life is the result of creation.
? Three communication tools, walk into each other's hearts
1. Understand each other's thoughts, wishes and needs, not to let them know your needs in a hurry, not to vent your dissatisfaction, not to criticize or accuse.
2, is to concentrate on listening, from the other side's point of view to feel why he/she thinks, says, and does so, to give understanding and warmth, rather than waiting for a chance to refute.
3. It is to enhance mutual harmony and intimacy, not to prove who is right and who is wrong.
When people pursue their ideals, they don't have to meet like-minded people to get on the road. They often meet like-minded people on the road. Success is a process of continuous accumulation and attraction. They are buttonwood trees. They are the sea and rivers.
Decide to move forward, and like-minded people will walk with you. Often at the beginning, there are many people in the same industry. Go ahead and you will know who is really like-minded. ?
Four steps to cope with the upcoming mood:
(1) Stop.
When you are in a bad mood, find a place where no one can disturb you and stay quietly with yourself.
(2) Listen to your body guidance and feel your body.
Following the guidance of your body, you may want to cry, say, shout, hit or hug yourself. In short, on the premise of not hurting yourself and others, you can move your body as you like until you feel comfortable.
Understand that the body is smarter than our brain in many cases.
(3) Ask yourself what needs are not met and how to meet them. Especially how to satisfy yourself without relying on others.
(4) Make an action plan and put it into action.
These four steps can help you explore the reasons behind emotions and find the direction that needs to be changed, instead of spending time and energy on emotions.
There is a certain rule: no one will do what you want, so what you think is a dream, and what you hope is a dream. The best and most effective thing you can do for yourself is to change yourself, change your expectations, stick to your goals and get closer step by step. Most of the pain in life comes from the gap between reality and expectation, and the only way to get rid of this gap is to lower expectations and change reality. Nothing will change without moving.
? When you evaluate yourself,
This may make you feel better:
1 Put your right hand in front of your heart.
2. Take a deep breath
Say to yourself: I am not satisfied with myself, and dissatisfaction is also a part of life. I accept my dissatisfaction with myself and believe that I made the best choice at that moment.
In the future, I will change what I can and become smarter.
I will try to get close to what I want. ?
? [Non-competitive wisdom]
Many pains in life are caused by blind competition. Therefore, you should have indisputable wisdom, which includes three aspects:
First, don't compete with yourself, be casual with yourself. You should recognize your talent and temperament, find the position that suits you best in the world, and don't compare with others.
Second, don't compete with others, but follow others. You have to understand whether there is fate between people, and the depth of fate is basically certain. In every specific situation, we should have a general idea and don't force anyone.
Third, don't compete with God, but obey God. You should remember that people can't control their own destiny, but they can control their attitude towards fate and accept the inevitable encounter that falls on their heads. -Zhou
? The truly interesting soul, not only when life is smooth sailing, it can live a poetic life of daily necessities, but also after experiencing Qian Fan, it dares to face up to the bleak life, turn the triviality of a chicken feather into a joke, wave its sleeves and make the world broad and full of affection. ?
? Please think about it: who is the person in this world who can accompany you from birth to death? Yes, I believe many people will think that person is themselves after seeing this question. Except you, no one can fully understand all your joys and sorrows, you and your dreams, and no one can fully understand your needs and grievances, and always put your feelings first. Therefore, a person's real possible soul mate and supporter at any time is only himself.
? When people encounter unpleasant things, the common reactions are confrontation, evasion and falling into why it's me. These are all impossible reactions and painful roads. Next time, can we try a new method: no matter who we meet, we just need to ask ourselves three questions:
1. What did I get from it?
2. What do I need to grow?
What can I do next?
? The greatest sorrow in life is poor thinking. Everything is unfair, unfair, and can't be found. No matter what the situation is, no matter what you have, your heart will be bitter. If you stare at what you don't have, you will only feel helpless, hopeless, sad and sad. In fact, everything that happens in this world contains rich treasures and resources. The key is what you see and what you gain. ? -Dr. Blue Ocean
? Everyone has arranged everything, how much money to earn, how big a house to live in, what car to buy and what to do after retirement. And life shuttles between sudden and unexpected, and no one knows when it will come to an abrupt end. Sometimes we are not given the opportunity to change, to express love, to say sorry and to say goodbye, leaving only endless regrets and regrets. Every thought, speech and behavior at the moment determines how much warmth we can take away and how much regret we leave behind.
? "You must let go of the past and move on." ~ Forrest Gump
? Behind a person's counterintuitive reaction, there is generally an unknown past and past pain. If you feel that you are sometimes unreasonable, you must not judge yourself in a hurry, but accompany yourself and care for yourself. Behind these actions, there is a self eager to be cared for. ?
? actual self
Many people are confused about what an inner child is.
When we were young, because our needs were not met and comforted by being loved, encouraged, seen, understood and traumatized by external events, we formed a hidden, sensitive and fragile self inside, just like a child who has not yet grown up. When you are an adult, once you encounter setbacks or your needs are not met, this inner child will be stimulated, thus immersed in pain and suffering from various emotions. Generally speaking, you are lonely, helpless, scared, sad and depressed. It is the self that needs to be healed, because these emotions cause us to struggle and suffer in relationships.
? How do you react when you are angry?
Passive expression:
1. Avoid contradictions and blame yourself.
2. Yield and obey
3. It doesn't matter, as if it doesn't matter.
Active expression:
1, belittle or insult others
2. Self-righteous and arrogant
3, language, physical attacks and injuries
Do you see your own shadow on it? ?