As long as you stop treating these behaviors as favors or concessions, you won't feel the need to respond with kindness or concessions. -"influence"
3. The best way to prevent others from using the principle of reciprocity to pressure us to obey is not to refuse others' initial goodwill. On the contrary, we should confidently accept the initial goodwill or concession, but once it is proved that the other party is not out of goodwill, we need to be prepared to redefine its behavior. -"influence"
4. The person who makes the request starts with an extreme request that is sure to be rejected, and then retreats to a smaller request, that is, the goal he originally wanted to achieve. The latter request may be accepted by the other party because it looks like a concession. Studies have shown that refusal? Retreat strategy can not only improve the probability of the other party's commitment, but also improve the probability of the other party fulfilling this requirement in the future. -"influence"
Another method is to use the principle of reciprocity to improve the obedience probability of others. This method makes a small adjustment to the basic theme: instead of giving benefits first and then pushing others to return, it makes concessions first and stimulates others to make concessions. This obedience procedure is called refusal? Retreat strategy, also known as? Save face? Method, this method mainly depends on the pressure of return concession. -"influence"
6. The fear of losing something seems to stimulate people's actions more than the desire to get the same thing. -"influence"
7. To protect yourself from the negative influence of authority, you might as well ask yourself two questions: Is this authority a real expert? Is this expert telling the truth? The first question turns our attention from the symbol of authority to the real evidence to prove his qualification; The second question suggests not only paying attention to authoritative knowledge, but also considering its credibility from the environment at that time. -"influence"
8. Title can influence others' behavior more than the nature of the party concerned. -"influence"
9. Bad news can infect the unknown. People naturally hate people who bring bad news, even if the informer has nothing to do with it. Whether it is a good thing or a bad thing, as long as it is accidentally connected with us, it will affect people's feelings about us. -"influence"
10, causing discord is very simple: divide the participants into groups, let them spontaneously form a sense of small circle, then mix them together and bake them with competitive flames. -"influence"
1 1. Halo effect means that a positive characteristic of a person can guide others to look at this person. We will automatically add some positive characteristics to good-looking people, such as talent, kindness, honesty and intelligence. And when we make these judgments, we don't realize the role of physical attractiveness. -"influence"
12. Compliant employees widely use the bond of preference among their friends, which shows how powerful the preference principle is in urging people to agree to the request. In fact, we find that these professionals can benefit from this principle even if there is no ready-made friendship to use. In this case, they use a fairly direct obedience strategy to take advantage of the preference bond: let's like them first. -"influence"
13. When you need emergency assistance, your best strategy is to reduce uncertainty, let people around you notice your situation and find out your responsibility. Explain as accurately as possible what kind of help you need, and don't let bystanders judge for themselves, because especially among people, the principle of social identity and the multiple ignorance effects caused by it are likely to make them think that your situation is not urgent. -"influence"
14. In the process of examining others' reactions and eliminating uncertainties, it is easy to overlook a subtle and important fact: others may also be looking for social evidence. Especially when the situation is ambiguous, everyone tends to observe what others are doing, which will lead to a phenomenon called? Multiple ignorance? Interesting phenomenon. -"influence"
15. If you want to judge what kind of person a person is through observation, you must carefully examine his behavior. Researchers have found that people themselves rely on the same way: observing behavior to judge themselves. Behavior is the main source of information that determines one's beliefs, values and attitudes. -"influence"
16. In order to find and resist the improper influence of consistency pressure on decision-making, we should listen to the signals from two parts of the body, the stomach and the depths of the soul. -"influence"
17. Therefore, even if the conditions that stimulate people to make a commitment change, the commitment can last for a long time. This phenomenon explains why it is like. Throw the ball low? Deceptive obedience techniques such as these will be effective. -"influence"
18, made a commitment decision, even if it is wrong, there is a tendency of self-continuation, because they can? Grow your own legs? . In other words, people often look for new reasons and excuses to prove the wisdom of their promises. -"influence"
19, it is most important to conform to the industry and ensure the initial heart. When people make a commitment, that is, stand firm, they will be more willing to agree to the requirements consistent with their previous commitments. Therefore, many compliance experts will find ways to induce people to stand in a position in advance, which is consistent with their later requirements and requirements. -"influence"
20. However, not all commitments can lead to concerted action equally effectively. The most effective commitment is to be positive, open, hard-working, heartfelt and not forced by anyone. -"influence"
2 1. Many times, when we judge a thing, we don't use all available relevant information. On the contrary, we only used the most representative one of all the information. Although it is easy to make stupid decisions based on isolated data, the pace of modern life requires us to use this shortcut frequently. -"influence"
22. It is more dangerous to give a little and take it away than not to give it at all. If the government wants to improve the position of the traditionally oppressed group politically and economically, the problem comes: by doing so, this group has gained unprecedented freedom, and once someone tries to deprive them, the government is bound to pay a painful price. -"influence"
23. When it comes to the impact of information censorship on the audience, the most intriguing thing is not that the audience is more eager for this information than before, but that people have become more accepting and tolerant of the information they can't get. -"influence"
24. We can basically judge the quality of a thing quickly and accurately according to the difficulty of obtaining it. If there are fewer and fewer opportunities, our freedom will be lost, and we hate to lose the freedom we originally had. The desire to maintain vested interests is the core of psychological inversion theory. -"influence"
25. From an evolutionary point of view? Avoid losses? Take precedence over? Make a profit? There is a theory that can explain this: if people have enough resources to survive, the increase of resources is just icing on the cake, but the decrease of resources may be fatal. Therefore, in adaptive evolution, people become extremely sensitive to losses. -"influence"
26. First, the principle of reciprocity is extremely powerful. Usually, people are no match for those factors that will affect whether people comply with other people's requirements. Second, this principle is still valid even if the initial favor is imposed on others. In this way, we can't take the initiative to decide who we want to owe, and the choice falls to others. -"influence"
27. Third, this principle can promote unequal exchange. In order to eliminate the disturbing sense of debt, people often agree to a request that is much bigger than before. -"influence"
According to sociologists and anthropologists, the principle of reciprocity embodies the most universal and basic norms of human culture. This principle holds that we should strive to repay what others give us. The principle gives the recipient the obligation to repay in the future. In this way, people can boldly give things to others without worrying about their own losses. -"influence"
29. A well-known principle of human behavior holds that if you can give a reason when asking others for help, the probability of success will be greater. -"influence"
30. Most compliance processes, which stimulate one person to comply with another person's requirements, can be understood from the perspective of people's automatic and quick response. In our culture, most individuals have established a set of trigger characteristics of obedience, which are some specific information. Usually, they can tell us when it is right and beneficial to obey other people's demands. Every trigger feature of obedience may become an influence weapon to stimulate people to agree to the request. -"influence"
brief Introduction of the content
Politicians use influence to win elections, businessmen use influence to sell goods, and salesmen use influence to lure you to wait and see. Even your friends and family will unconsciously use their influence on you. But why, when a request is made in different ways, your reaction will change from passive resistance to active cooperation?
In this book, psychologist Robert? b？ Dr. Siodini explained to us why some people are persuasive and we are always gullible. The six psychological secrets hidden behind impulsive obedience to others are the root of all this. Those persuasion experts always use them skillfully to bring us to heel.
Brief introduction of the author
Robert? b？ Robert B. Cialdini is a world-famous authority on persuasion and influence research. He received his Ph.D. and postdoctoral degrees from the University of North Carolina and Columbia University respectively, and devoted himself to the study of persuasion and obedience behavior for more than three years. He is currently a professor of psychology at Arizona State University.