Most men and women who enter marriage are the result of feelings to a certain extent. Marriage with emotional foundation comes from growing old together. But do couples who get separated when they walk just because they have no feelings? Emotion is an aspect that affects the relationship between husband and wife, and there are many factors that directly or indirectly lead to the breakdown of marital feelings! Xiao Jing, the daughter of my colleague's elder sister, is a doctor. She worked hard in her career when she was young, but she was a little old when she settled down to think about getting married. Enthusiastic colleagues set up Lei Ming, a male doctor in the same hospital. Lei Ming took part in local work as a volunteer in the mainland. He is down-to-earth, capable and dedicated, and is highly praised by leading colleagues. Due to limited family conditions, I can't buy a wedding room. My colleague's eldest sister is an only child. To prepare a wedding room, as long as two people really love each other and work together.
Shortly after their marriage, Lei Ming and Xiao Jing discussed going to the countryside to take care of their parents. Xiaojing didn't want to embarrass Lei Ming, but she agreed! The new parents-in-law are a little uncomfortable with city life. Xiao Jing and Lei Ming take the old man out for a walk in their spare time. As usual, Xiao Jing cooks, Lei Ming washes dishes and cleans, but after a long time, her parents-in-law will strengthen their belts and her father-in-law is waiting for food and drink. As for the mother-in-law, as long as her son works, she will grab it immediately. Xiaojing will pretend not to see it when he is busy. Busy at work, I used to order takeout or go out for dinner, but everything changed after my in-laws came. Suddenly, two more people were waiting, and Xiao Jing was miserable. After a long time, Lei Ming is also used to chatting with his parents after work. Seeing Xiao Jing busy, he stopped helping. Xiao Jing will complain and occasionally quarrel. In-laws stand on their son's side: men do great things. What's wrong with women doing more? What happened? Xiaojing's job title and salary are higher than Lei Ming's, and her resentment sometimes breaks out!
The most unbearable thing is that every time I wash clothes, my in-laws let me wash Lei Ming first. The reason is that men are heaven! Fuck you! Xiao Jing resisted strongly for the first time, packed her things and went back to her family. Originally, Lei Ming wanted to apologize to her mother-in-law and take Xiao Jing back, but his parents suggested that she calm down and come back in a few days!
Half a month has passed, and Lei Ming hasn't come to pick her up. During this period, Xiao Jingsi took a lot of exams and reflected on the combination with Lei Ming. Parents also objectively helped analyze the cause and effect. Finally, Xiao Jing filed for divorce and ended this marriage less than a year.
Xiao Jing was injured in this marriage and paid too much!
Xiao Jing and Lei Ming are not lovers with strong feelings, but at least they are both highly educated and of the same age, and they have common topics. There should be no problem in a quiet life. The key is the arrival of parents, which shows Lei Ming's true three views-men are superior to women!
The conclusion of thinking and liberation:
In the relationship between husband and wife, apart from feelings, there is also the influence of family background, which is a deep-rooted concept. It is not only emotional fragility that affects the relationship between husband and wife and leads to divorce, but also the problem of three views! Advise the handsome men and beautiful women who are about to enter the marriage hall that the marriage should be well matched and evenly matched, at least close to the family, and the happy life of the family will affect the next generation. Happiness index, the love style of young couples, is deeply influenced by their family background. Different ideas have different love styles! Treat people like a day for ten years, saying nothing but rarely. The emotional foundation between husband and wife is inseparable from money, and too much money leads to emotional instability.
Some couples really have no feelings after divorce, and some couples are just deadlocked after divorce.
First, there is no affection between husband and wife, which is roughly manifested in the following four points:
1. Husband and wife have been separated for a long time, and there is no husband and wife life.
Everyone who has been married knows that sex life is the "way" for couples to have children and one of the ways for couples to communicate their feelings. If there is a stable and harmonious sex life between husband and wife, the feelings will be very harmonious. Even if there is a small contradiction between husband and wife, it is also "a quarrel at the head of the bed and a quarrel at the end of the bed" and "the husband and wife have no overnight hatred". If they sleep at night and get up in the morning, they will be fine. What should they do with their lives?
However, once the husband and wife are separated, it shows that there is something wrong with their lives, that is to say, their lives can no longer satisfy one or both parties, so separation occurs.
"Husband and wife can never get tired of watching", because they love each other, appreciate each other and are attached to each other. If the two people are separated and have no husband and wife life, it means that the relationship between husband and wife has reached the point where "the left hand touches the right hand and there is no feeling at all".
The relationship between husband and wife needs communication and communication, and sexual life is the most direct and simple way for husband and wife to communicate their feelings. If there is no sexual life between husband and wife, there is no relationship between husband and wife.
2. The indifference and indifference between husband and wife
The lack of affection between husband and wife also includes indifference, ignoring everything about each other, and even having nothing to say in the cold war.
Husband and wife are under the same roof, together every day. You can also say that you don't see it and look up. If the relationship between husband and wife is good, their relationship will not be a big problem. If husband and wife don't care about each other and each other's affairs, such a relationship won't last at all.
3. The income of husband and wife is opaque
Husband and wife are a family, and income and expenditure should be transparent. At the very least, husband and wife should discuss and decide with each other. If the husband and wife "hide anything" and control their own money, it may not be a big deal if they have money at home. If the family income is tight, the marriage will go wrong sooner or later.
4. One or both spouses have an affair.
When husband and wife live together, they should be loyal and trust each other. Once husband and wife lose trust and loyalty, marriage will exist in name only, and marriage will fall apart irretrievably.
Extramarital affairs are the reasons for the failure of many marriages and the main reasons for the divorce of many couples.
Personally, I think the above four reasons are the main reasons why couples have no feelings.
Some couples have always had a good relationship, but they quarreled over something. Because the husband and wife are deadlocked, no one wants to give in and no one wants to admit their mistakes, so they divorced.
In this case, although the husband and wife divorced, but the husband and wife calm down and think about it, there is no big deal at all, just trivial things, and the husband and wife still have a chance to make up.
There are many reasons for divorce between husband and wife, and there are roughly five kinds:
1. Extramarital affairs
2. Financial disputes
There are different opinions about educating children.
4. The problem of supporting the elderly
5. Various chores at home
Husband and wife are destined to be together, feelings need to be managed, and they need tolerance and understanding. As long as both husband and wife put their feelings in the position of 1 and put everything else in the second place, there will be no problem with their feelings.
This conclusion is too arbitrary. There are the following categories of divorced people.
(1) From love to hate, it is a torture to continue. This kind of divorced men and women, generally in the majority of free love. At the beginning, they loved each other to the death, but because both sides only presented the best side to each other, they lacked sufficient rational prediction of the difficulties and inevitability after living together. Finally, I found out that the other person was not my type at all.
There is still a feeling, but not much. This type is mostly female. Generally speaking, men are worse, and the bad here includes but is not limited to personality and way of doing things. Have a plenty of introduction marriage, have a plenty of free love marriage. Because women are kind or cowardly, they have been making excuses for themselves and giving men opportunities. In fact, it is already possible to divorce, dragging it aside.
The relationship is not bad, divorced for other reasons. In this type, the most common thing is that music parents or in-laws are too involved in the family life of young couples, which leads them to choose divorce. We are the most common type of men in Ma Bao. There is nothing wrong with the relationship between the young couple because he listens to his mother too much, and her mother thinks that her daughter-in-law robbed her son. This kind of divorce is usually caused by the contradiction between one of the young couples and one of the parents.
There is nothing wrong with it, just to avoid the "fake divorce" of the policy. What we do most is to avoid the city's purchase restriction policy and rely on debt. I won't explain too much.
Emotion is not the most important factor in marriage!
I'm glad to answer this question.
Divorce between husband and wife due to emotional problems is only one aspect, and there will be other reasons.
What is the essence of husband and wife? What I understand is that two people are combined because of the same interests, as a contract form of team life!
As for feelings, I think so. Not only husband and wife, anyone who gets along with others for a long time, stays together every day and develops the same living habits will have feelings. Divorce between husband and wife because they have no feelings is only one aspect. In real life, it's complicated. There are other reasons for divorce.
One, three views are inconsistent.
Getting along with people begins with the five senses and ends with three views. When you are in love, you see the advantages of each other. The so-called beauty is in the eyes of the lover, and there are many external things. But to really live together, we need to have the same direction in life and need mutual tolerance and understanding. Different views are a very troublesome thing. For example, two people can't eat and play together, their habits of living together are out of sync, and their thoughts are diametrically opposed, so they are likely to fail.
Second, the pace is inconsistent.
This is the basic principle of primitive marriage. At first I thought it was too old-fashioned, too old-fashioned There are often scenes on TV where Cinderella falls in love with the prince. But later I learned that two people in the same class and living in the same state get along better.
Everyone's family background, growth experience, education level, perspective and way of thinking are different. People in the same class, the same life level and the same circle are easier to get along with.
For example, both of them are highly educated and like to keep learning, urge each other and make progress together. If a person keeps improving, he will die every day. It is difficult for two people with different attitudes and goals to live together. Over time, there will be various problems.
Third, family reasons.
Love is a matter for two people, and marriage is a matter for two families. Mutual understanding between two families in life is also very important, and the gap is too big, or one party depends on the other and keeps asking for it, which is also very problematic.
There is another situation, that is, the elderly interfere too much with the independent life of husband and wife, or they are old and not independent. This kind of couple has a big problem.
Fourth, because of money, houses.
Modern society is a society with material division, and more and more things can be solved with money. There are too many divorced couples because of money, houses and so on. Because one party is too poor, or because of the contradiction of house ownership, there are not a few divorces.
In short, divorce, because no feelings is just one aspect, marriage life involves too many aspects, feelings, interests and so on.
1. Money factor: economic pressure or material temptation. 2. Feelings are weak. 3. The influence of family background.
There are indeed couples who divorce not because of feelings, but because of
It is difficult for old people who live together for a long time to break housework, and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law cannot be handled well. There will be misunderstandings between sons. The daughter-in-law feels wronged, and the mother-in-law feels that the daughter-in-law is not kind, which makes the couple unhappy and affects the relationship between husband and wife. My son feels that his daughter-in-law is not accommodating enough, and her mother-in-law always says that her daughter-in-law is not. As a result, the young couple divorced. This is a relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law that has not evolved for thousands of years.
The reasons for divorce are different for everyone and cannot be generalized.
No feelings is just one of them, and it is also the most commonly used cover.
The three views are different, from the concept of educating children to the concept of family management. Small to different eating habits, you think he likes snoring and you like farting. . .
Feelings run through it, and great feelings can cover up these differences. Fragile feelings may only make things worse.
In short, if two people are extremely unhappy and want to die of depression, then leave as early as possible, and it is important to save their lives!
Marriage is sustained by many factors. Therefore, the divorce of husband and wife is not only the loss of feelings.
It is common for us that some people obviously divorced, but after a period of time they lived together again, indicating that their feelings have not completely broken down.
And some people love their other half very much, knowing that the other half is also good for themselves. But I just didn't want to suffer with the other half, and finally chose money between feelings and money.
Some people choose to divorce because of the disharmony between husband and wife.
Others have irreconcilable conflicts with the other half of the family and choose to divorce.
……。
In short, there are many reasons for divorce, and lack of feelings is just one of them.