Mei Ting is my sister in the university club. She met her ex-husband, Brother Qiang, at an off-campus activity in her freshman year. It is said that Brother Qiang opened several restaurants outside the school at that time, and spent most of his time running restaurants, so naturally he didn't pay much attention to his studies. Mei Ting is going to marry him as soon as he graduates.
Mei Ting is a northerner and the only child in her family. She is white and sweet, and her height is nearly 1.7 meters. When I first met Brother Qiang, I was full of curiosity about this paunchy man who looks like a dwarf wax gourd. If I hadn't seen him preparing his graduation thesis defense, I would have regarded him as a gangster in the movie.
Brother Qiang cannot do without the word "money". He likes to show off his achievements and experiences in front of our sisters. He invited us to dinner the day he got his degree certificate. He said that if his new work unit doesn't need this diploma, he won't have to ask people everywhere to give gifts to his tutor. We met several times, and we didn't have a good impression of him, but Mei Ting always looked at him sideways.
Mei Ting often tells us how capable and ambitious he is. She is full of fantasies about this first love. Although I don't like Brother Qiang, I keep silent about their relationship.
In the year of graduation in 2005, Mei Ting and Brother Qiang entered the marriage hall. Brother Qiang said at the wedding that he would treat Mei Ting well for life, and our sisters, as bridesmaids, also witnessed their good marriage.
Brother Qiang is from Zhuzhou. Shortly after the marriage, Mei Ting became pregnant. She and Brother Qiang live in two bedrooms and one living room in this city. 600 thousand when the house was bought. At that time, Mei Ting's parents paid a down payment of 200,000 yuan, but only Brother Qiang's name was written on the property certificate. Mei Ting said she didn't care.
After the baby was born, Mei Ting's in-laws moved in with them in the name of taking care of the baby. Five people live in a house of less than 70 square meters, and the physical space is narrow. Two generations have different ideas about taking care of children, and there are constant frictions. Minor problems such as changing diapers and feeding complementary foods often escalate into adult attacks.
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Brother Qiang comes home very late every day. Later, he applied to the company for distribution to Guangdong branch, with an annual salary of more than 300 thousand and clean ears.
After the children went to kindergarten, Mei Ting found an administrative job in a company, and his income was only enough to support himself. Every month, her children spend a lot of money on school and life, but Mei Ting can't help. Her in-laws not only can't help, but also talk to her all day.
At that time, I had been working in Guangdong for several years, busy changing jobs, working overtime and getting married. When Mei Ting called to talk to me, I told her that you should give the children to your in-laws, move out by yourself, and ask your husband for living expenses. Didn't he get a raise?
Mei Ting's answer left me speechless for a moment: the cost of living there was too high, and there was not much left in a year. I'm embarrassed to ask him for it. I thought to myself, even if you spend a lot of money outside, you can't save a penny a year, can you? I reminded Mei Ting to pay more attention to Brother Qiang, and Mei Ting said that he believed him.
Mei Ting's parents came to Zhuzhou from their hometown. Her in-laws said, "We can't stay at home, let's stay in a hotel outside." Mei Ting was unhappy, and finally she took her parents to rent a house outside, saying that her living habits were different, so that everyone could live comfortably.
One night at 20 10, I got a call from Mei Ting when I came home from work. She cried and told me that Brother Qiang was cheating on me. The thing is, Brother Qiang hasn't called home for two months. Every time he calls, he is talking on the phone. She was very worried and came to Guangdong to find him herself. While waiting downstairs in the office, she found Brother Qiang and a woman, like lovers, hugging each other in the car. Seeing this scene, she froze for a while.
This is the second time. Six months ago, when Brother Qiang was at home, a girl came home pregnant. It turned out that he was dating that girl without telling her that he was married. When girls rush to get married, they can't hide.
Mei Ting is worried about her marriage and doesn't want to worry her in-laws. She didn't tell anyone about it, so they paid and they went on living. This time, Mei Ting chose to forgive again.
On 20 12, Brother Qiang filed for divorce on the grounds that Mei Ting didn't care about him and he didn't want to drag on. The wedding room I bought when I got married is now worth 2 million, and the mortgage has been paid off. Brother Qiang bought the Audi car after his marriage. Property distribution is as follows: the house and car are owned by Brother Qiang, and Brother Qiang gives Mei Ting 200,000 yuan in cash. At Mei Ting's insistence, the custody of the children belongs to her.
I asked Mei Ting, do you know this is a clean house? She said that she didn't want to argue with him, and there was no need to tear her face. I don't know why she still has face at this time. My attitude towards her: mourn her misfortune and anger her.
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Intimacy is a good opportunity for a person to know himself. Mei Ting asked me what I thought of her marriage. I made a few points:
1, there is nothing completely wrong or right in marriage. In this process, you have to see your own problems before you can change. The so-called profound lessons are ready to go.
2, don't be naive to live at the age of 20, have no understanding of human nature, have a weak personality and have no opinions.
From campus to marriage, you have experienced too few men, thinking that the one you want is the best in the world. Even if you are divorced, you should have confidence in the future and still believe in love.
I don't know if my words played a role, or if Mei Ting deeply reflected on his own problems. A year after learning from these mistakes, she started a blind date. During these experiences, she gained some insights, saying that she had re-recognized herself and her marriage.
Later, Mei Ting met a young psychologist who had never been married and worked hard in a 3A hospital. He felt very sorry for what happened to Mei Ting. Together, he not only helped Mei Ting out of the trauma caused by her previous marriage, but also gave her some suggestions on career development.
Mei Ting gradually changed his cowardly character and put all his thoughts on improving himself. One year later, he emerged in the unit, and two years later, he was promoted to the director of the personnel department, gaining a sense of accomplishment in his work and being reborn.
In the third year after the divorce, Mei Ting got married with her boyfriend, so she didn't have to worry about food, clothing, housing and transportation. When they are free, they take their children out to travel, which greatly relaxes their mood and makes them smile more and more. Seeing photos of a family playing in a circle of friends, my sister is also envious.