1, building trust (mind reading)
Key points: find the bright spot, narrow the distance and share the same frequency.
For the same frequency: both cards can be used (choose the card you like best and least).
For example, if the other party chooses:
My favorite card is: The more frustrated, the braver.
The least favorite card is: changeable mood.
Naturally, the same frequency is:
You can put yourself in a state that you like "being more frustrated and more brave" and don't like "changeable emotions". You don't need to be more professional, just the same frequency.
2, find the demand (heart)
Find the pain point and find the expectation. Focus on the key cards and amplify the pain and benefits (note: the amplification here is not out of thin air, but to make the other party realize the real problem. Many characters or personalities are yellow and have weak perception. Obviously, there is a problem and they don't think it is a problem at all; Obviously, the problem is serious. I didn't realize it. At this time, it is necessary to enlarge the seriousness of the problem and let the other party feel it. Red personality is prone to luck, but also needs to amplify the pain and let the other party realize the consequences of not changing.
Looking at the face of the card, we can feel that the owner of the card, Huang Taiduo, has done a lot of things but has not been recognized by the people around him, is not understood and is very wronged.
People who play cards can ask: If you have the ability, strength and like to share, you should be optimistic. How can you be pessimistic?
Interactive understanding of the basic situation of the card owner: the card owner is very capable and has some achievements in his career. However, there are great problems in the relationship between husband and wife and parent-child relationship. He is physically and mentally exhausted, so he has the card of "pessimism". Because of these relations, such a capable person is not interested in facing life and is not enthusiastic about his career at present, so he is frustrated and brave in the third row, which shows that his current sense of strength is very weak.
Digging the pain point of the card owner: Question: If your unhappiness and negative emotions are 10, what is your score now? The shopkeeper said it was eight points. If someone is so yellow and can say seven or eight, it must be more than seven or eight (because yellow is weak). If a red and green person can give a score of 10, it may be seven or eight. (Red will amplify the feeling)
One more question: how long can this state last? How long can it last in your life?
How much are you willing to pay if you want to change your present state? Time, energy, money.
At this time, the card owner may have resistance because of the difficulties in time, energy or money, and will show that he does not think his own problem is a problem, and consciously weaken the existing problem and think that the problem is not that big.
Keep asking: if you don't change this state?
Your resistance is ok, your self-protection ability is very strong, and you won't be hurt (all yellow people have this trait, whether it is congenital or acquired). But what about your children and your husband? Will your behavior be passed on to your children?
It can be like a case where parents unconsciously hurt their children and have a bad influence on them. Many cases can be shared in class. The owner of the card will bring the sense of touch.
At this point, you can give the card owner improvement plans and suggestions, and the card owner can listen.
The pain point card is: the heart is conservative, and the main reason for the card is influenced by the mother. I haven't cried for 20 years. In general, they are reluctant to express themselves.
Expectation card is "the thing that most needs others' approval", and others' approval is the source of his strength. The repressed red character is particularly easy to release and bloom in psychology lectures. Once the repression is released, the explosive force comes out.
Supplementary note: Expecting cards are not always in the last row. The experience shared by the teacher: if the blue and yellow leading cards are placed in the third row, they are expected cards, and the red and green leading cards are placed in the third row because they are forced, not expected cards.
3. Give a plan, not a direction.