Children have a pair of eyes to discover the world, take them to see the world and feel the surprise of growing up with them!
For education, Fu Yong, president of China Education Research Network, has his own understanding: "The ultimate goal of raising children is to enable them to live independently. The most effective way to protect children is to let them learn to take care of themselves. " The current educational environment attaches too much importance to exams, but in his view, education is not a machine for digging scores, a tool for further studies, or a ladder for job hunting, but a carrier for enriching, improving and perfecting oneself.
As the father of two children, Fu Yong has a unique training method. He doesn't value children's grades, doesn't force them to attend remedial classes, and even lets them not finish their homework. So what does he value? Is to take the children out, into nature, into the wilderness, floating on the sea in a boat fork, once you climb to the top of the mountain to peek, you can see it at a glance. He believes that only outdoors will children have more opportunities to experience and try, sharpen their viability and learn to be independent.
When he saw that the children who were supposed to be innocent and happy were overwhelmed by the so-called study all day, their eyes were dim, and the whole society was shrouded in utilitarian floating dust, falling into anxiety and irritability, but without real spiritual beliefs, he felt that he should make a difference.
Experience, grow ...
"Whether you like it or not, the child will leave us eventually. It is better to let go actively than to be separated passively. Let children be independent as soon as possible, which is the greatest love. " Fu Yong said. In Fu Yong's view, exam-oriented education only allows children to pursue scores, but ignores many more important qualities, especially the ability to survive, such as self-help and emergency response.
Through various natural and social experiences and challenges, children not only learn the ability to survive, but also understand the knowledge in textbooks more easily. Fu Yong said: "in terms of geographical knowledge, many children, such as contour lines, airflow, direction, scale calculation and so on." I may have studied in textbooks for a whole day and recited them for a semester, but I can't remember them or really understand them. It's different when you come here. In the wild mountains, everyone has a map and compass, and can see everything, otherwise they can't even find food and drink. This is the education we have to do. "
"What kind of baptism can cast what kind of soul. Whether your child can become a person with survival skills and independent personality depends largely on whether you give him a platform to hone. " Fu Yong said.
Not for exams, but for the future happiness of children.
"So far, as long as conditions permit, I walk at least 10 km every day. Now the physical condition of students really worries us. If we don't see the survey data, we may not imagine that the passing rate of college students' physical fitness test in China is less than 60%. "For the current physical condition of teenagers, Fu Yong said worriedly," Today's children can't breathe after running for one kilometer. I think so. Why compete? "Our bodies are gone, what happy future is there?"
In real life, the survival skills of primary and secondary school students are very poor, and they are basically stretched out by clothes. In Fu Yong's words, "I always feel that there is no risk at home and in a bustling city". Fu Yong has participated in several earthquake rescues and knows that when that kind of disaster comes, the disaster in a metropolis like Beijing will only get worse. "So our future training camp will teach you more survival skills, and it will be systematic and three-dimensional. Not only the four-day 100 km hike, but all the children finished it. Everyone has to walk through the scenery, including the wooden bridge.
Every child is a genius.
"Authoritarian parents will deliberately shape their children according to their own intentions, but they don't know how to respect their independent personality. Then, no matter how perfect their arrangement is, children will think that they are not living for themselves. " Fu Yong said that the most terrible thing is that they don't believe that children have the ability to create miracles. And practice will eventually tell these parents that every child is a genius.
"There is no accident in the world, and all the beginnings indicate the future direction. Instead of tirelessly urging children to study hard and get into a good university, it is better to help them form an independent personality, an optimistic attitude and good habits from an early age. " Fu Yong said, "What kind of child is in your heart, what kind of person he will grow up to be."
The little father decided to take his children out to play for a simple reason: "Because he watched the program" Where is Dad? ". "His father said he could take him out to play by himself, and then he went." Of course, my mother also has more ideas of her own: "I began to think about taking him out to play during the holidays, which can broaden my children's horizons." I also want to exercise children's self-reliance, interpersonal skills and language skills, which are good for memory and imagination. Besides, I have read a lot and written a lot. "
The beginning of the trip
When Ben was over one year old, his parents took him out to play. Mom and dad who took their children out for the first time mistakenly chose to join the league because they were inexperienced: "Suzhou and Shanghai. Because I am tired with the group, I get up early and go to bed late, which disrupts the law of life. The child is uncomfortable and will come back halfway. "
But mom and dad were not discouraged, which led Xiao Ben to go to Shandong at the age of 2, Hainan and Northeast China at the age of 3, and Qinghai and Tibet this year. There is no car pick-up, no plane cruise, and the main means of transportation for the trip is the train.
From then on, it was out of control. Because my mother was busy with work, my addicted father began to travel alone with Xiao Ben: "He checked his itinerary and left with his children."
Slow train time
Because Xiao Ben fell in love with the sea when traveling in Qingdao, his father decided to show Xiao Ben the southernmost sea in China and organized a 15-day trip to Hainan. Xiao Ben took the train for more than 20 hours for the first time.
At first, dad's idea was romantic. He wants to ride the train more freely, and the children stop to play where they want to go. You can play one stop at a time, so that children can slowly feel the differences of local customs. But it backfired: "A child in the car had a good time with Xiao Ben and went to Hainan by train."
Children's adaptability is far stronger than we thought. Xiao Ben's mother said: "The child is very strong now, and it's okay to go to more difficult places to play." Like the Arctic Village, it is extremely cold, and the frozen icicles in the bathroom are as high as the toilet. He didn't care, and said that he would go to the northeast to play with his father this year. "
Although the trip to the northeast is happy, only my father can bear hardships. My mother said, "I'm like a refugee when I come back. I can't stand it." Because it is cold, I dare not take a bath in Mohe, so the child can only be dirty. "
The little man who followed his father
Xiao Ben's father is a fashionable "full-time nanny". At that time, his father suspected that his mother could not take care of the children and cook well. "I was hungry to have children, and he was not careful." After the mother took maternity leave, the father resigned and concentrated on taking care of the children at home. Mom said Ben: "Being with dad is like a man, and it's manly."
It is also dangerous to go out to play: "skiing in the northeast, children slide directly down a ski slope several meters high." His father was afraid at that time, but he was not afraid at all. "
Xiao Ben's trip is all by himself. There are no good hotels. Dad's philosophy is: "living can be bad, eating can't be bad." Fruits, vegetables and rice must be both nutritious and clean. " Really tired, dad found an hourly room to let the child sleep for two hours. Or an early train, buy a berth ticket, and father and son can sleep comfortably for one night and play happily at the destination. And the luggage that father and son travel is just a few simple pieces. Dad seems to want to "have fun, nothing else matters".
The meaning of travel is meaningful.
After so many trips, in the words of my mother, Xiaoben "has undergone earth-shaking changes": "I used to be quiet and shy when I went out, because I met people on the train and played with children from all over the world. When children go out more, they learn to say hello. Now when you see a stranger looking at him, take the initiative to say hello. Go to the park and play with strange children quickly. I used to let my mother go, but now I am very outgoing. " Because many trips have formed a stable sense of security with my parents, Xiao Ben has never cried since he went to kindergarten.
Although only children and fathers go out to travel, mothers are not divorced from their children's growth, and "video chat every day". For father-son travel, mother actually has her own abacus: "They can go out clean and clean up at home alone."
In the west, running is also a parent-child activity, and traveling around the world with children is a very popular sport. Mr. Ning Ning and Mr. He not only took their children to participate in parent-child running activities around the world, but also personally organized parent-child running activities in China. They plan to spread this popular health activity abroad in China.
Lady: Why did you run with the children?
Ningning: When we were playing abroad, we found that westerners would take their children to run marathons, and the related activities were very mature. At that time, we went on a trip without children, but we thought we would take our children to such activities. In fact, children will be very happy to participate in such activities, and we don't think it's just running, it's more like a family activity. The participation of the whole family, working together for a goal and accomplishing the goal together are also inspiring and memorable for the growth of children.
Lady: How does parent-child running feel about children?
Ningning: We must get up early on the day of running. We must get up at 6 o'clock and have breakfast. At 8 o'clock, I will go to the scene to warm up and other preparatory activities. During the whole competition, the child experienced many things that he could not experience in other activities. As a parent, I think this activity is too meaningful. The children's reaction to this activity is very happy. He can say that he loves and hates this activity. He cherishes the medals he won. Back in Beijing, he couldn't wait to present a treasure to his grandparents and tell the story of his running. But that day was really tiring, hot, uncomfortable and hard for him. Later, we asked him if he still wanted to take part in the activities, but he still said yes and wanted to run more in the future.
Women's family emotion column