What kind of person and personality a child will become in the future is greatly influenced by the family environment, which has both positive and negative aspects. In addition, the family environment can be divided into material environment and spiritual environment. With the development of today's society, the material environment is generally superior, but there are also many problems in the spiritual environment that deserve our attention. In the family education environment, the influence of family atmosphere and family education on children's personality is particularly important.
As parents, first of all, we should know that different family atmosphere has different effects on children's personality.
1, good family atmosphere
A good family atmosphere contributes to the formation of children's good character. Family members get along well, care for each other, parents are harmonious, parent-child communication is smooth, intimate, polite and reasonable. The family atmosphere is stable and harmonious, harmonious and warm, pleasant and comfortable. A good family atmosphere brings children a sense of trust, security and happiness. Children can always feel their parents' care and companionship, have great trust in their parents, are safe at home, and are willing to share every bit of life with their parents.
2. Bad family atmosphere
The disharmony between parents is one of the main reasons that hinder the healthy development of children's personality. Children growing up in such a family environment will feel extremely insecure and have a sense of belonging. A personality that is inherently fragile and tends to be withdrawn or hyperactive. Such children often lack self-confidence in communication, but they are very eager to get the attention and affirmation of others, so they often lose more than they gain.
Because of the lack of communication in the family, children's desire to communicate with others is suppressed, so they often show too much enthusiasm when communicating with others. Due to the lack of care and emptiness in the family, children pay special attention to their friends and are impulsive. Strong sense of self-defense, very concerned about what others think of themselves, but also very sensitive, easy to conflict with others. Children with tense family atmosphere are insecure, often emotionally unstable, easily nervous, fearful and anxious for a long time.
Different parenting styles have different effects on children's personality. As parents, we should know these differences.
1, tyrannical family upbringing
This educational model, in popular terms, is to believe that "talents come from sticks." Parents treat their children simply and rudely, asking them to obey themselves absolutely. Expect too much from children, lack patience to listen to their opinions, and lack the ability to communicate with them effectively. Paying attention to results is more important than process. If children's expectations cannot be met, parents will treat their children severely and even blame them.
Because of the lack of communication with children, they often don't know what their children are thinking, don't know their own children, and don't give them the right to speak and participate. Some children in this way of education are afraid of their parents, feel insecure and dare not express their feelings. Over time, children tend to be timid, self-abased, introverted and resigned, and dare not express their opinions in front of others.
Step 2 grow up independently
By educating children in this way, parents can treat their children equally and respect them, that is, "squatting" to communicate with their children. Parents are independent, kind and care about their children. They often communicate with children, criticize and correct their shortcomings in a timely and effective manner, do not indulge their children casually or unprincipled, and use appreciation education and punishment education reasonably and appropriately.
Parents can actively negotiate with their children and encourage them to participate in family decision-making. The children trained in this way are good at exchanging ideas and discussing problems with their parents, and can gradually cultivate the ability to think and solve problems independently. Such children are generally confident and optimistic, love life, be friendly to others, and have their own opinions.
3. Family rearing patterns based on indulgence
Parents are full of love and expectation for their children, but love lacks reason and discretion. They seldom demand or discipline their children. They are afraid of losing their hands and falling, and they are too protective and accommodating, so that children rarely rely on their parents and rarely ask or discipline their children. This is ambiguous. Parents' doting will also make children feel superior and form a self-centered character.
In life and study, these children cannot be wronged at all. When they encounter setbacks, they are easily discouraged, lose their temper, pass the buck, and easily blame external factors for the problems. Lack of gratitude and feedback. Weak interpersonal skills, it is difficult to get along with people around you, and it is easy to form a selfish and willful bad character.
4, the contradiction of family rearing patterns.
Different parenting styles mainly mean that parents have different parenting styles for their children. We often see such a scene: dad reprimands and educates the children, but the mother keeps excusing the children and even scolds dad. Practice has proved that the inconsistency of parents' educational requirements not only offsets the educational effect, but also encourages children to use the contradiction between parents to cover up their own shortcomings and mistakes, and even develops a dual character of prejudice against other people's behavior and arbitrariness.