Xiao Yu, a psychological counselor, is studying cognitive behavioral therapy techniques. She wants to be more proficient in this psychological technology and grow up to be a cognitive behavioral consultant. She came to consult.
@ 中中中中: We enter the module of personal growth 7: Identify useless assumptions and reconstruct new alternative assumptions.
Starting from this module, our attention will shift to a deeper and more inaccessible level of thinking: potential assumptions, attitudes and life principles, which will affect us in different situations.
For example, Xiao Yu's internal thinking mode may be: If I perform well in all aspects, others may not realize that I have shortcomings, so I will work very hard to be perfect. If not, that would be very bad.
Under such assumptions, attitudes and living standards, Xiaoyu turned herself into a "workaholic". When she wants to rest but dare not, she will have inner conflicts and be very painful. At this time, some adjustments are needed.
Through self-practice, this module mainly identifies potential assumptions and behavior patterns related to the way of existence, constructs more beneficial assumptions or life rules, and develops more adaptive thinking and behavior patterns.
In the classic cognitive behavior theory, human thinking includes three levels: automatic thinking, potential assumptions and core beliefs.
Automatic thinking, generally related to specific situations, is a fleeting and evaluative idea that pops up automatically in your mind.
Core belief is a person's absolute and unconditional belief in himself, others and the world, and its development is often influenced by important others or traumatic experiences in childhood.
Latent hypothesis, also known as intermediate belief, is between automatic thinking and core belief, which helps us to cope with the influence of core belief. It is often a cross-scene assumption, about the operating rules or life rules of yourself, others and the world. It is often expressed by "must, should, must" or "if … then ……", and faith is often associated with behavior and emotion.
For example, Xiao Yu's core belief may be "I'm not good enough". In response to this belief, her underlying assumption guides her behavior: if I do everything perfectly, then others will not know that "I am not good enough". Therefore, Xiaoyu will work very hard, pay great attention to every detail he has done, strive to be perfect and become a workaholic.
Therefore, after we realize and understand the automatic thinking of a specific situation, we need to determine our own internal unhelpful potential assumptions.
How to identify them? There are three ways:
First, identify recurring personal themes.
Help you determine your personal theme by constantly recording your recurring situations, thoughts, emotions and behaviors.
Second, identify compensation behavior.
For example, repetitive behavior and rigid coping strategies are typical compensation behaviors. These behaviors include: striving for perfection; Seek the affirmation of others; When things get worse, blame others; Please others; It is difficult to refuse others; It's hard to stick to who you really are, it's hard to make decisions, and so on.
We use this compensation behavior to make others lose sight of the core beliefs that we feel bad about.
Third, identify avoidance behavior.
Avoidance is an act. Even if the object of avoidance comes from our emotions, we are protecting ourselves by avoiding specific situations, people, thoughts, emotions and physical feelings to avoid pain or difficulties.
Typical avoidance behaviors include: trying not to think about unpleasant things, playing computer games or surfing the Internet for a long time, quitting when there is interpersonal conflict, staying away from the crowd when you feel hurt, indulging in game shopping, substance abuse and so on.
Finally, you can sum up your most unhelpful hypothesis.
For example, Xiao Yu's most unhelpful assumption is that if I avoid discussing with the leader, he won't know that I am a useless employee. So she is often silent during meetings, even if she has any questions.
After identifying useless assumptions, we should create a series of new alternative assumptions and new thinking and behavior patterns.
We need to ask ourselves the following questions:
What kind of feeling do I want? How do I want to see myself, others and the world? Where do I want to go? What do I want to be in the end?
For example, Xiaoyu's new substitution hypothesis is:
If I take the initiative to discuss with the leader, he will know that I am an employee who takes the initiative to solve problems. I want to be a problem solver.
Then, we can create our own new model.
We can look to the future and imagine:
What do you need to do if the new potential hypothesis becomes a reality? What do you feel? Think about what? What new thinking and behavior patterns will replace the old ones? What images or ideas are beneficial to yourself or others?
Please let your imagination run free. If it is hard to imagine in this situation, you can also try to imagine yourself as another person (such as a close friend or role model) to gain the cognition and behavior that may support your new potential hypothesis.
At this point, the sharing of "Module 7: Identifying Useless Hypothesis and Reconstructing New Substitution Hypothesis" is completed, and now it enters the routine self-reflection link.
Self-reflection:
1. What did you experience in determining the potential hypothesis? Do you have any special emotional, behavioral, physical or cognitive reactions? Did you encounter any difficulties? Or did you find any surprises?
2. As a person and/or consultant, have you found any personal topics that can help you better understand yourself? Will these exercises be different in understanding these topics?
3. Do some specific visitors often trigger your useless assumptions? Can you understand why? If so, do you want to do anything different? It may be helpful to draw a circle to maintain this problem. )
Can you find the connection between your "consultant hypothesis" and "personal hypothesis"? How to understand these connections? What does this tell you?
5. What is the process of determining an alternative, new and more beneficial hypothesis? To what extent does your brain believe the new hypothesis? Do your "intuitive level" or "rational level" have different views on this? If not, what do you think?
6. How will your experience affect you in helping visitors determine their potential assumptions in future consultations?
7. What part of this module do you want to remember most? Make a list and write down the main points you want to remember when you meet visitors in the future.
What are your feelings and thoughts after practice? Welcome to share and communicate.
I hope today's psychological tips can help you.
Tips:
Today's sharing comes from the personal growth of cognitive behavioral therapists, James Bennitt-Levy and others.
He is a professor of mental health at the University of Sydney Rural Health Center. In his early years, he worked in Oxford Cognitive Therapy Center, and he has rich attainments in cognitive behavioral therapy. He initiated self-experience cognitive behavioral therapy, integrated self-practice into the training and supervision of cognitive behavioral therapy, and instructed hundreds of therapists to use this method.
I am also a psychological counselor with cognitive behavioral orientation, and I am constantly improving cognitive behavioral therapy. In practice, I have also seen many visitors benefit from this therapy and get out of the psychological shadow that has plagued them for many years. I also hope to bring you more cognitive behavioral therapy methods to help them.
# The secret of growth # Article 87
Su Xin, psychological/career counselor: national second-level psychological counselor, career planner, American active parenting lecturer, sandplay therapist, interpersonal relationship counselor, and British mind map tutor.
Case duration 1000 hours, 10 years+management, 5 years+psychology, result-oriented, accompany you to play around the workplace, feel happy at home, design life to be yourself, live simply and enjoy happiness!
This tip comes from "Personal Growth of Cognitive Behavioral Therapists-A Manual of Self-practice and Self-reflection", and I would like to thank you.