Parent A: Try to create a comfortable atmosphere at home. Don't let your children feel depressed. Don't always say that there is no future after you fail the exam. Pay more attention to him in life, analyze with him and help him set some suitable short-term goals. Don't order something too high and unrealistic. Give him (her) appropriate praise when he (she) reaches the goal and encourage him (her) to move towards the next goal. Talk to him (her) about some topics he (she) is interested in, relieve the pressure of study, and ask him (her) questions in his (her) study when he (she) is relaxed. When a child asks questions, he (she) should answer patiently, so that he (she) feels that his (her) parents are the objects of his (her) communication, and appropriately tell some famous people or success stories similar to him (her) in communication, so as to build his (her) confidence. Parents b:
First, the pressure on children is largely not from the college entrance examination itself, but from the expectations of parents. Parents should position themselves as logistics ministers, rather than front-line supervisors, and should give their children more encouragement and spiritual support, rather than accusations and strict supervision. If your children are diligent, you really don't have to gild the lily. If your children are lazy and lax, it is much better to tell them than to order them to do something. This is the first thing parents should understand.
Second, many parents misunderstand that the college entrance examination is for children, so parents can do anything except the college entrance examination. This view is incorrect. The college entrance examination is not only a problem for children, but also a problem for the whole family. Parents should also know that the college entrance examination is actually a war. It is children who go to the front, but parents who supply food and grass. I believe that parents will not understand the truth that "the three armed forces have not moved, and food and grass come first". Therefore, your children should be allowed to do what they should do while preparing for the exam, and of course what they can do, such as doing simple housework. This seems redundant, but it is actually a conceptual principle, which will make children understand that the college entrance examination does not mean that they can be arrogant, and they can open their mouths and stretch out their clothes. The college entrance examination mobilizes not only individuals who go to the front line, but an entire family! Many parents will make every effort to give their children the best learning environment. This practice actually put a lot of pressure on their children. At this time, the child will think that if he does not do well in the exam, he will not only be sorry for himself, but also for his parents who have put up with hardships. This kind of pressure will continue until after the college entrance examination, when the results can be imagined. Therefore, let children do what they should do and do what they can, so that children can better meet the coming of the college entrance examination.
Third, the college entrance examination is not isolated from the world! Many parents believe that in order to create a good learning atmosphere for their children, they will try their best to isolate their children from the real society, that is, try their best to keep them away from some negative and bad things or things, so that they can concentrate on their studies and have no distractions. This is a wrong view. The reason is simple: the environment in which people live is not a vacuum. Since it is not a vacuum, bacteria must exist. Where there is air, there are bacteria. Similarly, where there is a society, people cannot be isolated from the world. Children will inevitably come into contact with things that parents think should be taboo, which parents can't avoid. Therefore, our prevention method is not to blindly avoid the uncertain factors brought by the environment, but to give them a dose of "vaccine" to make them immune. The best way is to introduce them to the negative information that may appear in the college entrance examination appropriately and gently, so that children can know that society will not become particularly beautiful because of the arrival of the college entrance examination, and society is still that complicated society, and anything can happen. Parents must let them know that during their college entrance examination, they may witness someone jumping off a building, someone will have unfortunate things and so on. This is not to scare children, nor to dampen their self-confidence, but to "immunize" in advance, which can prevent some things from happening during the college entrance examination, so that children will not be at a loss because of sudden changes, thus affecting their grades.
Four, the college entrance examination in addition to the usual basic accumulation, practice and other classroom knowledge, the cultivation of psychological quality is an equally important factor. If you have a good psychological quality, you will win half of the college entrance examination. Because in addition to the amount of knowledge in the examination room, we must also talk about improvisation. Good psychological quality is a powerful weapon for children! Therefore, training should start at ordinary times and accumulate over time, which is a river and sea. The best way is to combine the above three points.
Well, I said the above four points in one breath. Finally, I sincerely wish all parents, in this extraordinary period, to get along well with your children, accompany them to the battlefield of the college entrance examination smoothly, and return home in triumph!
Parent C: Remember that parents are the children's logistics! 1, materially, ensure nutrition, senior three is very brain-consuming, make up more! 2. Psychologically, in fact, senior three students are somewhat abnormal under pressure. Parents should be more tolerant and enlighten their children. 3. Communicate with the teacher more and see if you can help. 4, take the initiative to communicate with children, you don't have to let children talk about how they are at school, parents can talk about their own things to drive their children. 5. Don't always care about children. In fact, children need their own space. Too much concern from parents sometimes backfires. In short, it is to master a degree according to different children. That is, caring for children and giving them space. Don't always force your child to score in the recent simulation. Then he/she will feel very tired.
Don't be too wordy, it will increase his/her irritability. Care about him/her like a friend.
Take action according to students' personality. Guide introverted senior three students to talk more, and don't hide their nervousness and anxiety in their hearts.
Senior three students with poor psychological endurance should say more positive words and not pass on negative situations. ...
In addition, change the pattern of dishes so that children will not affect their health because of loss of appetite.
Parent Ding: Parents expect too much, and children tend to be impatient.
Senior three parents must face up to their children's real achievements during the period before the exam, and avoid placing unrealistic expectations on their children and even causing impatience to affect the preparation for the exam.
At this stage before the exam, you should accept your child's true level and don't be impatient. Parents should not set unrealistic goals for their children in the preparation period, and try to make their children make great progress through a period of hard work. Each child has different personality characteristics, different learning foundations, different specialties and hobbies, and different directions for developing intellectual potential. Parents should make reasonable demands on their children, lower their expectations and encourage them to actively prepare for the exam. Parents should take the children themselves as a reference, find out their progress and changes at any time, and tell them to do their best. Senior three parents should keep a normal mind and use a peaceful mind to infect and guide their children to meet the college entrance examination.
Parents should create a harmonious family preparation atmosphere, communicate with their children with an optimistic attitude, respect their wishes, encourage and affirm more, enhance their self-confidence, and allow them to vent their emotions appropriately in the face of pressure.
Actively respond to performance fluctuations
With the approach of the college entrance examination, some candidates have different degrees of psychological anxiety due to the fluctuation of their grades. Relevant psychological teachers suggest that senior three students should mobilize positive emotions and correctly treat performance fluctuations.
From the psychological counseling rooms of some schools, we know that in the sprint stage before the exam, the number of senior three students who come to consult is higher than before. With the end of two mock exams, many senior three students have fluctuations in their grades, and their mood is also high and low.
The fluctuation of grades makes some senior three students feel inferior and begin to doubt their abilities. They feel that the unstable performance is due to the lack of solid knowledge, and they are worried that the results of the college entrance examination are not ideal. The fluctuation of test scores can easily make some candidates lose confidence. One or two unsatisfactory exam results do not mean that there is no strength, and candidates do not have to be overly anxious or even deny themselves. Candidates should have a correct attitude and understand that it is a good thing to find shortcomings through exams.
When the examinee is in a bad mood, he can think more about the happy things in his life and write some positive words in his notebook, such as "I can do it, calm down" to help him improve his confidence, optimize his mood and relax.
Candidates should also learn to analyze the reasons for the fluctuation of their grades and find out whether they are not in place for review or not paying enough attention to the exam. Is the exam topic too difficult, or is the examination room nervous? Only by finding the problem and prescribing the right medicine can we really solve the problem of performance fluctuation.
Parent E: According to the survey data, 80% students think that if the first mock exam is not ideal, it will affect their learning mood and motivation; Only 25% of the students think that the mock exam is only a means to test the learning situation, which helps them to check the missing and fill the gaps, and at the same time can effectively handle the exam results. The reasons are as follows: 40% students said that their emotional stability was affected because they couldn't stand their parents' nagging, resulting in psychological reactions such as depression, self-denial, self-doubt and even withdrawal, and they wanted to give up the college entrance examination; Students who want teachers and parents to stop nagging about their academic performance account for 75% of the total survey.
Surprisingly, as many as 45% of parents said that their children were very nervous about taking the college entrance examination; 25% of parents think that if their children's grades are not ideal, they can't accept it; 20% of parents are worried about their children's study; 10% people don't know how to deal with the relationship between children's college entrance examination and work. Through in-depth analysis, the reporter found that more than 90% of senior three parents are more or less suffering from "acrophobia".
In dealing with the college entrance examination, quite a few students lack strategies. Once the mock exam results are not ideal or different from their own predictions, they will be nervous, anxious and self-denying, and even many people give up the college entrance examination in the last month. In the final analysis, most of these sources of tension come from the pressure of teachers and parents. Most parents show more anxiety than their children. They not only pick up the logistics every day, but also contact the teaching teacher every day to pay attention to the children's every move, which makes the children feel very bad. What's worse, there will be quarrels between the children and their parents. Both students and parents should treat the college entrance examination itself correctly. Generally speaking, parents are very suggestive of their children. The positive attitude of parents will definitely make children have a good attitude and add points for their college entrance examination, otherwise it will have a negative impact. Parents should adjust from four aspects: first, create a quiet, relaxed, harmonious and happy family atmosphere for their children; The second is to do a good job in children's logistics; Third, deal with your bad emotions in time; The fourth is to help children build self-confidence.
Guidance of common psychological problems of senior three students
Senior three students are about to face the life choice of choosing a job or continuing their studies. Facing the new challenges, where to go is really a difficult problem for junior high school students who are not deeply involved in the world. Parents' high expectations for their children and the diversified value orientation of society also make senior three students often experience strong inner conflicts and pressures. The mental health education of senior three students needs the attention of parents, teachers and society. Mental health education should always run through a main line: cultivate self-confidence → be brave in making progress → be not afraid of setbacks → meet challenges → strive for success!
First, psychological guidance: how to alleviate academic anxiety?
The academic anxiety of senior three students is mainly manifested in exam anxiety and lack of learning motivation.
Students' test anxiety is reflected in paying too much attention to test scores, and in the final analysis, it is anxiety about their own future. There are three reasons: first, because of the group effect, scores are regarded as the only index to measure students' ability. Second, unconsciously equate getting a high degree with your own life value. Third, students' desire for self-realization and unsatisfactory academic performance lead to cognitive disharmony.
Only by reducing the psychological burden and study burden can we reduce the stress of study and spirit and grow up healthily and happily. In order to alleviate and eliminate test anxiety, you can try the following strategies:
Choosing the appropriate target motivation level, too strong or too weak motivation level will easily lead to failure experience and psychological stress.
No one knows the future. Don't worry too much about the future, put your energy and time into real life and study.
Do a good job of knowledge preparation before the exam, as well as countermeasures and psychological preparation to deal with emergencies in the exam. Only when you are prepared can you be prepared.
You might as well use the "extreme thinking method" to imagine the worst possible outcome of the event you are anxious about. You will find that the present situation is still optimistic.
Lack of learning motivation (that is, the problem of learning motivation) often plagues students. On the one hand, students have the need to improve their grades, on the other hand, they are prone to impetuous and bored emotions, which leads to lack of motivation or motivation in learning. There are two kinds of learning motivation: internal (lasting) and external (short-lived). Only when learners are "knowledgeable", "eager to learn" and "willing to learn" and give their own learning a higher evaluation in value will they have lasting learning motivation. Of course, the external motivation of learning is also necessary. Only when the two are in harmony can they complement each other.
Second, the guidance of psychological problems: correctly treat the problem of self-confidence
Some students have doubts about their abilities because their efforts can't see the effect in a short time. This situation is due to the failure to establish a correct concept of attribution. Psychoanalyst Adler said in his book Beyond Inferiority: "In fact, everyone is inferior, but to different degrees. Because we found that our current situation can be further improved. " In this sense, inferiority can also be a driving force for a person's progress, and life is getting better and better by constantly surpassing inferiority.
However, persistent and excessive inferiority can easily lead to mental illness. When encountering setbacks, it is suggested that students may wish to try the following strategies:
1. Have an objective and comprehensive evaluation of yourself.
2. Be good at attributing success to your own ability.
3. Experience inner joy and sense of accomplishment, and think that failure is due to insufficient or ineffective efforts.
4. It is advisable to set phased goals.
5. Experience a sense of accomplishment in the process of constantly achieving goals.
6. Enhance self-confidence.
7. Treat setbacks optimistically and calmly, because setbacks are also a necessary condition for success.
Third, psychological counseling: how to improve interpersonal communication?
Many students are troubled by the difficulty in communicating with their parents, teachers and classmates in their life and study. The fundamental reason lies in the differences between people's positions and viewpoints. In order to improve this situation, we might as well learn "empathy", which is what we often call "caring for others". After all, people need to understand each other.
Of course, some communication skills are better and will further improve your interpersonal relationship.
Fourth, the guidance of psychological problems: how to overcome distraction?
Middle school students often have inattention, distraction and "distraction" in their studies. There may be the following reasons for distraction: boredom caused by monotonous stimulation, such as repetitive and boring learning materials; Denying the value of the object of concern leads to the failure of will efforts or giving up efforts; Another situation is the fatigue effect caused by mental fatigue.
The theory of "attention tension" puts forward the concept of learning unit time. Because of personality differences, everyone's study unit time may be different. Some people think that a person's best study unit time is about 25 minutes. Generally speaking, a study unit time is a state of nervous attention, and learners should avoid being distracted in a given study unit time.
You can try the following three-step control method to overcome distraction: First, when there are some stagnant emotions, learners should be sensitive to them and remind themselves not to be prisoners of emotions. The second step is to start learning according to the set review plan as soon as possible. The third step is to continue learning until you finish it.
Understand the above truth, learners should overcome the bad habit of distraction in one learning unit time, thus improving learning efficiency.
Five, the guidance of psychological problems: a correct understanding of the exam and preparation.
Society calls for quality education and students call for quality education. Some senior three students think that "exam-oriented education" is serious in many schools at present, so they have a rebellious attitude towards the one-sided pursuit of exam-oriented education, which objectively affects the review and preparation for senior three.
First of all, we must affirm students' strong desire for quality education, which is a sign of positive progress. Teachers should actively implement quality education in teaching, facing all students, especially helping underachievers enthusiastically, instead of focusing only on students with prospects for further study; We should pay attention to cultivating students' comprehensive quality, not just intellectual education; We should actively inspire students' thinking and develop their personality, instead of engaging in full-house irrigation and sea tactics.
Secondly, we should guide students to treat preparation and examination correctly. "Exam-oriented" and "exam-oriented education" are two different concepts. Whether it is exam-oriented education or quality education, exams are needed at present. Although the college entrance examination system is not perfect, it needs further reform. However, in today's fierce competition in the market economy, the college entrance examination is still a relatively fair means of selecting talents. At present, it is impossible to popularize university education in China, and the competition for college entrance examination is bound to be fierce. We should face this reality objectively and strive to improve our quality in all aspects in order to become talents at an early date.
Sixth, the guidance of psychological problems: get rid of depression and inferiority.
The tactics of asking questions about the sea are not advocated before the college entrance examination, but proper preparation and review are still needed. Some students think they can't do it because of their poor test scores several times, so they are prone to depression and inferiority.
If you want to win, win yourself first. Self-confidence is very important in preparing for exams. How to eliminate depression and inferiority complex and enhance self-confidence?
First, we should look at ourselves correctly. Fully see your own strength, don't ask for perfect results in every exam, and don't deny yourself because of poor results in one or two exams. Don't always compare your grades with the top students in your class. Your grades in this class are below average, which may be the whole school or the whole province.
Second, we should carefully analyze the reasons for not doing well in the exam. Maybe I didn't review well, maybe my psychological tension didn't play its due level, or maybe it was too difficult for the teacher to give the questions.
Third, we must stand the test of failure. Don't feel inferior even if your study foundation is poor and your continuous exam results are not ideal. The correct attitude is to find out the reasons, change methods, adjust plans, make up the gap, and make persistent efforts to strive for the highest level of college entrance examination. When the two armies are at war, it is unknown who wins and who loses. There is no reason to despise yourself.
Seven, psychological guidance seven: learn to relieve psychological pressure.
In the third year of senior high school, with the approach of the college entrance examination, students have entered a state of intense review and preparation, so some students feel fierce competition, great pressure and tension. In this regard, teachers and parents must give timely guidance, and students themselves must learn to relieve psychological pressure.
Psychological research has found that maintaining moderate psychological pressure is conducive to reviewing and preparing for the college entrance examination. However, excessive pressure will cause tension and impatience; Without pressure, it is not conducive to the improvement of learning efficiency. Therefore, candidates must learn to adjust their psychological pressure.
First of all, we should realize that with the approach of the college entrance examination, it is normal for students to take time to review and actively prepare for the exam, just as the army needs pre-war training and athletes need pre-competition training. With this understanding, we can turn pressure into motivation.
Secondly, we should make our own review plan under the guidance of the teacher, so as to give priority to "I", be tight but not chaotic, and not blindly follow others. We should take the usual time as the examination time, take the examination time as the normal time, and try our best to review and prepare for the exam with a calm mood.
Third, we should pay attention to unity. Students are competitive, friendly, help each other and make progress together. Don't be afraid that your classmates will surpass you. If you help your classmates, you will get their help and win their friendship. Reviewing in a relaxed and friendly atmosphere will achieve better results, and will also play its highest level in the college entrance examination.
Eight, psychological guidance: parents should support the understanding of children.
Most senior three students are only children. Parents want their children to succeed, and they all expect their children to be admitted to universities and good universities. In this way, it is inevitable to nag frequently, causing pressure on children intentionally or unintentionally, and making students feel family pressure, irritability and distress.
It is understandable that parents want their children to go to college and become talents, but they should be properly educated. Parents should not only care about their children's study and life, but also care about their mental health.
In the third year of high school, children are nervous in study, have great psychological pressure and are easily agitated. Parents should not give their children too much study pressure. Parents should be tight inside and loose outside, and don't take some time to take their children shopping or playing in the park to adjust their psychology, communication and emotions.
In the third year of high school, there will be more exams, and parents should treat their children's exam results correctly. Sometimes, parents should not make a fuss about their children's poor exam results, let alone scold them. They should calmly analyze the reasons why they failed in the exam with their children.
Parents should cooperate with teachers, give timely guidance, and eliminate the troubles in children's hearts. Parents should encourage and praise every advantage and progress of their children and enhance their self-confidence. Family should be a quiet harbor for children's study and life, and parents should create a relaxed and happy family environment for their children, so that they can have a healthy psychology to review and prepare for the exam.
Teachers and parents should find out all kinds of psychological obstacles existing in senior three students in time, give timely care and guidance, help students eliminate psychological diseases, and let them review for the exam with self-confidence, health and upward mental state, meet the college entrance examination and move towards a broader road of life!
Eight Points for Attention in Parents' Education of Senior Three Students
Students' college entrance examination results are not unrelated to the influence of the external environment. The external factor that has the greatest influence on college entrance examination students is the family environment. Senior three parents should play the role of solving problems and providing logistical support for students. However, if the boot is wrong, it may have the opposite effect. Parents should pay attention to eight aspects when playing their own roles.
Taboos are like enemies. After entering senior three, parents' "test anxiety" will not only directly infect students, but also make parents lose their cool. Therefore, parents should first ensure their children's emotional stability and pay attention to diluting the tension in their hearts with their positive and optimistic attitude.
Second, avoid nagging. Don't talk about the college entrance examination all day, and don't stimulate children with words like "fighting for their parents". Excessive exhortation will only have a negative impact on children's physiology and psychology. Parents should not interfere too much with their children's behavior, but give them a relaxed review environment.
3. Avoid excessive concern. Excessive care will give children greater pressure, whether it is spiritual care or material care for students, it should be moderate.
Four bogey expectations are too high. To understand the actual level of children, don't give them too high expectations. Parents should be the guides for their children to set college entrance examination goals.
Five taboos blindly compare. Don't tell children how other students learn to be good and diligent, which will increase their rebellious psychology. Instead, we should do more vertical comparisons, find ways to keep abreast of our own progress, help us analyze our own advantages and disadvantages, and achieve the effect of fostering strengths and avoiding weaknesses and boosting morale.
The contrast between the six taboos is too great. Don't change the family environment or atmosphere too much. It is not unreasonable for the basic necessities of life to remain the same. Children can watch TV, listen to music or go shopping properly.
Seven avoid coercion and inducement. Don't use some rewards to arouse children's enthusiasm. This will not only fail to motivate children, but may lead to psychological imbalance.
Eight taboos: excessive tutoring. Don't spare no effort to ask a famous teacher to be a tutor and start a new kitchen. This will not only take up the time for children to digest the review content freely, but also be suspected of encouragement.