First of all, I firmly believe that evaluation is subjective, and everyone has their own standards and opinions. Because of this, the external evaluation is diverse and it is impossible to meet everyone's expectations. I realized that linking myself with other people's comments would only make me confused and anxious. So I choose to believe in my own efforts and achievements, rather than care too much about the external evaluation.
Secondly, I think external evaluation is valuable feedback. Although everyone has their own preferences and opinions, others' feedback can help me understand my own strengths and weaknesses and find the direction for improvement. The kindness of relatives may be out of concern and expectation for me, although sometimes their methods may be too direct or too harsh. But I will listen to and measure their suggestions with an open mind, and gradually improve my ability and level through reflection and introspection.
In addition, I often use divergent thinking to broaden my horizons when I look at external evaluations. I will think from different angles and look for diversified comments and opinions. For example, some people criticize my slow progress in academia, and I will try to re-examine my research direction and methods and think about whether it is necessary to explore new fields or seek new cooperation possibilities. I will also take the initiative to participate in academic seminars and exchange activities and ask excellent colleagues for experience and suggestions. Through an open mind and extensive communication, I can look at myself from different angles and get a more comprehensive and valuable evaluation.
Finally, I think the external evaluation is only a reference on my life path, not the only measure. Everyone has their own unique life trajectory and goals. As long as I set clear goals for myself according to my own rhythm and values and make persistent efforts, I believe I can achieve what I want. At the same time, I will always be modest and prudent, keep learning attitude, and constantly improve my ability and knowledge.
To remain firm in the torrent of external evaluation, we need to constantly reflect and correct our own views. As a 30-year-old professor, I will treat the external evaluation positively in a divergent way. Believe in yourself, accept feedback, broaden your horizons, keep your goals, believe that you can better cope with the goodwill urging of your loved ones, and at the same time unswervingly pursue your own life value and achievements.
supplement
Self-awareness and growth mentality. The following is a summary of some of the main points you mentioned:
Subjective evaluation: you emphasize the subjectivity of evaluation and realize that it is impossible to meet everyone's expectations, so you choose to believe in your own efforts and achievements instead of being influenced by external evaluation.
Feedback value of external evaluation: You regard the feedback potential of external evaluation as a useful guide to improve your ability and performance.
Divergent thinking, multi-angle: you adopt divergent thinking, think about external evaluation from different angles, so as to obtain more comprehensive information, and at the same time absorb the experience and suggestions of others through active communication and cooperation.
Personal goals and values: You only take external evaluation as a reference on the road of life, emphasize personal uniqueness, adhere to your own goals and values, and constantly improve yourself.
These views show that you have a positive attitude and adaptability, which will help you grow and succeed in your life and career.