Tell me about me first. Your son and I are in a similar situation, even though he was taken care of by his family since childhood. My family conditions are average, and my mother dotes on me. The whole meaning of her life is me. Of course, many parents are like this, but the way of education is different. My mother is the kind of person who doesn't want me to make any decisions. She has a lot of wisdom in life, so she thinks it is the best choice to help me make a decision, which will cause me to never grow up, because in her eyes, I will always be a child! So I didn't know what I was studying for since I was a child, not for my dreams, not for myself, but for my mother and her praise. I didn't think praise was worth playing, so I didn't study in junior high school and did poorly in the senior high school entrance examination. My mother paid someone, and I went to a private high school. At that time, I began to live on campus and gradually began to adapt to many things. Slowly, I found that some things were actually decided by myself, and it felt great! At that time, I sneaked over the wall and ran out to surf the Internet, playing games that I don't care about now, but I really felt my change. I changed from a good boy to a child who began to think independently. Without the daily indoctrination from my parents, I began to deal with my classmates and teachers myself. Slowly, I found that I could learn well. I found that I studied for myself, so I did well in the college entrance examination. When I went to college, my way of thinking became more open. Usually my parents won't let me do anything, so I will try something, because I know that many life experiences are more profound than others, such as young people who don't work hard and old people who are sad. When I was a child, my mother told me to work hard, but I was so young that I didn't know what a boss was, but I didn't feel it until the third year of high school. Now I am the boss. So I left my hometown for Beijing directly after graduation, regardless of the willy-nilly. My cousin is a doctoral supervisor in Tsinghua University. She repeatedly discouraged me from going to the real estate agent who was an intern at that time, so I went anyway. I have worked there for three months, which proves that I am a capable person. My relatives say that this industry can't stay. But I have gained many friends, customers, people who are willing to help me, and the yardstick for finding a formal job. Now I'll give you a signal in the office of a foreign company.
Having said so much, I wonder if you have noticed. You said your son always felt like a child. Have you ever thought that it is because parents' ideas have never changed and they still feel that their children need care and care? He never knows what kind of life belongs to him, because he has never made a decision by himself, so he is afraid to leave your wings when it is time to make a decision. The word self-confidence has clearly told us that faith is for ourselves, and so is trust in ourselves. Your son is not confident because he never needs confidence. If something happens to his parents, he will find a rope to tell you that he is in big trouble now and I can't solve it. You also said that your family condition is not good, and it is impossible to support him for life. I know this is the root cause. Your family conditions are yours. As long as these things are not your son's, he won't know what it means to cherish hard work and support his family. I'm not saying that you want to give him the property, but that he doesn't have his own world outlook and outlook on life.
He said that he wanted to learn this and that because he saw that his peers would learn this and that, which was very handsome. He can't find the true meaning of life, so he thinks it is. However, when he contacted, he found that this was not what he wanted, and he had to find something else, such as fooling around with friends in similar situations, wasting time and giving up on himself.
But I want to say that if your son really doesn't have a girlfriend as you said, then he must have the seeds of progress in his heart, because it is easy to degenerate and he can't find a girlfriend. Many girls want to play with him, and he can find one to play with, because he can ask his parents for money at any time. He did this not because the other half he wanted was excellent, but because he didn't deserve it, not necessarily because he really didn't deserve it, but because he felt inferior! So this is the motivation to make progress.
I don't know how inferior and autistic your son is. If he is really sick and angry, you can't force him to start from a simple job and make a little change, so that he feels that the outside world needs him, not your pet. Things have come to this, mostly because of your way of education. You say that you seek medical advice, but you never look for reasons from yourself, thinking that it is a child's problem, but what is the reality?
I hope it helps you.